1. I regret talking to them and telling them about my son who was on a mission in Colorado and would be coming home soon when they came with a much larger group of missionaries into the burrito shop where I was eating lunch in the small town where I live. I regret offhandedly telling them they were welcome to stop by anytime.

2. I regret agreeing to meet with the missionaries after my TBM wife had told me she had arranged a time for us to meet with them after they had repeatedly come by at lest three times looking for me while I was out of town. I was dumb founded and asked why were they coming by and my wife said to meet and talk with you.

3. I regret not seeing through the Sales Bullshit more clearly ( even though I was going out of town for sales training at the time) and way too easily bought into their tactics to establish trust. and easily opened myself up into actually liking them as people and trusting them as individuals

4. I regret not realizing the insincerity when they would say they look forward to coming to our house to meet with me or" they always feel the spirit strongest in our home" even though I had not been an active member for some time.


5. I regret following my wife's urging to open up to them and tell them very personal and spiritual experiences after when they seemingly would tell me about themselves and hardships they may have face growing up. and my wife would ask me in private they have told you personal things about their lives why are you not opening up to them about your hardships?

5. I regret loving them and seeing them as angels or rescuers of me because of my desire to become a better person, husband , father, and how I am living my life (quite happy out of the church)

6. I regret being 100% honest with them because I thought they were being 100% honest with me. and not recognizing the pious attitudes when I revealed honest heartfelt convictions .or revealing my sins to them when I was blindsided when one of them asked what were my sins that were keeping me from believing in the church. and I was completely honest when I told them i struggled with porn. or when I told them I had prayed about the truthfulness of the BOM I had gotten an an strong impression that JS was a very narcissistic person who felt that the Bible does not compare with the Glory of the Book of Mormon. when I shared this with them I was told "Satan must really want you"

In summary, I regret trusting/loving them and seeing them as friends and not seeing the situation for what it actually was , a sales call with sales women and I was just another number / reactivation to them. and not that they truly cared about me as a person. Boy was I dumb!!!

In hindsite they use emotional appeal to sell their product: everything is about feeling. but very little about honesty

"Satan must really want you." LOL.

Sorry you got burnt by the missies. I hope you've set them straight.

It's just more proof that the church is what makes people miserable.

>>I was blindsided when one of them asked what were my sins that were keeping me from believing in the church.

Because that's the only reason you wouldn't believe, right? [/s]

Live and learn.

Now you know better.

Yes I have learned some important lessons. a few months ago the new sisters came by and left a note on our door saying they were sorry they missed us and offering any service projects they could do for us. within a couple of hours there was a knock at the door after dark and after dark we don't typically answer the door if we are not expecting guests. after a few minuets I thought they had left and went out to get something from out of my truck and in the dark I realized there was a car out there It turns out it was the sisters. I was gracious to them but did not invite them in and told them I I know we have had discussions in the past but I are no longer interested in discussing religion. the response from the senior sister was clear "Oh" it was cold that night and the newly assigned sister was visibly shaking from the cold so I mentioned I could tell she was cold so we need to get her out of the cold and told them to have a good night. that was the last I have heard ffrom the sisters and have not been bothered since. :)

You handled that well. I'm impressed when exmos on their own time in their own homes remember to put their own needs ahead of uninvited near-strangers who happen to show up. Those woman were rude to sit there after you demonstrated by not answering the door that you weren't available to entertain visitors. If they were cold, it was their responsibility to take care of the problem.

Sounds like you learned a lot of good life lessons about what to do and not do that is productive and non productive. I don't think this is about regrets. This is about recognition of how our choices sometimes have consequences we did not consider, initially.
It's like Maya Angelou said: "When you know better,you do better."
Ditch the regrets and chalk this all up to education and information and good decision making for the future. And, importantly what you have learned about setting boundaries.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/10/2016 06:58PM by SusieQ#1.

I wonder if it's part of the Mormon conditioning, that sometimes members place themselves in a position of inferiority when missionaries come into their home. Submission.

We had a similar experience as less-actives. Before I learned all the church's dirty little secrets, the sisters would come by often. It's amazing to me now, how we would allow them to lead the conversation and dictate it's direction.

When we eventually opened up and bared our souls and talked about something incredibly personnel and difficult, it left me exhausted and shaking. Yet it meant nothing to them, other than another hurdle to them getting us back to church. The next week new sisters turned up.. omg I can't go through that every time the conpanionships change.
The wall came up then, I don't owe them anything. I'm in charge of me, nobody else. Lesson learned.

I have a lot of sins that keep me from believing. Dozens of secret wives, whoring around, polyandry, massive fraud and abuse of power. Yup, I was a naughty boy.

I think I could get rid of the sisters quick. Just say to them "I think I could be persuaded to believe by a good blow job. Which one of you wants to do the honors?".