Recovery Board
: RfM
Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum.
I would rather be yelled at than censored (I will not return your anger) but if censoring this post is necessary, I offer it for the admin's (and members') approval.
I would like to propose a church, preferably in a way that will not get me kicked off this board. I totally appreciate that it's the last thing a number of people would be interested in, and I'm not trying to sell the idea to them. No, really, it's not that important.
The LDS church would call this church heretical, perhaps even evil. I would merely call it "Apostate."
I would like to propose a church specifically for Ex-Mormons. To be fair, no one would be required to first join the LDS church to join ours.
This church does not yet exist, and if no one wants it to, it never will.
The church would be founded on The Articles of Sanity:
1. We are not required to believe anything silly, but we are welcome to, and people will try to afford some fair and reasonable level of respect, provided that we do not thrust it too overzealously onto others, which is frowned upon. We have one cardinal sin: to put your foot in someone's door.
2. Because of Article 1, though some of us may believe that people are sometimes divinely inspired, we are not required to believe that, because look what happens when we are.
3. We love families of all kinds, because no sane person ever told us not to.
4. We're human, and imperfect, but given the amount of hypocrisy we've endured as a matter of faith, we aim a little more than average to be less hypocritical, if humanly possible.
5. We tend towards monogamy, or at least unwed fornication, and if there are any polygamists in our numbers then we're certainly not telling them to do that as part of our faith. We had to make that clear or some people would get us confused.
6. We're not all convinced that God really cares about your sexuality though. It's a tired cliche that would probably confuse the heck out of Jesus if he returned (we're not speaking for him, we're just guessing.)
7. Prophecy is for individuals, and our unpaid clergy are not chosen by God, or by birth. It's fine to listen to prophecy and all, but don't let someone run your life because of a cheap magician's trick like: "Read this book and ask God if it's true, and you'll get a warm feeling." We've been there, it's sad. Take everything with a grain of salt, no one's asking you to be a cynic, but at least try to be reasonable.
8. We can only be an Apostate once. If one of us leaves us, and goes back to one of the other Mormon churches or something, we're not going to call them an "Apostate Apostate." That would be getting much too close to abandoning Article 1.
9. We should have mentioned it sooner, but tithing is optional and transparent. There ought to be some kind of guard for the privacy of the needy, but we will strive to outdo any other church in letting people know where their tithing money is going, preferably before it is even offered.
10. We started this church because all or most of us were drawn to the LDS life at one point, and wanted to reconstruct some of the things that drew us to it. We are Brothers and Sisters who loved Mankind in our hearts, and were let down by a church that proved a little less than Divine. Then again, when you read about how the church was formed, that shouldn't be all that surprising at this point. Oh well, at least we have each other.
11. We still believe in a better world than this, whether in another dimension, on another planet, or maybe even here and now. We live to share that dream, in a slightly more down-to-earth way than we've had opportunity to in the past.
Also, singing is optional. Really, really optional. You can't even get away from singing in the Unitarian churches, already. What would people sing? Eh, let them sing if they want to sing. Sing with them if you want to sing with them, or just sit and listen, or have some coffee or whatever.
Plus we are sorry to report that we're fresh out of uniform underwear. We are strictly a BYU (Bring Your-own Underwear) church now.
A preferable name for this church would be "The LDS Church, Apostate," or "LDSA" for short. If you feel a need to register your religion on some document, feel free to register "Ex-Mormon," but that's only a thought.
And no, this isn't a joke, but as many of us have learned, life is too short to belong to a church with no sense of humor. Or perhaps, any church at all. It's just a thought.
I would like to propose a church, preferably in a way that will not get me kicked off this board. I totally appreciate that it's the last thing a number of people would be interested in, and I'm not trying to sell the idea to them. No, really, it's not that important.
The LDS church would call this church heretical, perhaps even evil. I would merely call it "Apostate."
I would like to propose a church specifically for Ex-Mormons. To be fair, no one would be required to first join the LDS church to join ours.
This church does not yet exist, and if no one wants it to, it never will.
The church would be founded on The Articles of Sanity:
1. We are not required to believe anything silly, but we are welcome to, and people will try to afford some fair and reasonable level of respect, provided that we do not thrust it too overzealously onto others, which is frowned upon. We have one cardinal sin: to put your foot in someone's door.
2. Because of Article 1, though some of us may believe that people are sometimes divinely inspired, we are not required to believe that, because look what happens when we are.
3. We love families of all kinds, because no sane person ever told us not to.
4. We're human, and imperfect, but given the amount of hypocrisy we've endured as a matter of faith, we aim a little more than average to be less hypocritical, if humanly possible.
5. We tend towards monogamy, or at least unwed fornication, and if there are any polygamists in our numbers then we're certainly not telling them to do that as part of our faith. We had to make that clear or some people would get us confused.
6. We're not all convinced that God really cares about your sexuality though. It's a tired cliche that would probably confuse the heck out of Jesus if he returned (we're not speaking for him, we're just guessing.)
7. Prophecy is for individuals, and our unpaid clergy are not chosen by God, or by birth. It's fine to listen to prophecy and all, but don't let someone run your life because of a cheap magician's trick like: "Read this book and ask God if it's true, and you'll get a warm feeling." We've been there, it's sad. Take everything with a grain of salt, no one's asking you to be a cynic, but at least try to be reasonable.
8. We can only be an Apostate once. If one of us leaves us, and goes back to one of the other Mormon churches or something, we're not going to call them an "Apostate Apostate." That would be getting much too close to abandoning Article 1.
9. We should have mentioned it sooner, but tithing is optional and transparent. There ought to be some kind of guard for the privacy of the needy, but we will strive to outdo any other church in letting people know where their tithing money is going, preferably before it is even offered.
10. We started this church because all or most of us were drawn to the LDS life at one point, and wanted to reconstruct some of the things that drew us to it. We are Brothers and Sisters who loved Mankind in our hearts, and were let down by a church that proved a little less than Divine. Then again, when you read about how the church was formed, that shouldn't be all that surprising at this point. Oh well, at least we have each other.
11. We still believe in a better world than this, whether in another dimension, on another planet, or maybe even here and now. We live to share that dream, in a slightly more down-to-earth way than we've had opportunity to in the past.
Also, singing is optional. Really, really optional. You can't even get away from singing in the Unitarian churches, already. What would people sing? Eh, let them sing if they want to sing. Sing with them if you want to sing with them, or just sit and listen, or have some coffee or whatever.
Plus we are sorry to report that we're fresh out of uniform underwear. We are strictly a BYU (Bring Your-own Underwear) church now.
A preferable name for this church would be "The LDS Church, Apostate," or "LDSA" for short. If you feel a need to register your religion on some document, feel free to register "Ex-Mormon," but that's only a thought.
And no, this isn't a joke, but as many of us have learned, life is too short to belong to a church with no sense of humor. Or perhaps, any church at all. It's just a thought.
#8 could really use some minor grammatical dressing-up, but I'm pretty happy with it otherwise. I've visited the old Ex-Mormon forums before (never posted) and I don't -think- this will make anyone mad, but I'd hate to see it go.
Just the word 'church' seems to give me hives these days. I guess there are folks who have been part of a church their entire lives, and would rather have an alternative, than nothing at all.
But for myself, I never want to be a part of an organized anything, ever again. I must belong to my company, in order to support myself, or have my own company. But that's my business life. For my personal life, I'll just stick with hanging out one-on-one with my friends, or in small get-togethers. No more joining anything for me.
But for myself, I never want to be a part of an organized anything, ever again. I must belong to my company, in order to support myself, or have my own company. But that's my business life. For my personal life, I'll just stick with hanging out one-on-one with my friends, or in small get-togethers. No more joining anything for me.
Would you allow marrying 14 year olds.......????
Add coffee before services and childcare by folks who have been background checked and I'm in!
Oh raptorjesus, we know you went extinct for our sins. It's twoo.
You're goddamned right I did. Now spread the word!
Spread it!!!
Spread it!!!
LMexmoAO! I love your dirty, dirty mind and your double entendres, RJ. You are masterful and fill me with the spirit!
And I'm sure they wouldn't mind if you don't choose to sing. They are about as open minded as a religion can be, espousing no dogma, and allowing you to basically believe whatever you want. They even have the occasional atheist special guest speaker!
I think I will have to go for New Order Catholic. I want an "earth mother."
"if it's real, we believe in it"
lol
lol
Sorry. I’m a budding Pastafarian. Just waiting to get “sauced” to seal the deal.
Yours would be my second choice if the FSM lets me down, but that will never happen.
Yours would be my second choice if the FSM lets me down, but that will never happen.
On Pastafarianism: I've attended LDS sermons where they explained that all religions "have some truth." That's as true of Pastafarianism as any religion, I'm sure.
I even partook of the Holy Meal this evening. It's not a Friday, but I'm not exactly Orthodox, just a, what does LDS call it again? Oh right, "Investigator!" I "investigate" as many faiths as I can. And may you (AmI,)always feel the touch of His Noodly Appendage, Ramen!
The Loose Canon is a lovely bit of scripture. When you complete it, it is polite to belch softly with reverence and say:
"I can't believe I read the Whole Thing!" I'd sooner read it in full again than the BoM, but I may have opened the BoM one time too many. It definitely loses some of its charm when you realize why you were expected to read it.
As for marrying 14 year olds, I'll pass, and I strongly doubt it's a good idea for 14 year olds to marry anyone at all. I certainly wouldn't recommend it.
I even partook of the Holy Meal this evening. It's not a Friday, but I'm not exactly Orthodox, just a, what does LDS call it again? Oh right, "Investigator!" I "investigate" as many faiths as I can. And may you (AmI,)always feel the touch of His Noodly Appendage, Ramen!
The Loose Canon is a lovely bit of scripture. When you complete it, it is polite to belch softly with reverence and say:
"I can't believe I read the Whole Thing!" I'd sooner read it in full again than the BoM, but I may have opened the BoM one time too many. It definitely loses some of its charm when you realize why you were expected to read it.
As for marrying 14 year olds, I'll pass, and I strongly doubt it's a good idea for 14 year olds to marry anyone at all. I certainly wouldn't recommend it.
I can't see myself joining the Church of Reality. They are too often limited by the plausible, and I am not. Besides, I don't believe in looking down on religious thinkers before they look down on me first.
It's not that I don't believe there is *A Truth* that is universal. There might be, for all I know. I am simply wary of anyone that claims to have it, which is what the Church of Reality (by definition) seems to claim. Finding the essence of reality will take forever. Seeking it openly is something anyone can do, whether they feel they have found it already or not. I am more of an agnostic than an atheist, but I accept both as reasonable perspectives. I've tried both of them myself.
(I think I do like their politics, however.)
Also, I don't put too much stress on "separating ourselves from the animals." That may be one of our greater faults, and we may have underestimated animals somewhat. There may be a day when (like with gorillas,) we and bears understand each other to a point where they don't maul us. I won't be trying that at home, but the Church of Reality's version of reality is different than, and importantly probably not accepting of, my own. I'll look into it further, I don't prefer to speak out of ignorance.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/05/2011 08:59PM by joesmyth.
It's not that I don't believe there is *A Truth* that is universal. There might be, for all I know. I am simply wary of anyone that claims to have it, which is what the Church of Reality (by definition) seems to claim. Finding the essence of reality will take forever. Seeking it openly is something anyone can do, whether they feel they have found it already or not. I am more of an agnostic than an atheist, but I accept both as reasonable perspectives. I've tried both of them myself.
(I think I do like their politics, however.)
Also, I don't put too much stress on "separating ourselves from the animals." That may be one of our greater faults, and we may have underestimated animals somewhat. There may be a day when (like with gorillas,) we and bears understand each other to a point where they don't maul us. I won't be trying that at home, but the Church of Reality's version of reality is different than, and importantly probably not accepting of, my own. I'll look into it further, I don't prefer to speak out of ignorance.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/05/2011 08:59PM by joesmyth.