You know damn well that if Moroni appeared to you tonight, bright as an arc lamp, and hovering a foot above the floor, you'd be twisting those neck ties every Sunday, too.

Admit it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VH5xJpjnxc



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/05/2014 02:39PM by brotherjoseph.

I'd use those ties to tie him to my bed and do him.

I'd go to the psychiatrist and get my meds adjusted.

^^^^^This^^^^^^

Actually the first thing I would do is call my doctor to ask if I can get off my medication.

. . . and if Muhammad appeared to me and told me Islam was true
I'd be in the mosque in a heartbeat.

. . . and if L. Ron Hubbard appeared to me and told me
Scientology was true, I'd be jumping up and down on the sofa
with Tom Cruise.

. . . and if Jesus appeared to me and told me the true authority
never left Catholicism, I'd be at mass.

. . . and if Krishna appeared to me etc.

However, none of this has happened, so I'm stuck living in the
real world.

If...

http://youtu.be/PD2Skqw1Ess?t=15s

That's like saying if Santa comes down my chimney, I will sit on his lap at the mall every Christmas season...speculative dreaming no matter how you slice it.

csuprovograd Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> That's like saying if Santa comes down my chimney,
> I will sit on his lap at the mall every Christmas
> season...speculative dreaming no matter how you
> slice it.

- - - - -

Even atheists buy these chimney top covers. Why? What are they afraid of? Perhaps their disbelief in Santa is not quite as solid as you think.

http://www.controlcover.com/

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

If Santa comes down your chimney, that'd be a whole different white Christmas! ;o))

Lmfao

I would auction the plates off at Sotheby's, that's probably why God did not choose me as a prophet

I'm honestly not sure I'd return if I had a visit from God & Jesus in the sacred grove. I might ask them why they have such ridiculous plan, and then tell them that just 'cause they're god it doesn't make it right.

I feel church is wrong, even if it were true. (and it's not true)

If god wants me to believe, he can go ahead and send them. Too bad he won't, because he isn't real.

Yer $hittin' me, right, Bro Jo? And if it were to happen?....I should care, why? I suck at obeying, BTW.

Ron Burr

Sorry, but BJ you're full of it.

If a chupacabra came up and bit me in the ass, I'd believe that too.

Right.

IF.

Won't happen.

Has never happened.

The end.

Nope. MORONi won't do it for me. The last time I spoke to (insert your favorite god figure), I told him that in order for me to return to church I would require a visit from him, dead parents, and selected dead loved ones who would testify to me of the truth.

No visitation yet. That was 16 years ago. What a shame...I was told he loves me SOOOOOO much. I'm not holding my breath.

I would need to shake his hand first to make sure he wasn't a demon.

Brother Joseph, be honest: If you were out of town on a business trip, and a beautiful strange women showed up on your hotel doorstep, begging you to ravish her nubile body, you would accommodate her needs.

. . .

Yea, you're right: 0% chance of that one ever happening either.

Oh, and incidentally, if you find my post to be distasteful and boorish and offensive, I find yours to be the same.

Probably even on the same grounds.

That is, your post is both immoral and ridiculously implausible, all in one.

I'd ask him if he's been up to date on his tithing. After all its a non refundable "donation" which is completely volentary and seems God only takes good old fashion US of A dollarz...

Yeah, I guess I would blast him with my remington 870 I keep under my bed being I'm in a stand my ground state and I felt extremely threatned.

"You know damn well that if Moroni appeared to you tonight, bright as an arc lamp, and hovering a foot above the floor, you'd be twisting those neck ties every Sunday, too." - No, I'd just not buy any drugs from that dealer again......EVER! Ha Ha!

It reminds me of the guys in Angels in America. They were certain that they were seeing things.

Yes, but equally, what if Moroni's Gay brother appeared to you, he's not mentioned in the BOM because he 'let the family down' by going less active after his mission then coming out as gay, but by the same token, if 'Moreanus' appeared to you in a beam of light and told you the only way to God was through the via a new ordinace through the backdoor, then would we all be walking funny in the morning?

All this ever comes down to is coercion. Some big bully with loads of power appears as an angel and the implication is, do as I say or catch fire fore ever.

Yet every single one of us on here are pretty rational. Most of us scientifically minded.

If God appeared and simply explained things clearly he'd get way more traction than this obey nonsense. God states don't drink tea because there is a micro organism in it that you can't kill which causes x, or don't masturbate because you need to save all that energy for y.

There is never a reason, just an order followed by a threat. What I'd like is something a little more rational. I don't jog blindfolded on the freeway because I'm rational. A little explanation is PROVEN to shape my behaviour.

I'm ready to obey, well, maybe not Moreanus, and just not a bunch of old dudes in the Q15 that now think we have no right to any insights or answers. Evil little dictators who will be looked on very badly in history.

If....


If my sister had a willy, she'd be my brother...

I recall reading that if Moroni had appeared to JS as stated his head would have been through the ceiling.

Such a visit would be awkward for both of us apparently. :-)

If there were any plausible evidence for Mormonism, I would have stayed. All the evidence pointed to a giant fraud, so I left.