The groundrules:

1. You may not use the Deepak Choprah BS generator (impossible to check but I rely on your honesty. Honesty is the power that reveals the true quantum nature of the universe).

2. Choprah quotes must contain a reference to something quantummy. Tolle quotes must be about power, preferrably within you).

3. Bonus points for quotes that are bidirectional in time.

4. It must sound so deep that the average reader will not understand what you're saying but still be impressed at your wisdom.

I shall collect all quotes, print them in an oddly shaped book (one quote per page, only on the right hand side, in a scipt font) and sell them back to you for only $ 29,95.

I'll start:

"The hidden key that empowers your future lies upstream the river of universal consciousness but first you must unlock the will to get there through the strength of your true desire to change."



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/18/2015 04:40PM by rt.

"It is in awakening we are awakened. The future will be a quantum awakening of coherence. Soon there will a maturing of choice the likes of which the biosphere has never seen."

Ok I cheated but I got so delighted to know there was a Deepak Chopra bs generator that I had to look it up. And technically this is from another bs generator, not the Deepak Chopra one.

Chronic Seriousness is the root cause of the world's travails.

CS is easily corrected by activating one's Clown Chakra.

Shummy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Chronic Seriousness is the root cause of the
> world's travails.
>
> CS is easily corrected by activating one's Clown
> Chakra.


oh ?? There is a Clown Chakra? How could I have missed it. I'm getting on that right now!! It's activation time for my Clown Chakra!! You betcha!! :-)

Shummy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Chronic Seriousness is the root cause of the
> world's travails.
>
> CS is easily corrected by activating one's Clown
> Chakra.


I think my clown Chakra is constipated, I can't activate a damn thing.

I've been told in order to open your clown chakra, one must first light bubble gum or pop-corn smelling incense, eat a rainbow colored snow cone, while wearing neon plastic glow necklaces and bracelets, with festive music playing loudly. Owning a uni-cycle helps, or a really small car-driving around with lots of friends jammed inside...

Ex-Sis Sinful Shoulders Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I've been told in order to open your clown chakra,
> one must first light bubble gum or pop-corn
> smelling incense, eat a rainbow colored snow cone,
> while wearing neon plastic glow necklaces and
> bracelets, with festive music playing loudly.
> Owning a uni-cycle helps, or a really small
> car-driving around with lots of friends jammed
> inside...


Oh thanks Ex-Sis.... I'll try that

And the prize winner is???

Will the winner get an appearance on the Chopra Winfree show and land a chunk of Deepockets Eckhart's toll???

It is in the universal field of all energies, possibilities and potentialities that the mind becomes aware of the doer and the seer, approaching the complete mindful consciousness of all knowingness in divine splendor thus realizing the ever present now which is beyond the constraints of time and space being both all potentiality and non-physicality in one complete and universal mind, both known and unknown.

I've never been to the generator. But I would like to try to be sophistically pseudo-wise.

"We must stop trying to divide ourselves from our one true self because in doing so we are wasting the power within us and changing our self into into a quantumly entangled selves instead of centering our self in its power to express itself."



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/18/2015 05:05PM by Elder Berry.

I hope some day I am abducted by Aliens. Because then I would have great stories to tell my friends about it.

I would reply to all of their questions with utter jibberish. Why? I'm a practical joker. After a while they would all start looking at one alien, the alien that programmed their translator computer. After they yelled at him a while I would proclaim "I was just kidding guys, your translator computer isn't broken, I was just playing a joke on you." And we would all have a good laugh.

Then I would hope that the translation computer programmer is not the same guy that does the anal probes.

Yes I know, not chopra or tollhouse, but making up jack handyisms is more fun.

Ok, i'll try some:

"Only when one has done everything can he realize he has done nothing"

"It is only in stillness that one can feel the movement; in movement one finds the stillness that pervades all"

"There is nothing one can do to attain elightenment; you are already enlightened."

I have an anagram of Doctor Deepak Chopra

Poor headed Crackpot.

From the pinnacle of self-absorbtion, people jump to their own conclusions. To the observer this leap takes place in a flash, but to the participant it lasts a lifetime.

Mind blown

It's one man's attempt to show the guru as charlatan by becoming a fake one, you know, to expose the whole charade...

with a hilarious and unexpected outcome.


:)

We all speak as Deepak and Ekhart, because we are they, and they are us.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/18/2015 07:31PM by ladell.

The wisdom of the inner eternal self can only be activated by a quantum leap into the still pool of the powerful now.

Tough to beat that one

I don't think I can better the ones on here already lol.

But what about this - like for a whole passage?

"Power is only weakness transformed by knowledge. Your true self emerges like a butterfly once you submit that knowledge to the divine. What is the divine? The divine is all that we are, and are becoming, when we maintain connection to the goodness inherent in everything. We need to understand that the divine within us leads us to the realization of the whole self through the universal truths we grasp not only through science - like the science of quantum physics - but through immersion in realms beyond science."



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/18/2015 07:54PM by Tal Bachman.

Only through sifting the sediments of time will we find the four sediment layers of truth. Cow crap May or may not be one of the layers, but from cow crap springs the white and delightsome rose, of truth-ieness.

A random Chopra quote generator already exists.

http://www.wisdomofchopra.com/

Thanks. One of those made me burst out laughing. Seriously, I needed that today.

If you're traveling through time and you happen to meet yourself, it's best not to say anything-because that could really get awkward.

Deep Thoughts, paraphrased by Ex-Sis Sinful Shoulders

“There’s a lot of interesting science now that is suggesting… that our consciousness… that this part of us is not a product of our brain… …the evidence is pointing out that this consciousness is non-local, which means that it exists outside of space-time and therefore mathematically it is not possible to destroy this consciousness. “

I cheated. It's a real Deepak Chopra quote.

https://forthesakeofscience.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/dee-quack-chopra.jpg



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/18/2015 08:41PM by wine country girl.

LOL I'm laughing myself silly over here. I definitely can't do any of these, but yeah, this is what I'm talking about.

Whenever I listen to those guys, I end up going, "What the hell did he just say?" Then I decide they've just said absolutely nothing. They're just hoping that someone will think they're so smart that they're beyond your understanding.

Excellent stuff, folks. I think there's enough material here for two books. And a DVD.

What about some speaking engagements? Who will get to do those?

The one with the thickest accent...

Quantum realities defy time and eschew artifice, for they are the essence of the conscious-seeking self.

Ex-Mormonism is the womb of dimensionless love

"I have a weak chin, but a hard on for power" - Eckhart Tolle

"It's never too late to have a happy childhood." Ahim-sa (aka shummy)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/20/2015 08:14PM by Shummy.

Well I have found that wearing a beanie copter opens my clown chakra better than anything else.

Big shoes shuffle my clown chakra forward into the past, as the blind eyes in the back of my head clearly see the future, when my feet will be tiny and unborn. I leave not two trails of big and little shoes, but the single trail of a well-ridden tapir.

I love Jack Handy's Deep Thoughts, as well as the poetry of Simon and Garfunkel in the acid-trippy sixties.

Deepak and Garfunkel?

Hello quantum, my old friend
I've come to collapse you once again
Because a wave was softly creeping
Manifesting while I was sleeping
And the intention that was planted
In my brain from Deepak remains
Within the realm of conciousness…

Ah yes, nothing like the Sound of Sirens.