So I have a returned missionary TBM roommate and last night we were talking. He brought up how he has a lot of gay friends, and one of his gay buddies' confessed his love for him last night. (side note: even though I knew hes is TBM, I thought my roommate was gay when I met him) My roommate obviously said no and he wants to remain friends and he went on to blatantly say that he believes God doesn't like the choices homosexuals make, and that he believes there is some element of "choice" behind homosexuals' motives and feelings.

He knows that I am no longer a member of the cult, and so we began arguing over this. I told him I was disgusted that he worships a God that punishes and discriminates against his own children simply because of who they are. My roommate tried to rebuttal this by saying he "knows" there is an element of choice behind why gay people choose to be gay, because he said that in high school and before his mission, he thought he was attracted to men, but he talked with his bishop and "chose" to begin liking girls, therefore he believes that all homosexuals have the ability to "change" if they want.

I argued that homosexuals don't want to change who they are, they just want to be accepted and live normal lives like the rest of us without religious bigots accusing them and treating them as second class citizens simply because of who they love. I told him that homosexuals have absolute zero effect on people; it's not like they are murderers, or child molesters, or anything. The only reasoning he could come up with that homosexuals are "bad" was that they spread AIDS. I told him that it doesn't matter if you're gay or straight, people spread diseases no matter what. You just have to be safe about it.

It just really pissed me off and made me sick that this asshole really believes that gay people "choose" their actions. Why would someone want to choose to be discriminated against? His gay friends even tell him there is absolutely no choice involved in being gay. My roommate doesn't believe them. It makes me sick. Sorry, I just had to vent. I'm not a good arguer or debater, which sucks because I just wanted to shut him down in this argument. But, God never loses, so there is no way his brainwashed little mind can comprehend anything "ungodly".

Oh, and then we started arguing about the masonic temple rituals, the young earth theory, and other stuff. Like I said, I'm not a good debater, so he kept on coming up with apologetic, mental gymnastic responses. I guess that just proves I need to brush up on my arguing skills.

rallychild Wrote:
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> The only reasoning he could come up with that homosexuals are "bad" was that they spread AIDS.

In Africa, AIDS is a heterosexual disease. Does this make heterosexuals bad?

All I can say is that sometimes people have to learn things the hard way. If your roomie was attracted to young men in high school, then he can deny all he wants to, but it's just a matter of time.

But he'll keep being attracted to men he finds attractive even if he can find women attractive too.

What's a young TBM to do? lol

that only takes care of 50% of his problem.

+1

He should just accept the fact that he IS gay.

It sounds like he's trying to convince himself that it's really a choice, to confirm that his talk with the bishop and his "choice" really made a difference.

Maybe you should ask him, "When did you decide to be straight?"

Also, if this "person" thinks gays can change, ask him if he is willing to change as well.

Point out that many of the religious and political leaders who are very vocal about homosexuality being bad have turned out to be homosexual.

Say that he needs to understand himself, and why he is against it. Is it that his community has said this is bad? or that he does not want to be an outsider in his community? (avoid the hypocrite call... he should see that from the first point.)

He may seek you out sometime in the future simply because he knows you accept gays as they are (and him too). Don't worry that he argued with you. He needs support and is reaching out and hiding not too deeply in the closet. Ya done good.

As gay as handbag full of rainbows. And if you already thought he was gay when you met him, he's probably as camp as a row of tents. But he'll have to walk this alone.

Without the religion, he would probably already be in his bisexual stage, as in "bi now, gay later".



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/05/2011 04:27PM by Zeno Lorea.

Hate their church

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Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 02/05/2011 01:52AM by taddlywog.

Sad, sad, sad. Thinking of all my gay friends, classmates and colleagues, I could never imagine accusing them of making a choice about their sexuality. They are who they are and they love who they love, and frankly even if it WAS a choice, it wouldn't matter because it doesn't affect my life or my happiness in any way.

I had a high school classmate who sounds a lot like this. I went to Catholic school, a very liberal one at that, where we had a gay-straight alliance and a super accepting community (save for one curmudgeon principal). Many of my peers were out and proud, some were out to their friends but not to their conservative parents who they knew would reject them, and then there was one.. closeted and frankly, red-hot flaming gay. It was absolutely one of those situations where EVERYONE knew but him. He was a republican, log-cabin, gay-hating closeted dude. Lo and behold, he goes to college in DC and finally figures it out. So as crazy frustrating as this guy is, I would wait and see. And you'll get better in your arguing skills, but don't stress yourself out trying to argue with a guy who thinks God is on his side and that he can't be wrong because The Lard told him so. Religious doublespeak is all smoke and mirrors, and he might think it sounds super intellectual when it's just garbage!!! Good job standing up for what you know is the kind thing to do in the best way you know how.