I made it all up. I never went to the Center of the Earth.

when you misled everybody....were you speaking as a prophet or as a man?

and were any angels threatening your life if you didn't lie?

I was speaking as a great messenger. I wanted the religion to stand out. It is different from a Prophet or a Messiah.

What is your repentance process?

Drink two bloody Marys and turn yourself around, that's what it's all about.

I think you should change your moniker to water "spout".

A great stream of projectile vomit seems to be forcing its way out the hole in your face.

Does this mean you're not going to hire my band?

No! Waterevil is lying! The church of Waterevil is still true! Back when Waterevil restored the true church, he was speaking as a prophet. But now when he lies and says his church is not true, he is speaking as a man.

I can bear my testimony to you that my life has changed for the better since I joined Waterevil's church. I have had spiritual experiences that prove to me that his church is true. No evidence that you present to me could ever make me deny the truth of Waterevil's church! And I say this in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Maybe you’d like to hire our band then?

We have hamsters. With little Amish hats and boots.

First you need to post some anonymous essays online about your controversial history and doctrine...

LOL I was takking a walk by the beach yesterday when I picked up some sand and I thought it would make a good religion. Know anybody like that?

Sort of like Jodie Foster in that scene from 'Contact.'