There are lots of reasons why people allow themselves to remain LDS.

Here are three big reasons that I came up with, in reverse order, on why people have difficulty facing the truth about Mormonism:

#3 -- Practical considerations

For many, leaving the Morg is not a viable option because the consequences of "coming out of the closet" are just too painful. Maybe their marriage would fall apart or suffer considerable harm if they were to suddenly cease being LDS. Or, their very own children or grandchildren might be insulted and shun them.

For others, they would become the "black sheep" of the family -- a pariah. In Utah, you might lose employment status, especially if you work for the Church in some capacity. Or, maybe you would be shunned by neighbors or your circle of friends. Additionally, you might have a church calling, e.g. bishop, where people are heavily counting on you. It is virtually impossible being totally honest in such a situation.

In short, there are an awful lot of church members that just don't have the luxury to be totally objective regarding the history and doctrine of TSCC.

#2 -- Emotional reasons

None of us likes to be wrong -- ever. Leaving TSCC means admitting that we were wrong -- on a huge scale. More often than not, it means admitting that those who we have loved and trusted, and who loved us --, e.g. our very own parents -- were wrong. Other extended family members were wrong, as well.

Leaving the church means that church leaders that we have respected and relied upon -- bishop, Primary teachers, SS teachers, youth teachers, Prophet and Apostles, were either wrong or intentionally deceiving us. For many, that conclusion can be painful and difficult to accept .

It requires true humility and a ton of courage to admit that you and loved ones were wrong -- a lot of people are seemingly incapable.

#1 -- Your sense of justice

This is a biggie.

If the LDS church isn't what it claims to be, that means that a lifetime of service, sacrifice, and self-denial has been in vain. Even worse, your peers who are living "the high life" are getting away with it. That can be tough to stomach!

So, while you were obeying the law of chastity and were denied a normal youth and young adulthood, for example, your "immoral" friends do not suffer any apparent consequences for enjoying pleasures of the flesh. Maybe your marriage is in tatters but they have a great marriage. That can be tough to reconcile.

Or, while you spend your Sundays in those mind-numbing and butt-numbing meetings, your friends are out enjoying the weekend. While you abstain from alcohol, pay tithing, attend the temple, wear secret underwear that is unattractive and uncomfortable, normal people who had "lower standards" seem to come out on top.

In other words, the "eat, drink, and be merry" crowd is rewarded while you are banging your head against a brick wall trying to do "God's will." How fair is that? And in the process, maybe you become more psychologically screwed up than your gentile friends. That can really conflict with your sense of justice.


So, understandably, it can be quite difficult for many members to put the above considerations aside and objectively examine the history and doctrines of TSCC.

What say you?

Simple. Brainwashed completely.

Yes, there is some definite brainwashing.

However, the poster has a good point. Leaving the cult is not as easy as un-brainwashing yourself. There can be other considerations and consequences, as well.

Very well said. It isn't just Mormons that have that problem. Entire societies are like that. The culture itself is the cult not just the dominant religion. The Deep South has a lot in common with Utah.

you may be right but our food makes up for any regional shortcomings

How about this:

http://p.twimg.com/Av--tHHCEAAo8n6.jpg:large

Excellent post. I'm copying it into my "cult information" file. Thank you, Count C.

#2 is huge for someone with the innate self delusion that is required to even consider the cult of LSD to be a religion.

You literally go from being a "GOD" of your own universe to becoming a gullible shmuck that not only financed a money laundering operation for the mob but you served up your own children on a silver platter and ridiculed them if they didn't conform like some "loyal plastic robot for a world that doesn't care."
Good people don't fund secretive criminal organizations and brainwash their children into being a bunch of sissified slaves for a sex cult so accepting your own culpability in all this wickedness can be a diffiCULT thing to accept.

Mormons are truly evil and their actions ruin peoples lives. Whether they can admit that or not is of no concern since they are severely compromised individuals who practice only to deceive.

There is nothing worse than lying to children the way they do.

That's why they have horns on their head, duh.

I think it works for some people. Especially those who have lived their entire lives, or at least their entire adult lives in Utah. I know many who literally would not be able to function outside of Utah, let alone without a ready-made group of "friends" (for lack of a better word) if they moved.

It's not that they stay in, even when they have to know lots of it is sheer baloney. It's the judgment of people who it does NOT work for that makes them the wretched people they are. I'm ok with the ones who stay in for social or family reasons but who don't judge the ones who feel like they have to move on to be true to themselves.

#1 Sense of justice

It's the desire to believe that you are superior. That you have earned a higher place.

It all boils down to emotional abuse that started in SunBeams. Our entire self worth and life boils down to a frickin' temple recommend. We've handed our lives over to an institution. Obedience is Freedom. Obedience is Liberty. and all the other Orwellian crap we were weaned on.

#4 - Nagging doubts/Lack of full knowledge

I started realizing what a horror Joseph Smith was. I saw clearly how far off track the modern church was. But I had a hard time admitting that the Book of Mormon was fake. As I studied and learned more my doubts disappeared. I envy those who saw right away that the BoM was a fake. I'd have left much sooner had I known what I know now.

^^^^ agreed we wish we would have woken up so many years ago too ! Now we wonder how many still in are honestly duped trying to care or were aware of lying all the way through. especially those that converted and taught us in the us past.
The on going missionary work sickens me (Taking advantage of and using people!!!

I agree with the (3) reasons that are posted. I didn't have that problem as I just didn't want to go to church so basically I just stopped going. I tried a couple of times to get back into it but never felt comfortable in other wards from the one I grew up in. The only exception was a little church out side of Malad, ID when we moved there. That group made us feel welcomed and helped us greatly. Well after we moved away we never went back to church.

My ex-wife on the other hand, is still going and has raised my boys in the church. My second son doesn't go now but he never really said why he stopped. I'm just glad he did.

Anyways the point is that a family that has been raised in the church, has children that have gone on missions, married RM and have their own children that are now going on missions, it would be an embarrassment to say, "Oh just kidding, the church is a fake and you all have been duped."

The irony of mormonism to me is that it appeals to the carnal mind. It takes advantage of basic emotions. Mormons think they're on some higher plane, but really they're powered by fear, lust, jealousy, appetites, and insecurities even more than irreligious people.
The church patronizes a very passive-aggressive attitude about the world. Mormons are defensive, insecure, paranoid, and a number of other basic immature emotions. In "the world" we recognize these immature emotions as maladaptive, and we grow into more mature emotions. Mormons then passive-aggressively call these maturer emotions "prideful" or "worldly". In their private meetings they hurl damning disapproval at the world as an excuse to consider themselves "not of the world". They see themselves as the answer to the world's problems and wonder why the world rejects their simplistic solutions. Mormons' solutions often boil down to trite adolescent insecurities like "modesty", and "purity", and are mostly, tellingly, sexual insecurities. The progressive world simply has moved past sexual insecurities just like adults move past it after adolescence. But Mormons stay on it, making them, ironically, carnal minded.

I just read an interesting book called Empty Mansions about the life of Huguette Clark. She was the daughter of one of the wealthiest men in the world. He died when she was relatively young (she was born to him quite late in life) and she and her mother were left with a couple of Manhattan apartments, two mansions in Santa Barbara and one in Connecticut.

She was shy, but very talented and bright. She was married briefly (didn't last the honeymoon, but stayed close friends for life with her ex). When her mother died, she was alone for a while in her apartments in Manhattan. She was massively wealthy and never left her home. One day, she ended up in the hospital. Her reclusive life was all she knew and although she had close friends around the world, she decided to never leave the hospital and didn't for 20 years.

Why did she impose this life on herself? She had so many choices. She stayed in that hospital room because she was afraid to make her own life. She'd spent her whole life afraid of anything outside those safe, narrow confines.

Daddy's money.

#1 stated another way is as follows:

Since I recently found out I allowed a cult fraud to tell me how to use my private parts and you didn't out of defiance, laziness, or claiming your own sexuality from the cult. I am going to continue to associate with the cult fraud and continue to give them control over my private parts so that you can't make my earlier mistake look any sillier.

I think that's what I read, if I misunderstood. Sorry. Really.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 03/08/2014 04:29PM by gentlestrength.