Dividing the number of congregations into the total membership gives you 548 member per congregation . . .
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The Freak Show in my head is sufficient for my needs...
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The head flight attendant who made the decision to remove the buxom (I hope) passenger will hold a press conference on Monday since that is not a temple day for her, and she has made arrangements for someone else to prepare that evening's Family Home Evening program ...
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It would be quite the spectacle if he attended, but didn't speak, just sat there for all the sessions ... except at the end, someone would bring out a 2¼'x6¼' box and put it on his lap. Then Rusty would reach in and hold up one 2'x6' sign after another, each one with the name of a city (or country) that is getting a brand new temple. The buzz would get increasingly louder until he pulled ou
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I think it's all about acne...
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RPackham Wrote: -------------------- > elderolddog Wrote: > ------------------ > >   Bruh! > >    And then RPackham asked: > ?? > def? I don't claim any familiarity with the word, nor how 'the kids' use it.  But I've noticed on Reddit, it's used A LOT, and the users and abusers all seem to be fine with it; I've never seen a user 'corrected.' Is
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One "attribute" of mormonism that I hung on to for way too long was the notion that it is perfectly acceptable for someone from the church to show up, unannounced, at your door after 8:00 PM, with a message, and you don't think anything odd of it.
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. . .I'm still making payments.  Sure, NOW I know not to refi...
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I believe in the duplicity of mankind; it will never let you down nor will it stop surprising you.
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I'd love to have them announce ten or fifteen 2nd Annoyings based on drawing from a big box with all the seat numbers in it... Then the SLTrib could follow up with individual stories about all the 'sins' the winners commited in the weeks following their 2nd Annoyings!!
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The verses condemn Lamanites who seem to be faithful, like showing up weekly at church and MIA, blessing the Snackerment, perfect attendence at early AM seminary, etc., but still haven't turned White!
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What happens if they catch an RM with a 6-pack of O'Doul's?
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Maybe there is something to the notion of celestial inspiration!!
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Or even better, getting a selfie of you and the eclipse hanging out together!! Here's the thing:  eclipses are as predictable as sunrises and sunsets.  They're just a tad less common. Absolutely NOTHING is gained by loading a personal memory of "seeing" an eclipse into your memory, but there will exist an opportunity to 'injure' one or both of your eyeballs. For some
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So...366 April Fools days for 2024?
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But isn't it somewhat amazing that the church hasn't published anything about what can happen to bad people who wear good garments?
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It was the quavering in your voice that sold it!
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Get there late, leave early; enjoy the blessings of being "kinda active."
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What's the penalty for wearing garments when you're not "entitled" to?
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April 6 is Jesus's birthday...  I figured this thread was close enough for me to get away with the following: Good Friday has fallen on April 6 in previous years, including 2007 and 2012... So, in 2007 and 2012, Jesus got to celebrate both his B-day and crucifixion at the same party! How does one dress for such an occasion, and does Jesus get one or two presents?
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How much would you pay for a 4" tall cross made out of specially compressed Utah cricket 'remains' with a beautiful and tasteful gold necklace, both blessed by the First Presidency? What if you could get it for half-price if you can pass a temple recommend interview? I heard a story while on my mission about a faithful ward in Argentina, during WWII.  I can't say that I recall th
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An independent woman doesn't necessarily annoy the brethren if she's independently following the gospel path.  It's the women (no matter what adjective you lead with) who won't conform to the mormon mold, who think for themselves, and who won't kiss the priesthood's butt. Next thing you know, some woman's gonna say she got a revelation!
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> What about "It's made up > but it's still true."? I think that it's a human fascination to think to yourself, "Yeah, I made this up . . ., but it could be TRUE...and SHOULD be true!!!" This presupposes that humans are susceptible to the notion that "Truths exist," and all you have to do is find them. Here's a list of possible "self-evi
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Tie-dyed garments from the 1960s!!    Peace out, temple goers!!!
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...only the Black ones...
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I was taught that William Law complained about Emma Smith trying to talk him into having sex with her...
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1)  Open crotch 2)  Insert priesthood 3)  Repeat for eternity Pardon my fascination with reproduction... I'm sure it's hearsay, but I've heard about a lab rat experiment where they wired a rat's 'pleasure center' so that when a lever was pressed, the 'pleasure center' got a nice jolt. The rat was then introduced into a cage with two 'levers.'  One lever, when pressed,
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