I was born into the LDS church, and while they tell you it is a choice to be baptized, it isn’t. I watch people tell their children, “Don’t you want to go to Heaven with us? Well, you need to be baptized or else you can’t.” That is the mentality of these people, you have a choice, and it is the one they give you like all religious faiths.

I’ve always been a black sheep in my family and while I do believe that most religions have a pretty good message they overall all have crazy beliefs. I realized this when I was a teenager and thought to myself I’ll be out at eighteen. I was wrong, sadly.

I met my wife who I was falling in love with and she turned out to be Mormon, but they weren’t very active, so I had hoped that it would stay that way. Again, I was wrong. I find it sad for Mormon women that are thrown this idea that you have to find the “perfect” Mormon boy and marry him as soon as possible to have his children. My wife was one of those people brought up that way.

Down the road I tried and I tried really hard to do something with the faith. I prayed, I read the Old Testament, New Testament, The Book of Mormon, but all I saw were all the holes in them and the hateful men that wrote them. It amazes me that people can read these books with the murder, racism or genocide and sit there smiling about it.

My final day for sure as a Mormon came on my temple wedding day. I thought to myself that this was the day I’d find out, this is supposed to be the day I can be closest to God. After that day I came out pretty much an Atheist. The fact that so much of the teachings are thrown out the window and the hypocrisy from the Church when it came to rituals about other faiths was enough.

I don’t believe that there is a God that we humans visualize anymore. There could be some sort of being of power, but these holy books just keep people in a bubble and I can’t stand it anymore. I love my wife, and my children. I will continue to support my family no matter the choice they make as a father and a husband. I just hope they can do the same for me when they come under the full realization that I’m not a believer anymore. I’m sure my wife knows it, but the words haven’t come out yet. I’ll just hope for the best.