I first posted back in October I believe and I just wanted to let everyone know how things ended up working out for me! Here's the original post, by the way:

"I'm an 18 year old who attends BYU now. My dad was my bishop back home for around 3 years, and has been in the bishopbric since I can remember. My family is one of the well known mormon families in the church and I received my mission call about a month ago.

When I was about 16, I had a non member girlfriend that my parents highly disapproved of. After about 6 months, we started having sex, which most of you know is a huge sin in the church..we continued to have sex until I broke up with her after a year and a half of dating (she just ended up being psycho). Then I've had a few girlfriends since that I've fooled around with and none of this I have really "repented" of. I lied in interviews to receive my mission call and enter the temple. After going to the temple and seeing what all goes on there, that's when my questioning first started. I know that when I tell my bishop I've had sex and fooled around just last weekend, I won't be going on my mission and such.

That being said, I feel like everyone's going to be so disappointed in me and whatnot for not being "worthy", but it's going to be much worse when I tell them I'm highly considering not being a member anymore. There are parts of the church I agree with, like the word of wisdom, just because of personal belief, but a lot of it seems straight up crazy. After reading about the Freemasonry and the different versions of the first vision, it's really starting to ease the decision. I'm just incredibly scared knowing that my whole life is going to change when I tell them I don't want to be apart of it, knowing that there are 100+ family members that will potentially try to suade me otherwise (My mom is one of twelve, my dad one of 6).

Any suggestions on how to tell them and how to deal with potentially being cut off financially being a college student and emotionally?"



It's been a long 4 months, let me tell you that...As of now, I haven't been to church since November, I've withdrawn from BYU, officially canceled my mission, everyone at home/school/relatives know, and things are completely out in the open. No need to worry, though! I couldn't be happier with the way things have worked out for me.

I currently go to Texas A&M, live in a house with 5 other guys that are fantastic, and my parents have somewhat come around, you could say. Since my "coming out" you could say, there have been countless attempts to send me links to my TBM mission blogs to read their letters, stories about how happy people are in the church, etc, but I just usually ignore them and go on with my day. They are paying for some of my schooling (about how much they were paying at BYU, which is next to nothing) so I have to come up with the differences on my own. I'm not surprised things worked out, because I knew that in the end, I'd have to find what would make ME happy and not what everyone else wanted for me. I'm happy with what I'm doing now and it was worth every single bit of it. For any one questioning whether or not you want to be in the church, whether you choose to or not, just do what YOU believe is right for YOU and do what YOU believe will make YOU happy.

Don't sacrifice your time or your life for something you don't believe in. If you believe in TSCC, then go on ahead and do it. But if not, you'll regret every second you continue to waste, I promise. It's worth taking action now. Just some advice :)

Thanks for all your support here! You guys are awesome and really helped me see things in a different perspective. I appreciate everything.

Keep up the schooling, even though it is hard and expensive. It'll pay off one day.

I'm glad that things are working out for you. It sounds like you're having a blast at school. Isn't freedom sweet?

I remember reading your post and I was concerned that the stress you might have been feeling was going to be insurmountable.
Your fortitude or inner strength is inspiring.

I'm thrilled for you!!

This is wonderful. I am really happy you let your heart guide you and not TBM's. You have done well for yourself. And yes, having to pay a lot for school is tough but it will be well worth the struggle. You have become your own man. You did not want to waste two yrs. of your life living a lie.

Family who really care about you will show it and those that don't care don't deserve you. If their organization is worth more than you let them swim in that sea of rules, Temple attendance, forced tithing, etc. while you go out and live a much happier fulfilled life.

I am sure you have made many friends recently. And just think, those people at A&M would never have been in your life but for you making it happen. Enjoy college. It is the best time.My daughter went to school in Texas also and loved it.

Word of advice:

Don't ever feel guilty for being "normal". And be safe (protect yourself and others). You don't want any unexpected babies or diseases.

Go for the schooling...whatever it costs.

Well done.

K

I also remember your post and feeling for you. Congrats on gaining your freedom, don't ever let it go.

great news about the rents not disowning you. That shows even they are looser from the bonds of servitude than you imagined.

the better news is that you are now an example to younger sibs and cousins that you can shed the familial shackles and lead your own life.

You don't realize it yet, but you have many younger relatives preparing to follow your gameplan.

Congrats. Hook 'em horns!

It's so nice to hear that young people are seeing the light and disengaging from the craziness!

Every precious minute! Thanks for the update.

Thanks for the update! It sounds like you already have figured out that the only power your family has over you is what you give them. Some people don't figure that out their whole lives!

Congratulations. It's nice to hear a somewhat happy-ending story. I guess the best way to help your family to adjust is to continue to follow your dreams and lead a happy life.

I just want to add to anybody else lurking here that NO ONE has any obligation to tell a bishop or anybody else about what you do sexually. That is just the biggest intrusion, next to actual sexual abuse, that I can think of .

There are so many reasons to leave the mormon churchified corporation that something so private as one's sexual behaviors do not have to be any part of it.