Two more things. I forgot to mention she set up an appointment with the bishop. I'm not going to stop her knowing what I know now. I'm morbidly curious what will come of this, if there will be any Church discipline. Lastly, I just got off the phone with her. Tonight she is being defiant. She apparently told her parents (who knows if she told the whole story), what happened. They said it'
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Yeah, I have the smoking gun. The thing that's so heartbreaking is the kids. Monday we took them to the waterpark and they were having such a good time. Then they dropped me off at the airport. I still remember watching them wave goodbye, without a care in the world I don't even want to picture breaking up their carefree world. They are so young, they live in a bubble and don't realize
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So yesterday I said it would be good for me to be away for a few days to see what happens. Waiting at the airport, I did something I've never done before (as noted above). I pulled up her Facebook account. Creepy ... maybe? But she hedged enough when I asked how I could trust her not to talk to this again that I didn't have a great feeling about things. It turns out she had been messaging the
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She voluntarily "confessed" to me to ease her guilty conscience. I didn't do any searching of her phone to prompt it. Now that my trust was shaken I have done some more digging. I've found some disturbing stuff that I'm trying to come to grips with.
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Sorry "succumbed" means the sin of masturbation. I didn't want her to feel so much guilt and shame. And her hypersexuality is one of the positive aspects of living with her. So things could be worse in that regard. I wonder how the courts look upon someone who has a documented history mental illness including three psychiatric hospitalizations.
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My parents are in the Midwest 1200 miles away. Mother is a TBM, father is not. My brother lives in Costa Rica and has left the Church. My sister lives in Alaska and is TBM. So no one close from my side. My family all really like and support her, but aren't blind to the challenges.
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Ok. Got to vent. If your tired of this sorry and please move on. But she just got back from a visit to her LDS therapist, after setting up an emergency appointment. By way of background, I had previously forwarded a John Dehlin podcast where he interviewed a therapist about healthy vs unhealthy sexuality in the Church. The therapist was very clear that her position on some things were at odd
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So on the one hand, she voluntarily told me about this and voluntarily stopped it before it got too far. On the other, as someone pointed out, pretty damning to contact someone after two years had passed. It took a level of pre-meditation. But yes, I'm mad at her too. My biggest concern is the kids -- I have to make 100% sure I would get custody. Our court system is pretty messed up in ter
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Thanks. You are spot on regarding what could potentially happen. It's a pattern I've seen several times now. One more clarification, she has always had consistent appointments with a psychiatrist. Right now at least monthly. That's at my insistence over her parents' disapproval. Basically she's caught between their spiritual healing only paradigm, and my insistence on professional treatment.
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Thanks for the kind words. One clarification. She was in the hospital 2 years ago. Now two years later she took it upon herself to look him up and start texting.
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No the Bishop doesn't know I don't believe. That's my business and not his. I don't know if it would help or hurt, but it frustrates me that some untrained random male is the first person she feels like she should talk too
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To clarify -- he was a fellow patient. Apparently an Iraq war vet with PTSD. I don't care what kind of PTSD he has. Totally over the line to try to hook up with married fellow patients.
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As I've been pretty open, she has bipolar. For the last 6 months or so, she has been more on the manic side. That means in general she is easier to live with (as long as it doesn't get extreme), but it also means she is more impulsive with spending, sex, activities etc. Anyway, about three weeks ago, she texted this guy she met during her last psychiatric hospitalization. Great place to mee
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You may have worked for, or heard of a company, that will match employee charitable contributions up to a certain point. I used to work for a company that did this. Anyway, I heard of someone recently who was using this company policy to match on the tithing he was paying to the LDS Church. All I could think of when I heard about this was "ugh". 100% sure the company's policy w
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A guy on Facebook posted that he hopes the Church sets up a special fund to raise money to restore the Houston temple from it's flood damage.
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For me it would have to be the "vision" that my father-in-law had when giving my wife a blessing. In the vision, he saw two more kids in the pre-existence waiting for us. The ridiculous thing was, my wife was getting a blessing to deal with her unstable moods due to bipolar. Anyone with an ounce of common sense would have known that pressuring her to have more kids was not what s
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In the ever-objective Deseret News. http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865687100/Chiasmus-a-columnist-and-conviction-in-the-Book-of-Mormon.html I do remember hearing about how amazing it was that Hebrew Chiasmus was in the BOM while in the MTC. In seriosness is there any objective research into the existence of Chiasmus in the BOM?
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I do too. But at least I can see humor/irony in the culture.
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For an 8-year-old nephew along with another kid. The Primary president gave a talk about how great it was that they had learned about Jesus and had made the decision to follow his example and get baptized. Has an 8-year-old ever made the decision not to get baptized if their parents were encouraging it? Seems doubtful.
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We got a new bishopric a couple weeks ago. I guess I should have known because the Stake Presidency was all present, and this one guy who ended up being called as counselor showed up clean-shaven (to emulate Jesus who was clean-shaven I guess). Anyway, I happened to look over at the current executive secretary. Now I have no way of knowing what exactly was going through his head. But to m
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I appreciate the thoughts. Let's face it. The Church will be around a long time. If it would back off some of its extreme views the people left attending would be better off. Maybe people wouldn't be so trapped with unbearably orthodox family members.
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It was Elder Hugo Martinez. Trying to be objective, English is his second language so maybe something didn't come across as he intended. But he did say it.
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We had stake conference this morning. Most of it was the typical snoozefest (literally for me) of family history, hold to the rod, obey the prophets etc. But the visiting GA made one cringe-worthy statement. He told a story of when he lost his car keys at a fair full of hundreds of people. Concerned, he had the thought that "Some of these people have to be Latter-day Saints, so maybe o
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Funny you say that. I'm on a plane about to leave Salt Lake. There are about 20 missionaries on board. I can't believe I was once in their spot. While my mission was not a bad experience, I had no perspective on the world. It seemed so normal because it was what I was fed 24-7. They seem so exploited.
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About a missionary finding his wayward, prodigal older brother. http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865685840/Elder-Holland-withdraws-Church-News-missionary-story.html I realize that people make mistakes, and it could have been an honest mistake. If it was, kudos for correcting the error. But a few things stick out to me. First, I love how the Deseret News quotes an ethics expert about
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Was following another online discussion when someone posted this from Spencer W. Kimball: “Kissing has been prostituted and has degenerated to develop and express lust instead of affection, honor and admiration. To kiss in casual dating is asking for trouble. What do kisses mean when handed out like pretzels and robbed of sacredness?” “Even if timely courtship justifies the kiss, it s
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My wife is listening to FM100 Soft Sunday Sounds. The theme of at least 75% of the songs is "Lord, lift me up through my trials and inadequacy." Then of the remaining 25%, half the songs are MoTab, which sounds like a funeral march. As shallow and repetitive as Christian rock is (in my limited exposure) at least those songs are mostly along the lines of "Praise and Glory to Hi
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Yep ... thanks to everyone for all the insights. She does have bipolar. She's been doing well for the past several months, which is a good thing. It probably won't last forever, but for now we can enjoy when things are good. I do agree her situation makes it more difficult to share everything given her sometimes unpredictable reactions. Still I don't completely feel comfortable keeping a
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I'm traveling for work this week. Today I had just a sip of Ice Tea. I'm not sure even why. Mostly it was because I wanted try it. However, I 100% know that my wife would freak out if she knew about it. It was literally an ounce or less. Not "toeing the line" isn't completely new. I (gasp) sometimes watch R-rated movies on the airplane if it's a show I want to see. I look for ex
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I know some people who can't relax until they get all the "to do's" done. I was that way for quite a while. Monday Night FHE -- Check. Family Prayer -- Check Morning Prayer -- Check Evening Prayer -- Check. Personal Scripture Reading -- Check Temple Attendance -- Check Home teaching -- Check Church Calling -- Check Sacrament Meeting-- Check Sunday School -- Check Priesthoo
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