Most of my neighbors are active Mormons. One of my neighbors came over today to chat and filled me in on the ward splitting and all of the new callings. Most of the leadership lives on my street. Sometimes I think that for socializing and inclusion alone, I might go back. Then I remember the doctrine, the sense of obligation, that I don't support most of the LDS' moral beliefs (I'm pro gay-marriage, for example.) Right now I'm inactive, people are leaving me alone, my records are who-knows-where, and I don't know if I should rock the boat.

I don't think it can be done, in the long run, for social reasons alone.

I suspect a few Mormons I'm friendly with do. They just believe in the Mormon political party line. They know I'm a supporter of gay marriage, a non-believer and diametrically opposed to all their cherished opinions.

They are friendly to me - probably just because of my wife, but I like to think they like me.

I don't know how you could do it and not be a bigot and an ultra conservative. My brother is a registered Democrat with a gay son who is in a relationship my brother supports. I have no idea how my brother does it.

He did tell me that he has zero chance of higher callings.

sounds like a plan

Wards can be as different as night and day, even in the same town. So I can only speak for my experience in my ward but I could NEVER go back for the social life. In fact, it's the absolute last reason I'd go back. It would be easier for Mormons to convince me Joseph Smith really was a prophet of God or that Satan is making up ridiculous traps to keep people from believing in Mormonism. But even if you could convince me the church is true and of the greatest benefit to humanity, the LAST people I'd hang out with are the Mormons in my ward. Their behavior has been absolutely appalling by MORMON standards. If I really believed in the church, these people are the last ones I'd want as friends because they don't live the gospel principles at all - while patting themselves on the back about their superior lives. I don't want to - I WON'T - hang out with trash like that and I wouldn't allow my kids to be taught by people that morally bankrupt. I do have Mormons I respect and I have an even longer list of Mormons I'm willing to politely tolerate but wanting to be friends with that crowd - NEVER. I don't want to feel included by them. In fact, I would think it's insulting if they considered me "one of the crowd." And even my LDS friends who live out of town or out of state - they think my former ward is just appalling too. That's how bad it is. If I moved, I'd still be cautious about using Mormons to socialize with, having been fooled by them once. And yes, I realize I sound angry and bitter - the typical exmo, by their standards - but the truth is they behaved atrociously and I am under no obligation to associate with people of low morals and low standards. It's as simple as that..



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/25/2014 02:34PM by CA girl.

My neighbors are unlike any Mormons that I've known. They have either grew up in a state other than Utah, or have experiences outside of Utah. They haven't brought up church to me very much. The are down to earth and have been very welcoming. I know that I'm more liberal than they are (politically.) It's awkward over hearing them talk about politics. But that's pretty much everywhere here. If they seemed completely insufferable, I wouldn't consider going back either.

That's what I did during college and for a few months afterward. Also, during my earlier years, since we lived outside the MoZone and our ward covered two counties, church was the only time I got to see my non-gentile (and therefore approved by the parental units) friends. There was a time I was actually eager to go to early-morning seminary so I could be with the girl I had a bad crush on.

You've got to be pretty desperate for company to do that.

I agree, someone would have to be desperate for company to go to the Mormon church just to socialize. I have my own social circle among actual adults who accept me despite my imperfections as a human being. To me, Mormon adults are infantilized to the point where the ones I know are obsessed with anything Disney, while I grew out of the whole fairy tale thing when I became an adult.

I couldn't go back for the social life, because I'd have to
pretend to be one of THEM and not ME.

It would be a fake social life.

But then, again, most of Mormon "social life" is a fake social
life.

But, often I have driven by the ward house and lamented on what
I had, socially, as part of the group, on the social aspects of
Mormonism that I've lost.

Good points. That's the main reason I didn't marry a Mormon man, thus giving myself a life sentence of being one of them and not me. Although I'm still worried about that, I think it will be easier being me this time around because I'm not married in the temple and they know that. They know where I stand. Where as when I went as a teen, and in the YSA wards, there was the assumption that I wanted temple marriage, not knowing that I had different thoughts for my future.

There are quite a few out there who probably stopped believing in the church and probably still go just to talk their friends but once the friends realize that their now non believing friends no longer support the faith, they go all out to beg them to come back. its not good at all. The church has brainwashed these TBM's so much it's sickening.

Met some of my first drinkin' buddies there...and then introduced a few bishops and SP's sons to malt beverages. Never socialized with Mormon girls, though....none of 'em looked like the beer drinkin' partying type to me.

Ron Burr

Rather than being the lowest man on the totem pole, I prefer being the highest.