Submitted my letter about 2 weeks ago, got the confirmation letter back saying that it would be refered to the SP.

I am the process of getting a divorce, tired of the wife being more devoted to the church than to me - and that isn't saying much.

My story goes; growing up in SLC, 3 of us best friends from Elem school to HS. By High School it was obvious that "Bob" was not like the other 2 of us. The 2 "good boys" went on to serve missions. After my mission and appropriate "temple marriage" in the 80's, Bob called and asked if we could talk. I went to his work at the gas station and sat inside while we talked about old times, going to the movies at mid-night, and so on. He asked how being married was, and I told him it was "fine". He then went on to tell that he was gay, and I replied that I had figured that out my then. He also told me he had AIDS...something that had not ever crossed my mind. Bob died a few years later, but I could not bring myself to go to his funeral...not sure why exactly, and wish I could have been there now.

When wife asked why I resigned, I told her about a few years ago when Prop 8 was up for vote in Cali. I was recently replaced as HPGL, when the "new guy" calls and asks if I can meet him at church to make phone calls to Cali residents and ask them to go out and vote against prop 8. I was stunned. I declined, giving some excuse I don't remember. But that began the "soul searching"...the questioning why a church that considers itself "Christian" would waste the time of members and resources of the church to restrict the freedom of other people. Especially when those resources could have been put to use to help instead of persecute. How does the LDS church expect gay people to "obstain" from being who they are...and live a lie....when "god" made everyone in his own image? And then I told her that I know she cannot be happy with someone who is not a member of the church, and that is a big reason for the divorce.

I had heard all the Anti-LDS propaganda before in my life, I served an "honorable" mission in Alabama. But all of that has changed. I am making my own decisions, based on what is right and fair.

I am not gay, but I am finally free, and I now allow others to believe and worship how, when, or what they may.

Good for you, and welcome to the dark side!

Prop h8 really rubbed me the wrong way. I shoulda said something back then instead of waiting until recently.

I had a friend named Bob who contacted AIDS in the 80's and passed away not long after. We went to HS together on the west side of the SL valley. Most of us knew he was gay in high school but never talked about it.

My Bob was one of the reasons I learned to have compassion and not judge. He was a great friend and I was sad to learn of his passing.

Thanks.

utahstate; I more look at it as if I am finally seeing the light, just regret it took so long...

rachel1; you most likely know my name without my having to tell you then...

Magnite, I graduated from KHS in 1980. If that sounds familiar to you, I'd certainly love to hear from you. I moved away after high school and heard about Bob years later through Facebook. I'd always wondered what happened to him.

Welcome! I had a similar experience with Prop 8. While it wasn't the reason I left TSCC, it was the thing that made me take a hard look at all the other things I had put on "the shelf". I also had a very close friend who came at during college, and when the whole Prop 8 mess began I could not imagine worshiping a god who would tell his children to deny this friend the same rights as anyone else. I left the church within a few months of that.

I'm sorry to hear you lost your friend, and also sorry for your divorce. But this board is great when you need to vent! Enjoy the freedom, and the adventure that comes with it!

good for you. Back in the 80's when ppl were being crazy about aids my mom told me "You just have to be a good girl and you will never get that disease." Mormons and many other religious groups just never "got" it. Even today, who talks about aids? Not very many people. It hasn't gone away.

During the height of the Prop 8 campaign a sister from my local ward called me up ( I had not attended church for several years and had only a vauge idea who she was.) She asked me to support prop 8 and to give money to the campaign. I asked her why the church was doing such a hateful thing, when gay people only want to lead normal lives, they did not ask to be gay, and gay church members certainly would not be gay if they could help it. She broke down crying and said she hated what she was doing but was being forced by the ward leadership. I actually felt pretty badly at that point, she hung up sobbing.

Good for you. I am currently living in Alabama.

I know that sick feeling of having said and done things that were hurtful to gays because I was a member and was "obedient."

Many years ago I worked against the ERA which I now view as against my own best interest.

Good luck with your divorce. Life moves on. Enjoy the freedom and the quest.

Congratulations on resigning, but sorry you need to divorce. That's a lot to deal with. Things will get better even if it seems like that is forever away.

Maybe because I was a convert I never felt hatred toward gays. Those I knew were very funny, interesting people, just overall good people. They enjoyed life and were comfortable in who they were. Was it a façade for some? Perhaps. It is hard to imagine what hell they were in or going through.

One time in high school I was riding to seminary with my best friend. She recently found out her cousin was gay. Her words were "I can never forgive him for that!" As if it was about her, her feelings. And the utter hatred she spewed with those words caught me off guard. I couldn't say anything, just wondered how she could feel that way.

It's one of those Mormon things I just never got. Same as Native Americans coming from the Middle East, having to bear a testimony, being told what movies were OK to watch, the list goes on. Would TBMs say that I was never fully converted? Oh, you betcha. I consider myself lucky to have escaped the church's clutches

Thanks for posting. I am always in awe of people like you who leave so much on the alter of truth and swim against a torrent of disdain and shunning. You are welcome here. I applaud your courage.