It's just ridiculous that, when I finally have a breakthrough in therapy and find out the root of my problem, it's TSCC. Sure, my dad dying was coincidental, but TSCC has swooped in like a hungry vulture before he was even in the ground...and continues.
Because I looked in the mirror to see what was wrong and I saw Mormonism- and I have seen it a million times since, reading information and personal experiences, on this recovery board and elsewhere, and in meeting others and hearing their stories that confirmed what I suspected all along.
And because of Mormonism's tactics, teachings, beliefs, principles, doctrine, history, approach, ways of segregation, practices and likeness or image, not to mention difficulty/ impossibility finding truth within.
And because how Mormonism affects people and makes them act. Plus, like other cults, it is two-faced.
You have to formulate a plan to leave. You think about leaving and the plan constantly. It's the first thing you think about in the morning and the last thing you think about before you fall asleep. You lie in bed at night for months or even years going over the plan in your head, making adjustments to the plan here and there to lessen the impact of leaving on yourself and your family.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/04/2014 05:26PM by want2bx.
Once you leave, the other cult members do everything they can think of to drag you back in. If that doesn't work, they spread vicious lies about you and pretend they don't know you if you run into them in a public place.
madalice Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Once you leave, the other cult members do > everything they can think of to drag you back in. > If that doesn't work, they spread vicious lies > about you and pretend they don't know you if you > run into them in a public place.
That.
Plus things are not natural, normal; every detail about it is fabricated and guarded; they say that it is the only true church... which makes it false.
And
They are much more focused on (force and strings attached) you giving to them rather than them giving to others.
And
There is guilt and shame around every corner. Most members are concerned about being better than others.. rather than simply being themselves, and honoring and loving that.
A lot of defenders of Mormonism are obsessed with the word "cult". It can be defined too many ways, and you can defend Mormonism by looking at the definitions that don't fit. Better words or phrases to use are: "false", and "is not true."
It's much easier for outsiders to recognize cult behaviors. But you're pointing out experiences that are red flags and some members might actually realize something is wrong when these things happen.
One cult behavior I've noticed was that members are sometimes unwilling to express opinions about current news until after going to a Sunday service and finding out what other Mormons, especially leaders think. After that they happily parrot the standard church response as if they've come up with it on their own.
God, I wish I could get a therapist, but my dad doesn't think I need one. Never mind the fact that I've been severely depressed and suicidal since the age of 12, been struggling with self-harm issues for two years, have never had an ounce of self-esteem in my entire life, and am so filled with anger and hatred and confusion and pain that I can't even function properly anymore. I'm so low that even the most basic tasks like brushing my teeth and eating seem so exhausting and unattainable that the thought of doing them makes me want to cry and sleep for the next fifty million years.
But you're right, Dad. I don't need a therapist. I'm great.
(Sorry, that was kind of an off-topic rant. Just had to get that out.)
Are you old enough to go to a therapist on your own? If you are in school, try talking to a school counselor. You need to look out for yourself and make sure you are happy.
Then I joined a choir at a Presbyterian Church. I wasn't a Christian, but each Sunday I heard the Sermons, the announcements etc. This went on for three years.
Never once did I hear anyone talking about "obedience" as a principle. Never once did I hear the names of any Presbyterian leaders even mentioned. Never once did anyone talk about what underwear one should wear. Never once did I hear about "worthiness interviews." Never once did I hear anyone say it was a duty to go on a mission to try to get more people to join the Presbyterian church.
Never once did they mention that it was important to be in the Presbyterian Church. In fact in one sermon it was emphasized that membership in the Presbyterian Church was not something that would be taken into account in the afterlife.
I grew up in the PC USA and my experience was very similar. Eventually I stopped attending because I couldn't reconcile the content of the Bible with my own sense of morality, including the moral lessons I'd learned in the church. The best lesson the PC USA gave to me was to think for myself.
My youth pastor did make an effort to come and see me as I was drifting away from the church, but it was more of a, "How are you doing?" kind of visit. There was no threats or desparate pleas to bring me back into the forld. That was in the early 90s.
I'm friends with her on Facebook. Currently she grows organic produce for poor people in the Chicago area. Mostly, she posts about organic gardening, social justice, and is an enthusiastic supporter of Gay marriage.
My experience is very different from what the ExMos describe on this board, but isn't that different from reading similar stories of former exteame evangelical Christians or Scientologists. I feel lucky to have not been raise in a true-believing anything household.
-- when it can't divulge the weirder doctrines and practices to newbies because they'll leave. -- when it lies publicly about what its doctrines and practices really are (or uses code words), but the hard-core members wink and nod because they know the truth. -- when it stresses obedience over thinking. -- when members police each other and rat each other out to the leaders. -- when sacrifice of everything one has (including family members, belongings, health, and even life) is portrayed as the ideal. -- there's authoritarian control of member sexuality, but the top leaders get all they want. -- you have to have a good exit plan to leave, but they'll hunt you down for years anyway, even bothering your relatives if needed.
A relative posted a Mormon video on Facebook. The message is a classic cult approach designed to suck in the disenfranchised, emotionally fragile and distressed people. Here's the script:
Have you ever felt unnoticed? …alone? …worthless? …left out? …lost? There is something you should know.
Uchtdorf: You are not forgotten. No matter how dark your days may seem, no matter how insignificant you may feel, no matter how overshadowed you think you may be, your Heavenly Father has not forgotten you. In fact, he loves you with an infinite love. Just think of it! You are known and remembered by the most majestic, powerful and glorious being in the universe! You are loved by the King if infinite space and everlasting time!
Monson: You Heavenly Father loves you—each of you. That love never changes. It is simply there. It is there for you when you’re sad or happy, discouraged or hopeful. God’s love is there for you! It is simply always there.
Remember the worth of souls is great in the eyes of God. D&C 18:10