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Posted by: presleynfactsrock ( )
Date: July 15, 2013 03:48AM

I do not temple
I do no dunk
Beyond a doubt
It's Joseph Smith Junk

I do not tithe
Nor do I fast
The Celestial Kingdom?
Way beyond my grasp

Ward sinks and toilets
I do not touch
Leaving them to Monson
To scrub and such

I do not miss
The Sunday Scene
Always so boring
Leaving one green

It felt so-o good
Made me feel much better
Putting a stamp
On that Resignation Letter

Looking in a mirror
Who do I see?
A gullible Mormon?
Nada, only saved me!


Once in a while this is my entertainment. I know. I should be hospitalized.


I triple dare you to show me up!!! (not a demanding task!)

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Posted by: checker of minor facts ( )
Date: July 15, 2013 04:12AM

Its kind of fun to read. I would only critique your 2nd verse, because the CK doesn't exist, so I wouldn't want any TBM to misinterpet that we are wanting in any way. So I submit the following:

I do not tithe
Nor do I fast
The Celestial Kingdom?
What a bunch of trash!

Anyone, please improve on this! ;)

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Posted by: Leaving ( )
Date: July 15, 2013 04:52AM

BIC
Baptized at 8
Priesthood at 12
Started to masturbate

18 month mission
(so glad not 24)
College at BYU
Got married before...

I found out the truth
It's so obvious now
But those trapped inside
Think I've broken my vow

He must be sinning
Else why would he leave?
The top 15 are like gods
and continue to deceive

Missed my daughter's wedding
Sat outside on the lawn
I'm a grandpa now
Younger days are gone

I think I still love my wife
Sometimes I'm not so sure
I'm usually last on her list
That's hard to endure

The Church is always first
She follows every little rule
Her 2nd earring was sexy
GBH won, he's so not cool

Trying to be patient
Someday she'll see the light
It may take a mircale
Then all will be right

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Posted by: presleynfactsrock ( )
Date: July 15, 2013 07:26PM

Checker of minor facts, thanks for your second verse suggestion---it reads truer (is that even a word?) I also made some other changes in my little poem which, I think, improved it. (yes, I can be obsessive.) Noticed that we both have the word facts in our screen name---right on. FACTS RULE.

And, Leaving, your poetry was fun to read----thanks for posting.
Made me feelsad for you that the church seems to come first in your wife's eyes. I do hope she sees the light as the light is so much brighter when you are FREE.

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