I am a huge Tori Amos fan. I know her music isn't for everyone, but I like the fact that she's a strong, incredibly creative woman. Her music often challenges me as a listener and I love that.

Back in the early '90's her 2nd album "In the Pink" included a song called "God". Included in the lyrics is the line, .."god sometimes you just don't come through." And the song resonated with me, because I was just a few years out of Mormonism and at one of the most enlightening times of my life. At that time I didn't know many TBM's that had left the church and that song made me feel less alone.

Now, after 2 decades of buying and listening to her music I am finally getting to see her play live. It may not seem terribly important and it certainly isn't going to benefit the world at large, but it is allowing me to come full circle.

Thank you to the artists who aren't afraid to ruffle a few feathers.

Do any of you have a story of an artist (music, lit, visual art or film) that helped you get through?

Under the Pink. She grew up the daughter of a southern minister, so she has her own issues with religion.

I discovered Tori Amos by happy accident. She was an unknown starting a tour for her first album, Little Earthquakes. A friend had a ticket she couldn't use, and offered it to me. Why not, I thought. Cottonwood High auditorium, which was maybe a third full. It was a jaw dropping performance. "Crucify" still gives me chills. Next time I saw her, she was doing two back to back sold out concerts at Abravanel Hall.

I am a child of the Sixties, and that is my music, with a liberal dose of jazz thrown in. Jobim, Joni Mitchell, CSN&Y, Carole King.

Of the more contemporary performers, Tori Amos and Arcade Fire, both have interesting religious overtones. The founder of Arcade Fire was raised LDS.

When I was at BYU in '97-'98, I listened to Little Earthquakes almost every night. "God" is one of my fave songs from her.

According to her book Piece by Piece, the minister's daughter also has a bit of Mormonism in her ancestral background.

I feel bad resurrecting this post, but I wrote it late in the evening before getting some shut eye. Resurrecting it is more about, (1)feeling it's rude not to respond when people take the time to comment. and (2)also out of interest and appreciation for the comments themselves. OK,explanation over.

@ Brother of Jerry: Man I envy you for getting the chance to see her more than once. Also, your review makes me even more excited to see her (it'll be her and a symphony orchestra).

I had read that she was the daughter of a pastor and that members of her family were real bible bashers. It definitely inspired me. I was, in many ways, passive/aggressive when it came to my feelings about church; there'd be moments of heavy guilt and worries about Satan having dominion..., and then blow outs with my mother because I hated going to church (not just on Sundays but the activities and the culture). I always found people like Tori Amos brave in their ability to very publicly own what was going on in their heads. I'm still learning to do that.

@ Itzpapalotl, were you already questioning your faith back then? And, did you have a twinge of rebellion when you listened to that song? I ask because as silly as it sounds, it felt like a mini-personal protest for me.

Also, I can't imagine being at BYU. As a teenager, looking toward the future, I refused to apply to BYU and Ricks, even though there was a lot of pressure to do so. Those discussions always fuelled fights with my mum. I made a lame attempt at a compromise by saying I'd think about BYU Hawaii (because it was located in paradise), but I had no intention of going. I was afraid that if I went to a church university it would be the end of me as an individual. I was afraid I'd be assimilated ;-). And after reading many of the accounts of BYU on this forum I'm happy that, in the end, I went to a secular university.

@ Ish, I did not know about the Mormon connection. It seems like she had it happening from all angles. I'll have to buy that book.

Thanks for your comments. :-)

But you didn't express those doubts out loud in my household or you were thrown into the loony bin.

Music and reading have always been an escape and comfort for me, especially from Mormonism. I also credit both with helping me escape the cult. :)

...me for a sunbeam. ;-)

And, I hear you re: getting thrown in the loony bin. Apparently, I needed a lot of counselling from the bishop for my crazy attitudes about church. The one time I actually talked to the bishop, I played dumb. I knew his kids and thought they were awful, so I wasn't about to talk to him.

For me, there were plenty of threats of being kicked out of the house, groundings etc. I think I was a bit of a dumb@ss because I wasn't capable of just playing along until I was older and able to get out. At one point, when I was away my mum told me over the phone that she was glad I wasn't there and that if I ever needed to, I wouldn't be welcome to stay, meaning I could visit for a few hours but never over night. Good times, because Mormonism is all about keeping families together [heavy sarcasm].

Love China from Little Earthquake s. Okay, love the whole album. Wouldn't Happy Phantom be a great screen name? If you die today, you can go chasin' the Relief Society out in the yard.

Music was my little, tiny rebellion. Pearl Jam helped me vent my frustrations. Blind Melon's song Holy Man, their cover of The Pusher, and their beautiful Change (which makes a great exmo anthem, by the way) all felt very personal to me.

Anyway, I could go on and on, but yeah, music helped me tune "the Spirit" out quite often.