Posted by:
ExMormonRon
(
)
Date: February 03, 2011 09:33AM
We have a really unique dynamic going in our home. Shila is ex-JW and I'm ex-Mo. We have some side-splitting conversations and we have some that make you just want to cry. For example:
We're discussing polygamy and I'm explaining how misleading it is that the Morg states it has nothing to do with polygamy. I show her how the Morg teaches that, after this life, men become gods and have a ton of goddesses with whom they can copulate and make spirit children. Without missing a beat, she says that wouldn't work for the JW because only 144,000 will go to the equivalent of the CK and, if you mix the doctrines, that means only one man from earth would go and he'd have 143,999 wives. I peed my pants.
She related how the governing Elders of the Watchtower Society tried to pinpoint the second coming and picked 1975. Shila's mother told her that education was, therefore, not important and that she needed to get married and start a family. Shila dropped out of school, got married, and had her first son at age 17. This made me cry.
I told her that there were 7' tall Quakers on the moon that need to be converted to mormonism. She quipped that she hoped the Mormons liked oatmeal. Bwahahahahaha!
We talked about the JW bible. I showed her where there were verses that were, well, missing. For example, say John 5:21 said something they didn't like. It would look like this in the JW bible (this is hypothetical. I can't remember which verses):
5:21 -
I asked why. She said, fuckifIknow. We both peed our pants.
I told her I was always fascinated with the JW magazines "Awake" and "The Watchtower". I thought it was cool because they had post-second-coming families sitting under a tree with casual clothes, having a picnic, one kid picking an apple from a tree and a lion with his arm around a lamb. She said "Ronnie? Where the hell do you come up with these things?". We both peed our pants.
On and on it goes. She's a peach among peaches. :)
http://www.pbase.com/roninhouston/image/98485756.jpgJust sayin'...
Ron