I spoke to my mom this morning and told her about the incident where the 12 year-old girl was asked if she had practiced bestiality. My mother agrees this is abuse (my mom used to be an ex-mo and then got rebaptized). My mom told me that when she married my dad the Bishop asked her if she would put back on her garments after having sex, he asked her about anal and oral intercourse and whether she and my dad practiced them. She didn't even know what they were at age 24 when she was asked these things (yes, she was that naive). She said this made her very uncomfortable and still bothers her.

Later this afternoon I spoke to TBM DW and TBM DD about the bestiality interview. My wife said if a Bishop ever asks one of the kids that or describes bestiality, masturbation, or any other sexual activity to one of our minor children, she will report the Bishop to DCFS.

I told 15 year-old DD that she has a right to get up and leave the interview if the Bishop ever asks her anything that makes her uncomfortable. She agreed that she will and DW was 100% behind me on it.

I can rarely have conversations with my wife about TSCC because she usually shuts me right down. In this case, she did not, it really bothered her. I told her and DD that I think their Bishop is a good man and I would never suspect him of doing this but affirmed to them that I was constantly harrassed about masturbation and once asked about homosexuality (by a SP) when I was growing up. I told them that this caused me to be afraid of women, become introverted, and basically have no social life with the opposite sex growing up. After this, DW said, "Okay, enough, now you're attacking the church."

Still, I feel like I made some progress and got the idea in their heads. I feel good about this.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/24/2013 06:06PM by budweiserbaby.

I feel like a narcissist for topping this, but I'd like some feedback. :)

Good for you for standing up for your children and explaining to them it's ok to walk out of an inappropriate conversation! Sure wish my parents had done that.

It's good that your wife is on board. Very fortunate.

I'm not an "ex" (yet), but am doing lots of research. Would you please post the link to the bestiality interview?

As for comments on this, I'm glad you were able to discuss something with your wife about the church. I wish that I had known these kinds of questions were asked by Bishops in their interviews with the youth. I may have done something about it when my children were that age. OTOH, my husband was a Bishop and I have no idea if he asked these same questions.

Here's the link:

http://zelophehadsdaughters.com/2013/06/01/lions-and-tigers-and-bears-oh-my/

I thought all LDS bishops asked about masturbation because, without fail, I was asked this in every single worthiness interview as a youth. I grew up in wards in Salt Lake City and Provo. I was also asked this by a Branch President in the MTC and two different Mission Presidents on my mission. I was never asked about bestiality. I was asked about homosexuality once, when I was 18, by a Stake President.

My daughter has told me that all her bishop asks is whether or not she's living the law of chastity. You're going to get some True Believer Mormons arguing that this does not happen because it's not consistent across the board.

I also would like to mention, I have a friend who's wife was asked specific details about pre-maritial sex to which she had confessed to a previous ecclesiastical leader in the LDS church. She told the Bishop that it had already been resovled and it was none of his business. She felt that the bishop was simply trying to get some sort of sexual thrill out of it. So, I think it depends on the leader.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/24/2013 07:52PM by budweiserbaby.

and daughter listened. I think the ability to set boundaries is huge when it comes to breaking free from controllers (like the church).