Posted by:
Tal Bachman
(
)
Date: December 04, 2015 08:30PM
First, let's get one thing out of the way: everyone needs to listen to one of the most badass songs in the history of rock n' roll badassery (and co-written by my pal, Ed King). Take it away, Brother Ronnie (
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6IMe_ITAXo ). (And check out Billy Powell's KICK*SS HONKY-TONK PIANO SOLO. HELL YA!!)
Ok, let's begin.
Mormons say no alcohol. Odd - since Joseph Smith drank a bottle of wine while he was in Carthage Jail ( scroll down on this:
http://www.i4m.com/think/history/fallen_prophet.htm ). But whatever - NOW they say no alcohol. Great. That leaves more for the rest of us.
You know where I'm going with this: the joy of poison whiskey. It took some years after Mormonism, but finally, I began to try a few whiskies recommended by the experts. It was curiosity, I guess. Thing is, I didn't like them much.
But then - sweet Lord Jesus - I finally got around to trying a whiskey that all the experts say ain't all that great: Jack Daniel's Old Number Seven.
It's hard to describe...it just felt...so right. I think I felt the Holy Ghost or something. It was rude, awesome, hot, primal, smoky and, in some way I couldn't quite put my finger on, arousing. I began having visions of living in a log cabin somewhere in the Smoky Mountains, hunting, and coming home to a possum stew made by my sweet, doe-eyed Christian wife Sadie Mae, who I'd met at a village barn dance, and with whom I would go on to have over twenty children. You get the picture.
The smoky taste from this sweet, life-giving elixir, I came to discover, came from the whiskey being aged in charred barrels, and then drip-filtered through a giant stack of sugar maple charcoal, burnt right there on premises.
I then tried Jack Daniel's step-up: Gentleman Jack. This was normal Jack Daniel's filtered a second time through the stack of sugar maple charcoal. It was smoother, not as raw, but Lordy, it sure went down easy.
I told my brother - a highly experienced drinker - about My Beautiful Poison. He openly mocked me. He told me JD was "disgusting". In a word, he tried to get me to apostatize from My One True Whiskey Gospel. I admit - I flirted with it; I tried the other "way better" whiskies he recommended, but I honestly just didn't like them. There was nothing there for me. I got back on the Jack, and Gentleman Jack, train, and it just feels right.
What whiskey do *you* like?