Today was the first time I have missed a wedding since resigning. I am filled with more regret that my DIL was not able to have her parents attend her & my son's wedding last year.

When I see movies with weddings, I wish the kids could have had such beautiful weddings with all the family.

I also found it very interesting at the reception, DW's family would hug me, and give me a shoulder rub. I felt they were all checking for garmies.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/19/2011 10:07PM by nomomoses.

freak them out by wearing a garment top or other top. When I was first inactive, I'd wear just a garment top to church so people who gave me the garment-feel-up would have their minds messed with.

Then it just wasn't worth it... But it would be if I were at a wedding like that. And I agree with you about beautiful family wedding ceremonies v. the cold, chanted, church-centered Mormon temple ceremony. I'm soooo glad my kids will have a nice wedding.

Yeah. My good friend just got sealed in the Mesa temple today (although she's been married for like 5 years now). Me leaving the church has caused a huge rift in our friendship. It's sad. I'm trying to be happy for her with her choice, but I just can't right now. The wounds are too fresh. So I didn't go.

ETA: I feel guilty saying this but I am kinda happy it pored down rain like crazy today and they couldn't get pictures in front of the temple and they fly back home tomorrow. Haha. I know, I know, I'm terrible.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/19/2011 10:18PM by goldenrule.

I'm a bit guilty for that too. It snowed on the wedding party as they tried to get pictures. I guess they didn't pray hard enough. Or their god doesn't like those that got married today.

When my daughter got married I was still a member, just not a full tither, so waited outside. I didn't think it would be a real big deal because I knew what I was NOT missing and had focused on the reception as being the actual celebration. But I was surprised how hard it was. I think that was because I saw people walking in with them who were and still are just horrible excuses of a human being but because they paid their dues, they were "worthy."

But the good thing is that the absurdity of that day and the stupidity of the practice of excluding people from weddings is one of the big things that got my daughter to scrutinize the church and then start studying the doctrine and history. In fact she was the one who told me about this site. She's now an ex-mormon and divorced the a-hole she married just because he had a pass to the Lard's clubhouse.

Who got married?

As you know, you didn't miss much.

http://puremormonism.blogspot.com/2011/02/go-ahead-and-skip-that-temple-wedding.html

To any young girl whose fantasies resemble even a portion of that description, forgive me while I disabuse you of your illusions.

If you thought your temple wedding was going to resemble in any way the wedding of your girlhood dreams, you are in for a sore awakening. The temple is not the place for your fantasy wedding. It has been more accurately as “a wedding factory.”

Some time after your arrival at the temple, you will discover that you are not going to be the special bride that day. You will be waiting in a room with about a dozen or more other girls who have also come to be married. If the line of bridal candidates gets backed up, you'll be lucky if they give you twenty minutes.

That beautiful wedding dress you spent so much time and money on will be covered by shapeless white robes and an incongruous dull green apron. The beautiful veil that matches your dress will be taken from you and swapped out for some ugly generic thing they keep in a bin with a hundred others just like it.

When your turn comes, you will be herded into a small room in which those few family members who were able to wrangle a temple recommend will already be waiting. Even if there are only a few guests present, they will be crowded in together, because man, that room is tiny. A temple worker will place you into position.

You will not be walking down any aisle. Your father, assuming he could get in, will not be giving you away. There will be no music, no flowers, no maid of honor, no attendants, and no exchange of rings. Some old man you likely don't even know will conduct the ceremony, asking you to kneel across the alter from your soon-to-be husband, holding his hand in that awkward grip you learned the day before. Some words will be spoken, you will give your assent, then you will be told you may kiss each other if you wish.

In an instant, it's over. Your loved ones will tiptoe over, milling around you quietly, extending their congratulations in muted whispers so low you would think there is a sleeping baby somewhere everyone is trying not to wake. They are happy for you, but they are extremely reserved. This is, after all, The House of the Lord, and no place to be expressing joy.

But that doesn't last long anyway because you will all be ushered out quickly so they can get going on the next lucky couple.

We had two nieces get married Saturday.

You are so right. The weddings are about as personal as the Moonies mass weddings.

I think they should allow regular weddings without a one year waiting period like TSCC allows in other countries. I know they allow it because the countries won't recognize the marriage performed in the temple, and it is the carrot to try and get as many temple weddings so ensnare as many as possible.

A top comment from people who find out I left is what about the marriage/temple covenants I made. It doesn't bother me as I know they were all bogus, but it does affect family and DW.

Temples do not conduct weddings/marriages. Not really!
I have maintained that the temple sealing is just a religious ordinance that is all imaginary silliness and only important to the believers who can't claim it's valid anyhow. Been there done that, it's more about making commitments to the church than to each other.

There is nothing individual or special about any of it. The bride and groom are usually part of a large assembly line group and have little to no time together.

The only thing that makes it valid is the paperwork and one sentence that actually marries the couple in the temple. The rest is some old dude rambling on and on and on, and in my experience, making totally inappropriate comments while the few people in the room stare at their feet!

I don't for a minute believe there is anything worth seeing. Miss it? You didn't miss much of anything of real importance.

It's traditional in the Mormon religious "tribe" to have a temple marriage, which they believe has sealing powers that do not exist.
Unfortunately, those that do not attend are seen as "unworthy" which is more nonsense.

Rubbing the back doing the Garment Feel-Up is disgusting and someone needs to have their hands slapped!!
Oh well, to each his own.

I once knew a Catholic priest...who told young couples..get married by a jp and come back in a year for your formal, religious marriage ceremony...

stormy