"I've learned the only one I can depend on is me, so I have to learn to treat myself like I'm worth something." Excellent advice.
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Excellent video! One of the best ‘Why I left the Mormon church’ videos ever. Speaking extemporaneously, calmly and honestly, Harris focuses on the damaging psychological effect of the church on members. Some quotes (preceded by the time stamps) to which many of us can relate: 13:04 “I came to understand that I had some deep problems and anger toward the church and what it instill
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Excellent points. Thank you for clarifying.
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“Conference”: A meeting in which no conferring whatsoever occurs. “Conference” (online definitions): 1. A meeting for consultation or discussion 2. An exchange of views Mormon meaning of “Conference”: A meeting in which members sit impassively while being lectured to and harangued by church leaders.
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“Troublemaker: Surviving Hollywood and Scientology” by Leah Remini is a great resource for learning the truth about scientology. As has happened with many of us exmos, Leah was a sincere believer going along with things that to an outsider clearly appear wrong… until she stumbled across some awful truths about scientology that shocked her and angered her. She felt overwhelmingly betra
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“Fails All Intelligent Research” –funny and accurate!
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Suggestion: Read books by Bible historian Bart Ehrman, who focuses on the history of how the Bible was put together. Ehrman had the integrity to give objectivity priority over the results he had expected to find. The books he wrote are the result. Titles of two of the books, as a suggested place to start: Jesus, Interrupted: Revealing the hidden contradictions in the Bible (and why
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Neither state your beliefs to your grandmother nor defend them. Too many exmos find out the hard way that such approaches fall upon deaf ears! Instead, if/when Grandma scolds you, smile affectionately and say, “I am very clear about your feelings on this matter.” This respectfully allows your grandmother her point of view without requiring any agreement with it on your part. If Grandm
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Your stated intention in reappearing at church even though you have resigned: “I attended church again for a few months just to see old friends.” But… How Mormons understand your reappearance at Church: “Oh, look! The Spirit has been working on luvlyldy to bring her back to the One True Church. Isn’t that wonderful! LET’S BE SURE TO LOVE BOMB HER until she comes back for good!
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“Too bad for the kids that went there because of their low IQ parents sending them there.” Yes, but this was not the only possible scenario. Some gay young men (and like SL Cabbie indicated, a few young women as well) had been programmed, by the LDS church and society, to feel such overwhelming shame that they WANTED to be “cured”, just to fit in. Some bishops, especially those outsi
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News article on this very topic, if you can stomach reading it: https://www.qsaltlake.com/news/2020/02/01/byu-electro-shock-therapy-doctor-dies-the-day-before-utahs-ban-on-lgbtq-conversion-therapy-goes-into-effect/ Excerpts: “Former Brigham Young University psychologist Dr. Robert Duane Card, who put many LDS gay men through horrific electro-shock aversion therapy to “rid them of their
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Over the years, many RMs have said how they hated proselytizing and tracting; that they would have preferred giving full-time community service to the places they were assigned, instead. Did anyone here actually enjoy proselytizing and tracting when they were missionaries?
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'Heartless' is correct. In further support: A (living) convert's membership is considered to begin not on the date of his or her baptism, but from the date of his or her confirmation.
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“Ex husband, I am NOT your therapist. Go talk to a therapist. “That is all I have to say. Good-bye.” And hang up!
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START LAUGHING! Do not engage by bringing up and defending your (far more rational) views. Instead, when he starts up with “Joseph Smith blah blah blah” start LAUGHING at the absurdity of Mormon beliefs! With a chuckle and a dismissive wave of the hand, say something like this: “If you want to believe that tripe, go right ahead; but don’t expect me to join you in it!” Shake y
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Your attendance, obedience, free labor (“calling”), sex life, and tithing, certainly mattered to church leaders; but did you feel YOU mattered to them?
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But TSCC seldom reminds members of this, so most members and exmos are not aware of this option. Furthermore, even whether or not a “First Presidency” group of three is to be appointed, and a “Quorum of the Twelve” presiding, also must be agreed upon! Below is an excerpt from an LDS newsroom article entitled “Succession in the Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day S
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…brings missionaries home early (due to the coronavirus situation)? If a young missionary has, for example, 3 months remaining on his mission when the church brings him home, then wouldn’t the parents get to keep the last 3 months’ worth of fees? Does anyone know how this is being handled?
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Where is the so-called “power of the Priesthood”? Wouldn’t this be an obvious time to *use* that power, if Mormon priesthood holders truly had it?!
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Rich Middle School in Laketown, Utah adopted a policy abolishing a child’s right to say “no” when asked to dance. At the recent Valentine’s day dance, a girl was asked to dance by a boy who made her uncomfortable. The girl politely responded “No, thank you,” only to have the principal intervene and insist, “shooing” the two onto the dance floor. When the girl got home, she
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Your children and/or in-laws, like nearly all Mormons, have been successfully fully programmed by TSCC to see you as a non-person unless you confess your wayward ways and shamefully slink back to the One True Church. There is NO opening on their side, no desire on their part to understand any other point of view. You wrote, “If the desired outcome is not possible, maybe I need to stop stres
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Tell the truth, the *whole* truth, and nothing but the truth, regarding Mormon history, doctrines, beliefs, and practices, past and current. Or in Mormon terms: Be honest in all their dealings. Do what is right, let the consequence follow.
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You fulfilled your Christmas promises to them. Now, shouldn't they fulfill some Christmas promises to you?
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Not sure about the crying babies and toddlers. From the article: "The Saturday evening session will be for all Latter-day Saints ages 11 and up."
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You have a point. At the same time, Elizabeth may have in mind giving hope to survivors of abuse of all types. That Elizabeth has gone on to have a seemingly happy marriage and family, after all she went through, is indeed inspiring and may well give hope to others.
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Yes, this! ^^^
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Actually, there are 10 temples without a Moroni statue: http://www.ldsliving.com/Why-the-Paris-France-Temple-Doesn-t-Have-an-Angel-Moroni/s/83646 “The Paris France Temple will become one of 10 temples that do not have an angel Moroni statue (St. George Utah, Logan Utah, Manti Utah, Laie Hawaii, Cardston Alberta, Mesa Arizona, Hamilton New Zealand, Oakland California, and Kinshasa Democrat
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The problem with “the slow fade” is that any sign that you and/or your wife are acting differently or participating less than before tends to raise suspicion. Then the bishop may wish to “talk” with you (or your wife) in order to check out the status of your testimony (i.e. to see if you are questioning the church) in hopes of shaming you into staying. Since you are feeling major guilt
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A couple of years after I joined, I had great respect for the young missionaries in my ward. To assist “the two best years of their lives”, I decided to be sure to talk with them and to get to know them a bit. But then, just as they and I reached a nice rapport… they were transferred. The next assigned pair showed up. I again made an effort to talk with them and help them feel welcome
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Suppose it really is the same person, who now wishes to leave that part of her past behind. Your choice is either to shame her and disempower her by letting her know that you are aware of her past, or to support her in moving forward in her life by saying nothing about this to anyone ever and by always treating her respectfully. What do you choose?
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