So there are a couple of posts here today that talk about people feeling like they have to do something but don't really want to. I have been thinking about this for a while and thought I would see what the board has to say about this.

One of the big principles of mormonism is that everyone in the church is subject to a higher up. Members to bishops to stake presidents, to area reps, to GA's, to the 12 to the first presidency to the "profit". All thinking is done for everyone at every level except the "big dog" which is one of the main things that makes this a cult. When one of the higher ups speaks, that is the law, unless he is trumped by someone higher than him. Everyone in the church is expected to simply follow blindly whatever they are told to do without questioning. Blind faith is the expected norm. If you question anything at all you are an apostate.

Logical thinking, reasoning, and decision making is discouraged by all levels. In fact, what I have discovered about myself is that when I left the morg I had to learn to do these things and it took some time. One poster today said that his DW demands that he go to church to help with the kids but he doesn't want to. You see, under normal circumstances for normal people all you would have to do is reason your way through a question like that and you would have an answer. For example, you would ask yourself. Why is she demanding that I go to church to help with the kids? What is her ultimate motive for this demand? Why is she demanding I do something I clearly don't want to do? What will it accomplish if I do as she is demanding? Who will it benefit? What are the pros and cons to both sides of this matter? In the end, as you reason your way through that issue you can come to some concise conclusions that will give you the answer as to what you will do.

For me in the above scenario I would simply tell DW that I do not like going to church, and in fact I dislike it so much that it makes me feel uncomfortable so if she wants help with the kiddies leave them home. If she chooses not to leave them home, well that is her choice and I would not allow her to bully me or make me feel guilty for her choice. It is simple reasoning really, and once you have reasoned it out and made your decision, as long as your decision is logical and fair, well then the ball is in her court. I suspect she is doing this to get him to go to church and leaving the kids home with him is not an option because her real motivation for doing it is to get him there.

Using guilt to coerce people to do what is wanted is one of the main tools used by the morg and most people are so accustomed to accepting that type of manipulation from the morg that when it is used on them by others they simply do not see it for what it really is.

So I guess what I am trying to say here is that when I was in the morg I was emasculated. I was deprived of my power to make decisions and think logically. Of course, I allowed myself to be emasculated, but I was stripped of my spirit, my individuality, and my logical thinking and decision making nonetheless. Just as a meek man is emasculated by a domineering wife, I was when I gave the church the power to take these rights away from me.

When I took this right back for myself I had to learn how to do it because I didn't have someone telling me how to think and what to do about every situation in my life. It has been so empowering to learn these new skills and implement them in my life. In so many ways since leaving the morg I feel like a new man, but this one area has really been wonderful for me.

If you really want to be emasculated, wait until the prophet sends you on a 3 year mission somewhere far away and then marries you wife while you are gone!!

Not that this would happen today, mind you. But, the same mentality exists.

Yes the church emasculates men, but what does it do to women? You can't cut the nuts off of a woman, so what's the right term?

Anyway, my point is that women don't even get the imagined power of the priesthood. They have to run to men for everything and as a result it seems like many of them become absolute masters of manipulation. Let's label my Mother-in-Law exhibit A.

So the wife is being sneaky and complaining about needing help with the children. Just like the husband is conditioned to be manipulated, the wife is also conditioned to do this kind of manipulation. It's just the way things are done in Mormonism.

A real happy ending in this situation is if both the husband and wife recognize the dysfunction and grow past it. I'm on that path with my wife now and our relationship is getting better all the time.

Oh, here's the promised naughty language:
Stupid fucking cult!

Stunted.

I would lose some respect for my husband if he was such a pushover.

Diamond, that is.

Utahnomo,

so glad you brought this up. I have been formulating a thread for a while. I haven't read Guns, Germs and Steel yet, but wifey was always wondering why zebras were never domesticated. Seems that if the natives could harness horsepower, they would be in much better shape.

According to Jared, zebras were never domesticated because there is no alpha. When critters live surrounded by predators and every one in your tribe will eventually die to the tooth and claw of great cats, there is no alpha to lead. Everyone is just on their own, and nasty. Oh, and zebras are nasty critters. You would be too.

According to Jared, to domesticate a species, you control the alphamale by controlling its access to procreation and the tribe will follow. LBJ had a similar quote about the Vietnamese but I digress. But all domesticated species come from a preexisting order that is controlled by an alphamale. Goats, cattle, sheep, et al.

But isn't that exactly how Unca Joe controlled people? By controlling and subjugating the alpha in the human unit? Once you control the access to sex of the alpha, then you control the alpha and the alpha's unit. Think FLDS.

Incredibly simple once you put it in terms of animal husbandry.

The church had both of my nuts, for over 50 years. I've worked hard and notice that I do have one recovered. I hope I live long enough to get the other one too. They kicked me so long and hard there's not much hope, I blame them for most of the stress of my heart condition. My grandfather lived into his mid nineties, my father is pushing 90 and so is my mother. The stress this call on me and my family is a direct result of trying to be perfect for over 55 years, never good enough, low self esteem, and more stress any healthy person with a healthy heart could survive. All of you lurkers, a fair truthful warning. If you have anything to do with the mormon chur ch, your mind in your body, will be Ruined for life.

This damned voice sensitive microphone has its own personality.
It just started the race see my post and I'm just too tired to fix it