Some of you are familiar with the sad tale of my RM son and his health problems resulting from his mission service.

Because of these health issues he has had to re-train as he was unable to continue with the career he was qualified in before he left on his mission. This has put a very tight squeeze on his finances, with he and his wife really struggling to make ends meet. We have already helped them out a lot, but we are also financially helping another child who is dealing with the negative consequences of LDS interference in her life. (A whole 'nother thread, if I ever have the strength for it).

Anyhow, my son hasn't attended church for months, and has no intention of ever doing so again.His wife is TBM and last night she invited the bishop over to see if they could get some financial help.

After a long trawl through their finances and lots of probing questions about why they spent how much on what, the bishop decided TSCC could indeed help them. In return he expects them to clean the chapel Saturday.

Fair enough,you might say. But my son is still unwell and has more serious surgery in three weeks. He is using every ounce of will-power to continue with his training, while needing heavy duty pain-killers. He is often exhausted and almost at the end of his endurance. But he carries on, getting assignments done, doing work placements and so on. I really admire him for it.

What is it with this Multi-million dollar business masquerading as a church? All their money, but they squeeze until the pips squeak.

Yea we'll nose through your finances, make you feel inadequate about your money management and then you can drag yourself into the chapel Saturday and clean it. Because we sacked all the janitors so we could save yet more money.

I don't know how this will go. My son texted us last night saying 'call me'. This was a ploy to get out of the room, and that's when he told us about it all. I wish he would tell the bishop to stick his money where the sun don't shine, but there is the wife to consider.....

Not what you'd call 'charity' is it?

Or does she need a few more $%@# punts before she wakes up?

I think she is coming around somewhat. After my son had his big showdown with the previous bishop, when he was called various names and other Christ-like behaviour was displayed by the bishop, his wife was called to a 'prestigious' leadership position.

Last month she asked to be released, largely because of my son's ill-health.So she did recognise that the 'calling' was a burden, but I think she requested release, rather than resigned.

Still, it's progress.

Serious surgery means that there are still things that they are trying to do for him.

Are any of them working?

He had surgery last August, which helped for a while, but not permanently. So he is having a more complicated surgery done February. Unfortunately he will almost definitely get pancreatitis again, as this surgery involves his pancreas. He had four bouts of pancreatitis last year, one so severe his life was endangered.

His surgeon is at the top of his profession,so we are very lucky there.

Hi European View,

I wish your son the very best. Your post was chilling. I had idiopathic pancreatitis when I was 22. No one can imagine how scary, painful, and life-threatening it is without going through it.

I'm really sorry to hear how much your family has suffered. I sincerely hope that there will be a complete turnaround, and that your son will be fine.

Steve

I watched my ex suffer through several bouts of pancreatits. Make food poisining lool like morning sickness.

Just curious if it's not to personal how his mission could cause him to suffer like this. Not doubting just truly curious as t
what I witnesed was all due to alcohol.

He is lucky to have you for parents.

That is so sad. I can't think of another church that requires service in exchange for charity. The catholic church will give food to anyone in need, no questions asked.

Exactly, emma. There are lots of churches and organisations that just help those in need.

My OH told son to take what he can get from TSCC and just consider it a repayment of our many years of tithing.No guilt.

I agree on this point. I advise anyone who can get money from them with no risk of going back to take what they will give you.

That sounds like a business deal more than an act of charity. Some church.
Didn't Christ say something about helping the sick and the needy?

I think I recall that he did, misfit, but since when did TSCC take any notice of what he had to say?

Can you find some other charitable organization (either a church or other) that might be able to help?

I know that when I was down and out I went to the church and they refused to help. I didn't look for help in other places because it felt like I had nowhere else to turn - this came from the weird mindset I still had then that somehow other organizations wouldn't be understanding.

Later on I realized I could have went to the Salvation Army, other churches in the area etc. to see if I could have received at least some assistance.

I know you are not in the US but I wonder if you've explored other options. I think the mormon mindset creates a huge blind spot where you think that if they don't help there's nowhere else to go.

That's a good thought, polymath. I'll look into what resources there are in his area. Thanks.

I would encourage my son to tell his wife he will support her in what she chooses to do (emotionally, he obviously can't physically) but that he is not up for cleaning the building, period. And maybe have him discuss with her these other assistance options so that she is aware that he isn't throwing them under a bus. Plus, her seeing how a REAL charity operates will throw yet more oil on the fire of the Mormon Church's funeral pyre.

Personally, I think this just shows how hard up for building cleaners they are. :)

European View: You wrote>
He had surgery last August, which helped for a while, but not permanently. So he is having a more complicated surgery done February. Unfortunately he will almost definitely get pancreatitis again, as this surgery involves his pancreas. He had four bouts of pancreatitis last year, one so severe his life was endangered.

His surgeon is at the top of his profession,so we are very lucky there<

I work with a man whose wife has had 4-5 surgeries since Thanksgiving. Her pancreatitis was started by a gall stone. I live in a small town in Northeast Mississippi and was surprised to learn that there have been 6 or more cases in that time. Most have to be sent to Birmingham (Alabama) to the large medical center there. All this background to get to this question...Pancreatitis, does it seem to be on the increase?

Unless, of course, he turns up and does exactly what can feels physically capable of doing? I.E., nothing?