Laying in bed tonight thinking about many things. Now 3 am, trying to sleep since 1. Tomorrow I think I will tell my TBM father I requested name removal. Maybe I wont, maybe I will. I think I won't. He has shown me before that he does not accept any discussion contrary to his view of the world.
Bloody church, I am frustrated that it frustrates me so much. Why can't I just press delete and have it removed from me? Excised like the cancer it is. I know it is a part of me, it dictated my development from childhood through puberty and early manhood.
Though academically I know it false, I still have foolish doubts upon occasion. So conditioned have I been. Can anyone relate?
We who can throw off the chains of this church are of the same stock as those who rise to overthrow and defy corrupt governments and oppressors. We are, then, in good company.
I have learned many things of social control from this. Vastly not enough people challenge the norm.