Mid to late 40ish wife of creepy suspenders and bow tie wearing man who usually has a frightfully delighted smile on his face (with my wife I refer to him as the "pedophile" or "perv-creep" so she knows who I'm talking about, lol). In the last testimony meeting she stands up and in semi-weeping form delivers this gem:

"I just wanted to stand and let you know -- especially those who gave me my last priesthood blessing a few months ago, that even though I still suffer from back pain, in spite of being promised in the blessing that my pain would be taken from me, that my faith is still strong, I still know the church is true," yadda-yadda etc.

Poor lady probably doesn't even know that not only will her faith be unable to cure her back pain, it is also quite possibly the source of it, as religious addiction can produce psychosomatic symptoms like back pain.

I heard another classic last year -- a single gal in her 30s giving a talk on tithing. She was doing her best, but it seemed kind of half-hearted, leading me to remark to my wife that "this is the worst talk on tithing I think I've ever heard." Well, at the end of the talk she bears her testimony about tithing, etc. and then shares how she's been unemployed for months and has also been without health insurance as a result. Not exactly a poster-child for the blessings of paying your tithing, lol.

Yeah, I'm kind of in a pissy mood this morning, lol.

Got any similar gems?

That's interesting what you said about the ties between religious psychosis and back pain. It sounds far fetched, but I know a lot of Mormons with back issues. Do you know of a study on the subject?

Hey, if you know more about the back pain thing, please let me know!!! I'm not "out" about my disbelief to many, and I'm under incredible stress- and my neck and back have been killing me for years. I tried physical therapy. It didn't work, and doctors say they can't see anything wrong, and it's probably stress related.

http://www.lexpages.com/SGN/paschal/religious_addiction.html

Like it says on the bottom, taken from Leo Booth's "When God Becomes a Drug."

But I have firsthand experience with very high levels of stress being the trigger for a bout of shingles...

Leaving the church, a divorce, death of both parents, and being the executor of their estate - all within a couple of months. In fact, my mother passed away the day after I moved out of my home.

I am a firm believer in cutting out stress from my life. In fact, I analyze anything new coming into my life in terms of its potential stress level. I look for things that bring fun and joy and smiles, and life is so much better. I don't discount the fact that stress can also trigger other physical ailments, but have no facts to support that.