So, back in May I moved out of my parents house. A lot of shit went down, as they did a lot of stupid things trying to get me back under their control. One of the things they did, that I cannot understand, is to steal my money.

The first thing I did once I had left their house for good, was to transfer the money I had saved while working at a grocery store. Everything was fine and good, until my bank account was shut down. So, I walked into one of their branches and sat down with a personal banker. Turns out my parents had accused me of using a fake I.D to set up the bank account. Why the bank would consider shutting down my account at the request of my parents is a mystery to me, but it happened. I think it may have something to do with the help they received from the cop in their ward, but that's another story.

Anyways, the banker sets me up with a new account and the first thing I do is to withdraw all of my money. I sure as hell wasn't about to let that disappear, my very survival depended on that money. A week later, my account is closed again, this time because of massive overdraft fees. Turns out, my parents withdrew the money from the bank account I had initially transfered the money from, resulting in a bounced check. When I found this out, I thought, "Ok, I can understand them trying to find me, but to completely fuck me financially?"

Not only did they do that, but today, after a long game of telephone tag, I find out that they cashed a refunded check from the University I had hoped to attend. The money was mine, the check was in my name...and they cashed it.

What the fuck? How could they justify doing this? I expected a lot of things to happen, and they did. But this? I didn't expect my parents to fucking rob me of everything I had saved up just because I said no to their fucking stupid religious beliefs.

They'll be receiving a letter from my attorney soon. Turns out there's an exmo lawyer who's willing to help, pro-bono.

I expected a lot of things to happen, but this just dumbfounded me. I expected rejection, which happened. I expected testifying, which happened. I expected my reputation to be destroyed, which happened. I did not expect to be robbed. I love how they claim to be a religion of family values, but whenever you leave the family they fuck you over and over and over again.

It seems like some of the most insistent, controlling TBMS don't even practice the values that they preach.

I think the one overriding value for them is conformity and control. If you don't conform, they feel entitled to do anything.

I hope you can put a lot of distance between yourself and your family so you can heal. I think you should switch banks, maybe even bank in another town or on the internet and don't tell them where.

And press charges if you have enough evidence to convict.

Get the bank involved. They may greater legal resources to go after your parents.

Contact the police. If they forged your signature to cash your refund, and the bank has record of them withdrawing from your account (I'm assuming you didn't set them up as able to legally draw money from the account) this is criminal activity. Prosecute them, they are thieves.

Seems to me your parents committed some serious crimes.

It's also awesome that you are following through legally. Excellent move on your part.

Sorry your parents are such douches.

This is about identity theft and people who are not on you account accessing your funds and cashing your checks.

You must take legal action, to let the banks know that you are not giving your parents the right to dip into you accounts and to let your parents know that you are willing to do whatever it takes to have them respect you and your rights.

Seems to me the only boundary they are going to understand is legal prosecution and a judge telling them they have no right to steal from their adult child, no matter how justified they feel in doing so.

Do not feel sorry for them when they get in trouble over this and don't let them out of it by not pressing charges.

By doing what they did they accept the consequences of what's going to happen to them.

It's mind boggling that the people I thought I knew could do such things.

when they are stealing your funds and making "consequences" for you for leaving "The Church".

It was discussed on this site before how Mormons manufacture consequences for leaving the Church because in real life nothing bad happens to us when we quit, God doesn’t drop a wad misfortune on us when we discover the Church is a fraud and leave, so this is how Mormons teach their children about how bad things happen if you leave, YEA, they create trouble for their children, then want to say, see, we told you this would happen.

Manufactured consequences.

Bring all of the paperwork - evidence of what they have been doing. Get a copy through your bank of the check they forged and all other items: evidence they signed checks on your account, or used withdrawal slips at the bank.

Contact the bank fraud dept and give them all the info also.

Contact the University about the check fraud and get another check sent to you at your PO box.

Then don't open any more checking accounts for the time being.

Do not contact your parents who perpetrated the check fraud.

I'm just guessing but I doubt this is the first time these people have engaged in bank fraud.

This is check fraud and identity theft -- I've had something similar happen to me (not a relative). It took some time to get it straightened out, but I got all of my money back.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/28/2011 12:47PM by SusieQ#1.

I've realized there's a lot I don't know about them. I haven't written them anything about this issue, as far as they're concerned, I'm not doing anything about it. They'll know whenever they get a legal letter.

Thanks for the advice, Susie. I've got a bad taste with banks as it is, so I'm going to be very cautious in the future.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/28/2011 12:51PM by Strykary.

Strykary Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I've realized there's a lot I don't know about
> them. I haven't written them anything about this
> issue, as far as they're concerned, I'm not doing
> anything about it. They'll know whenever they get
> a legal letter.
>
> Thanks for the advice, Susie. I've got a bad taste
> with banks as it is, so I'm going to be very
> cautious in the future.


I worked in banking for many years. You need to get acquainted with someone in the fraud dept that will watch out for your account and keep in touch with them. Also, the best bank may be a small local bank (maybe in another city close by) where you can get to know the manager who can keep an eye on your accounts also.

A police officer will be assigned to your case also.They will decide if there is enough evidence to file charges.

Right now, you'll have to work with the banks that your parents defrauded. Try to develop a rapport with someone in a local branch if it's a large bank- particularly the one your parents used to defraud you. Take photo's of your parents into the bank to let them know what they look like. Make copies for the police also.

If this was done on line, you'll need to change your password and have the fraud dept flag your account so nobody else can use it.

They have good policies in place to help you.
This is going to be quite a process for you!
So sorry it's your parents that have defrauded you. Unfortunately, it is usually a relative that does these kinds of things.

I got caught in a really good Ring! I don't know if they ever caught them. But I got my money back.:-)

One more tip that helps that we use: only put an initial and your last name on your checks when you open an account. No more info is needed.

We use very few checks now. Most of our banking is done by automatic debit, automatic credit and on line transfers, etc.

Best wishes to you!

The Mormon god is on their side, so they can do almost anything to an apostate because they are good and you are bad. It's so very demented. Won't they be surprised to find themselves in trouble with the law... best of luck to you. Please keep us posted on how it's going.

I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this. It is the kind of thing my parents have done in the past. It was quite an eye opener to find out who they really are, and how cruel they are. Like you, I learned that about them while I was young. It probably saved me a lot of grief though. I didn't have much to do with them in my adult years. My children were spared having to be around them. I never gave them a chance to steal from me again.

They are trying to save you, so doing this will get your attention and possibly return you to reliance upon them. I know many mormons who see nothing wrong with this kind of behavior "for your own good."

You mention you are leaving home. I don't know how old you are, but if this account was set up before you were 18 one of them would have had to be on the account with you. Is it possible they still are? I know I am on my 19 year old child's account. I tried to get my name taken off after he was 18, but they would not just remove me unless we both were present and signed something. If this is the case they would still have legal access to the account. If this is not the case then by all means you should press charges against them.

I wonder if they tithed on the money they took from you.

They had their name on the account I transfered the money from, that's how they made the check bounce. I was the sole owner of the second account that was shutdown. All of this took place before I turned 18, (graduated high school in May, so was legally able to move out when I did) so my attorney tells me that my parents are responsible for the overdraft fees on the second account. The cashed check just digs them deeper into the hole they're already in.

About the last bit, tithing. After this happened, the emails I started receiving from my Father said "Sent from Android." He didn't have a smartphone before, and was staunchly against getting one because they couldn't afford the data plans...but then they suddenly have $1,400...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/28/2011 01:28PM by Strykary.

I'm sorry to hear this, I remember when you first posted about leaving and the way your parents were trying to control you using your own money from that bank.

Glad to see you got an exmo lawyer and I hope he can help set your parents straight and hopefully get your money back, refund check, bank fees et al. Definitely talk to the people at the bank. If you had closed that original account how were they able to overdraft it?

I wish I could help you somehow, but it seems you're on the other side of the pond.

Good luck,
D

Notify police and press charges.
They are stealing from you, it's FRAUD and THEFT.
Depending on how much money they stole, it could be a FELONY.

think about putting it in a credit union as opposed to a bank.

wine country girl Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> think about putting it in a credit union as
> opposed to a bank.

That works also. Credit Unions operate like banks but are not part of the American Banking Assoc.

There's much better reasons these days...

I've only heard bits and pieces about Credit Unions. What are the benefits?

Generally... Fewer fees, like what some big banks are rolling out right now.
And usually better interest rates.
It's a small difference, but can make a big difference when you are just setting out in life.

I wouldn't recommend a mortgage through a CU though, but that's only based on my husband's work rate shopping. He says they beat big banks on checking/saving accounts and some CDs, but not necessarily on mtgs.

I use "generally" and "usually" because it is up to you to do your homework, it's a big world with shysters on every corner.

Your savings is called "shares". You are not just a customer but an owner and member. You get to vote on officers, etc. Generally CU's are much more helpful than banks when it comes to loaning you money or providing good service!
I haven't used a bank (other than for my mortgage) for over 30 years, but I belong to 2 credit unions.

Also, as a member of a CU you are an shareholder and not an account holder. In otherwords a CU is owned by it's members unlike a bank. CUs are more accountable to thier members and tend to keep them involved in major decisions.

I would totally help you out researching a good financial institution, I don't know how comfortable you would feel sharing info though... 4presto@gmail if you like.

I was denied help from my parents when I left at 18, although my sister got all the help she needed. They didn't go as far as TAKING money from me, but wanted desperately for me to fall on my face in the evil outside world. The difference in our church loyalty was surely obvious by then.
That is why I would help you with information if I could.


And count me in, waiting to hear how your parents get their due spanking!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/28/2011 01:52PM by WinksWinks.

Once I get this business sorted out I may pick your brain. I'll be sure to keep everyone updated when the wheels pick up speed, right now they're already moving but at a slow pace. In a way I'm glad it turned out this way, because the bank did honor my check (that's where the overdraft comes from) and without them having done that I wouldn't be in school right now. So the only loose end to tie up is the overdraft fees.

I don't need any financial assistance from my parents, which is good. I found some good people who were willing to help me out, what a little networking and good luck can do. My parents sent me an email to the tune of "we'll be here when you fail."



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 11/28/2011 02:00PM by Strykary.

"There will be a blizzard in hell before I ever trust you two again."

:)

What thry did was against the law and it will be very interesting to see how it all pans out, and there will be repercussions against the bank for allowing them to mess with an account they don't have their name on. That would be the same as my parents shutting down my accounts and the banks letting them do it. And I'm 39.

They were on your account, possibly as a UGMA/UTMA or just a joint designation. If the check was deposited into that account and then withdrawn they have broken no law. If it was a UGMA/UTMA and they did not use the funds for you, than a civil court could require them to reimburse you.

Their behavior is aggressive and damaging but most likely not illegal. Banks have very strict guidelines for this kind of action, most of the guidelines are to protect them from any kind of liability.

They are surely waiting for you to fail in your new life outside of the fold. I hope you are extremely successful in whatever you do from now on, because that would truly be the most delicious revenge. We're all cheering you on.

In most states, parents have the right to every cent you earn until you're 18. Very few actually know of or exercise that right.

They are likely required signatories to the establishing of the account you had if you were under 18, thereby giving them legal access to that money.

With the college check, if they received and cashed that before you were 18, I suspect they'll be in the clear on that one too.

Ethically, they're filth. Legally, they might get off free except for the bounced charges.

E-mail me? My wife works for a bank doing fraud investigations - this is RIGHT up her alley.

email addy is the same as my login here - but at Yahoo or BigFoot.com

You might need to sic the cop's superiors on him, too.

So sorry you are having to deal with this.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/28/2011 05:27PM by matt.

You know the weird thing is that I'm pretty sure that I had my own checking account in high school, long before I turned eighteen. Maybe it was something peculiar to the state I was living in. Or maybe people didn't question things quite as closely in those days. I did have a separate custodial account at another bank as a child.

Good luck to you, Strykary. At least now you know not to trust your parents in any financial matters. I refer to such instances as, "tuition in the school of life." I hope things work out in your favor.