Hello, my name is **** and I'm an alcoholic.

I'm also a never-mo atheist. I am still struggling with alcohol and find the Christian-based Alcoholics Anonymous to be of little help in my need to go down the path of recovery.

My question is for the recovered alcoholic ex-mo. Did you surrender to God to help you with your problem, as in the 12 steps? Did it help you become sober? If so, what happened when you lost your faith in God and the Church? Did you relapse or did you find new means to maintain sobriety?

Is there even such a thing as an alcoholic TBM?

I am asking because it seems to most people that the only way to sobriety is a belief in God (higher power). But I've never felt the spirit. I know in my heart that I'm just a drunken animal running around on this planet for a short time. Not an ideal philosophy for one seeking a lasting sobriety and recovery.

I appreciate the sincere responses and experiences from the kind folks on RfM. Before you ask: I'm on this board for other reasons and I am posting under a different screen name.

after my aunt died. My uncle, on the rebound, at age 63 married a tbm who was sweet and as conservative as they came.

It became apparent after a couple months of marriage that she was an alcoholic. He spent a lot on rehab for her, but it didn't work for her. After 3 years of marriage he divorced her.

That doesn't answer most of your questions, but yes, there are Mormon alcoholics.

I want to be cautious so as not to offend the AA crowd, but from my experience that group gets kind of dogmatic. Even if you are an alcoholic, there is recovery, there is peace, you don't need to live with a label the rest of your life, and AA is not the only way or means whereby mankind can achieve salvation.

If god helps you recover, use him, if he doesn't, then stressing about it will only take you right back to your comfort vice. If you want real help, look for a program backed by scientific studies, also nothing beats good old fashioned will power (yes, way easier said than done, but there really isn't a silver bullet). However, it is my belief that we turn to self destructive behavior because we haven't gotten over our emotional and psychological issues. Just my 2 cents.

You don't need to compromise your beliefs just because AA has made you believe that there is no recovery apart from their pseudo religious model.

A quote from Byron Kattie goes something like, "God is reality."
How about surrendering to reality including:
* The pain or whatever you are feeling now.
* What reality asks of you right now; surrendering to what is best for you and those around you in this moment.

Viktor E Frankl was in a Natiz consentration camp losing his family and suffering in a number of ways. Several quotes:
*
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.
*
Viktor E. Frankl
“It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life—daily and hourly. Our answer must consist, not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct. Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual.”
― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
*
“For the first time in my life I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth - that Love is the ultimate and highest goal to which man can aspire. Then I grasped the meaning of the greatest secret that human poetry and human thought and belief have to impart: The salvation of man is through love and in love.”
― Viktor E. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning

Read the orange papers.