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Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum. 
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Posted by: zaphodbeeblebrox ( )
Date: July 22, 2014 10:52PM

Is it Just me ...

Or, are The Vast Majority of Ex-Mormons on here, Female ...

Is it Women Vent Better by Writing, or is What I've Always Suspected True, LDS are More Anti-Feminist than Most?

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Posted by: Alpiner ( )
Date: July 22, 2014 11:42PM

I think it's a number of factors.

First, women are the majority of the church. In terms of activity rates, women make up a bigger portion of the active membership and tend to be the driving force in the religiosity of the family. So right off the bat, ex-Mo's are more likely to be female than male, as there were more women in the church to start with.

Second, my admittedly anecdotal observation is that men are more likely to find their community outside of forums like this. Especially in the LDS context, men are expected to be breadwinners -- and thus will have a community outside of church they can talk to. Women, who are more likely to be homemakers, don't have that same community (or would have had it in the church). Thus, they come here for the community.

Third, women are arguably hurt more in more lasting ways than men are. Men are taught to be good providers in the church, which is pretty much what they'd be expected to be in any culture. Women, on the other hand, are expected to be mothers and homemakers. The church's teachings puts them at odds with their own desires. Women may give up careers to adhere to church teachings. Men are impacted in similar ways -- they may marry too quickly, or give up careers that require travel or mobility -- but arguably not to the extent women are.

There are other things worth mentioning too. Women are preached to about how great temple marriage is -- and it's never what they expect. It marks the beginning of a life full of dealing with crummy wardrobe issues and ugly underwear. For men, it just isn't as bad.

The church hurts men in different ways, and in some ways it may be worse for them. But I think the community here has a vibrant female presence in large part due to the lack of community outside the church for many former female members.

The above are all generalizations, I realize, as well. Everybody has their own story.

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Posted by: Stray Mutt ( )
Date: July 23, 2014 12:38AM

Alpiner Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The church hurts men in different ways...

Yes, but I also think men are more likely to leave without feeling like they'd been harmed. They just say, "F#*k this s%+t," and walk away.

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Posted by: zaphodbeeblebrox ( )
Date: July 23, 2014 01:18AM

That's What's Worrying me, about Rachel ...

She didn't Keep in Touch with her High School Friends ...

And, Most of her Church Friends Have Moved on to Other Things, Even without her Leaving, you Know?

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Posted by: nonsequiter ( )
Date: July 23, 2014 02:38AM

I just havent gotten around to posting an exit story because in a way i'm still in the process.

Also Im just kind of a procrastinator when it comes to writing.

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