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Posted by: cpalmer312 ( )
Date: August 20, 2011 10:37PM

Mine are way too numerous to name. I loved trying anything I could. Smoking cigars and drinking. I had 3 girls in the mission field that thought I was coming back to them.

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Posted by: Brother Of Jerry ( )
Date: August 20, 2011 10:49PM

Taking a "vacation" in Florida while serving in Recife, Brazil has a pretty high missionary chutzpah factor!

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Posted by: cpalmer312 ( )
Date: August 20, 2011 10:52PM

DUDE, That's awesome. BTW I Served in Paraguay



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/20/2011 10:52PM by cpalmer312.

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Posted by: Anon regular lurker ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 03:39AM

I went to the Caribbean, so the opportunities abounded for many things.....

1. Had sex on my mission, and kissed other girls.

2. Flew on a plane to an island in the Grenadines with David Bowie on the flight. Hung out at Basils bar in Mustique. Saw Mick Jagger and Raquel Welch there.

3. Went swimming, snorkling, etc.

4. Went Parasailing.

5. almost got thrown out of a country, or arrested when my companion got us caught after he stole fish out of a fish trap in Anguilla. We barely made it off the island, only after bullshitting the local guy who owned the trap that it was a dude who sold us the fish.

6. Saw many movies.

7. Sunbathed on Orient beach in St. Maarten. (For those who don't know, it's a famous nude beach on the french side. Saw lots of boobies and hung Rasta men)

8. Charged personal goods from the local stationary store while I was in the office staff. MIssion president was oblivious. Plus, was able to erase my personal supply tab, that was near $100. And, while there I robbed many unsuspecting greenie missionaries to exchange local currency for US money which was more valuable. I saved enough to buy a really expensive camera outfit and gucci watches before I came home.

The list goes on, and includes other lesser charges, but as you can see, I wasn't the greatest at following rules. On islands where no-one gave a crap about the church and islands that had been tracted out multiple times what else were we gonna do. IT was warm, and the women wore little clothing........

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Posted by: anagrammy ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 03:50AM


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Posted by: jjnewbs ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 01:17PM

Yeah I remember those good times in that mission. Beaches daily in barbados and trinindad, carnival in port of spain now that was a blast, girls every where. Heading down to a resort in the middile of no where in Central Guyana. It was a pretty fun 2 year vacation in the carribean

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Posted by: Levi ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 04:04AM

And I will be honest.....I'm super proud of that fact.

Skipped church meetings when we could
Never really fasted
Would go MONTHS without knocking on a door
Went out on the town a number of times
Watched movies starting the second week I was there 'till I went home. LOTS and LOTS of movies. Way too many to count, but we tried once and it was about 80 and I still had 12 months left!!!!
Had sex with a companion
Didn't eat mugi
**I ate just about everything else**
Never read the entire BoM in order as was mandated. I lied and said I had.
Wish I had been able to leave the country once, but we did leave the mission once.

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Posted by: newcomer ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 01:11PM

what's mugi?

Levi Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> And I will be honest.....I'm super proud of that
> fact.
>
> Skipped church meetings when we could
> Never really fasted
> Would go MONTHS without knocking on a door
> Went out on the town a number of times
> Watched movies starting the second week I was
> there 'till I went home. LOTS and LOTS of movies.
> Way too many to count, but we tried once and it
> was about 80 and I still had 12 months left!!!!
> Had sex with a companion
> Didn't eat mugi
> **I ate just about everything else**
> Never read the entire BoM in order as was
> mandated. I lied and said I had.
> Wish I had been able to leave the country once,
> but we did leave the mission once.

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Posted by: amos2 ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 07:02AM

I was a rule buff.
I felt guilty my entire 18 years of activity for a few minor infractions...like letting my brother visit me in the mission field and letting him ride in a mission car, once (that's against the rules). Then, I took a spin on his motorcycle! (about a 2 mile trip)

I masturbated once, and told my MP. I was very brave to tell him because I thought I'd get sent home. He just put me on a monthly reporting plan, and made me a zone leader.

I was an asshole.

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Posted by: cpalmer312 ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 09:55AM

I had my appendix removed and one of the local girls came to comfort me by giving me a wonderful blowjob. I loved those Paraguayan women.

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Posted by: Stray Mutt ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 12:16PM

I spent most of my mission in remote areas with no one checking up on us. We could have done anything as long as we sent in the weekly reports. But I had that fear of an all-seeing God and the MP's power of discernment. What a sucker I was.

My worst infraction was shooting a gun. We were working on an Indian reservation, a member's husband was at work, and she was freaked out about a vicious-looking stray dog hanging around the edges of the woods. She wanted us to shoot it. I took a few shots, didn't hit it (and I don't think I really wanted to) but scared it away.

And there were the times we helped people paint their house or dig potatoes when it wasn't P Day. Shame on us for doing charitable manual labor instead of harassing people about religion.

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Posted by: Darksparks ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 01:30PM

We lived in a place that had no connection to public water. All of our water came from tanks that filled up during tropical rainfall.

The main tank had no cover on it. During mid day, the sun would shine right on the water...which means that it eventually started growing Algae.

After a few weeks of this, our shower water would turn green. So we would have to get on top of the house and clean it. Of course, while cleaning out the algae, we had to immerse ourselves in the water and swim around inside the tank a bit.

One time after doing this, the zone leaders showed up and asked us why we all had sunburn. We didn't get in trouble because the constantly sweating ZL's were jealous.

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Posted by: Xanax ( )
Date: August 21, 2011 05:27PM

I don't think I will go on a mission. If so, I'll see. But I don't know how a mission is.

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