Posted by:
icanseethelight
(
)
Date: February 22, 2012 06:13PM
I was having a conversation with my sister who is also leaving the church the other day and we were talking about faithfulness and how I was a lot more likely to cheat when I was a TBM then I am now.
She agreed rather enthusiastically and we talked about why we feel that way.
As a TBM, I married, had kids, was faithful, etc. because that was the life plan, it is what I was supposed to do, and doing anything else made me no better than all the other wastrel men in the world who were evil bastards.
Losing my religion(anchor) and reassessing my whole life view has made me realize that while I may not have originally gotten married for love (I didn't) and I originally had kids only because I wanted to make my wife happy, that I really like having both my wife and kids around, and I love them, and do not want to hurt them. They are not just a part of "the plan" that I have to follow.
I no longer am with my wife because I am supposed to be, and I am not faithful out of fear or guilt, but because she fills the empty spaces that I have and I love and respect her and would never want to hurt her. And I do not interact with my kids out of a necessity to raise them but because they are interesting and special and I want them to be a part of my life for as long as I am around.
How have your relationships changed once you were living your life according to your own set of values rather than the artificial set you are given as a mormon?
Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 02/22/2012 06:56PM by icanseethelight.