It was one of those Sundays whose every minor, mundane moment reminded me that I am so glad I am not a mormon.

Sunday mornings are a joyful confusion of massive piles of Sunday papers, four generations of pajama clad people, and several versions of breakfast, with attendant doggies to tidy up whatever is dropped. We increased our number this morning with the addition of oldest son’s girlfriend, who had spent the night. Mormon moment #1. They guy is 37. His girlfriend is always welcome in our home, indeed, we have actually known her since she was a child and could not be more delighted with this relationship. I can’t imagine having to have something to be upset about because she shares a bed with my son in my house.

I was ready early and the weather was delightful so I decided to walk to church and let the rest of them catch up with me when they were ready. While walking I wondered when youngest son would start his rotation as a high school teacher in the religious education program. He has an undergraduate degree in education, he teaches young people how to create and produce television programs in his community outreach job at a local cable access station. And he is gay. Would the mormons ask him to teach? He is celibate, but that is more the absence of a relationship at present than any desire to have no love because of the sexual orientation he was born with.

Oldest son’s kids, riding with youngest son, arrived in time for the service to start. They spend every weekend, from Friday after school to Monday drop-off-at-school with their dad, who, until he gets a mortgage together, is living with us. On weekdays they are with their mom and her wife. The fact that their dad wanted them to attend UU services with him was discussed with their mom and step mom. Neither of these ladies had an issue with it. Can you imagine if first parish told the kids they could not participate in milestone events because during the week they live with a mom and a step-mom?

Music for today was also not mormon. The prelude was “Peace Train,” on piano by our master musician music director. There was a story for children. After the story, they filed out to their classes while the congregation sang, “This little light of mine,” clapping on beats 2 and 4.

The choir sang Robert Frost’s “Something Like a Star,” form the Frostiana series of songs. I have sung that in many different choirs since high school. I have never liked it. As a result I try my best to pretend it is my all time favorite thing to sing. Since everyone knew it well our choir was able to really attend to one another and keep our voices together articulating the rather cumbersome lyrics. We did a good job.

Rev. Ellen’s sermon was about congregations and what it means to be together with her in ministry. This fall is her fourteenth anniversary as our minister. She pointed out that 7 years is the average for a minister to be with a congregation. The church is about the community, not about the minister. However, a minister of long standing comes to know the congregation so well that she can be with them differently. She grieves with us differently and celebrates in the manner of someone who has watched the teenagers grow up.

Over our afternoon meal we all discussed, “Does this mean she is thinking of leaving or does this mean she finds joy in being a minister of long standing?” We reached no conclusion. But again, very not mormon!

Your family and church experience is everything that an lds family and church is not. Rich, diverse and open.

Thank you for sharing.

Hi msmom

Good to hear that you're doing well. I presume the children you refer to are the ones I know - our love to them.

All the best to you

Tom in Paris

Four generations under one roof is astounding in this day of nuclear families and sound bytes.

Most families are unorthodox today, by yesteryear's standards. The Mormon church just hasn't caught up to that fact yet.

I wonder too, if your pastor announcing how many years she's been there as a signal she may be looking for some other prospective calling ... or it may simply be pride in her having stayed so long with one church family - and she wanted to share that with parishioners.

My rabbi was given "tenure" where I worship - people actually vote on whether they want their rabbi to stay or go. He's a "one in a million" rabbi who's dearly beloved and admired for being able to unite us so well.

He's so invaluable to the life of our synagogue in fact, a million dollar life insurance policy was taken out in the event heaven forbid something were to happen to him, with the building of the new synagogue. That was part of the package deal that went with the sale of the old one. That's how vital he's been to the life of the faith community where I worship. I'd never heard of such a thing before. Apparently it isn't all that unusual in a high stakes real estate deal.

Our hymn was "Blue Boat Home." As usual, I had to quite singing in the 3rd verse because it becomes too emotional for me. The choir sang "Turn the World Around" by Harry Belafonte from the teal hymn book, and were accompanied by music director and accomplished jazz pianist and local legend, Joe Patchen. If only the LDS hymnal had songs by Harry Belafonte... If only Mormonism had Joe Patchen...

But if Mormonism had Joe Patchen, he wouldn't be the same, Mike.

I guess he might have to cut his pony tail and shave his beard. Is that what you're saying?

An anecdote: Joe had to announce some grim personal news a few Sundays ago. It made us all sad. To cheer us up, he played "Linus and Lucy" as the postlude. (It's that jazz piece they use in the Peanuts movies.) He also plays it for postlude on the Sunday near Halloween. I have NEVER heard "Linus and Lucy" after sacrament, no matter how sad the meeting.

The Linus and Lucy music for postlude would certainly lighten up the mood and make people smile.

I love love love "Blue Boat Home." I have left instructions for down the road that it's to be the final song at my memorial service. Beats the hell outta "God Be With You Till We Meet Again." Especially if you have a great piano player and someone playing a drum. My daughter came to church with me one Sunday and I saw that on the order of service. So I decided to just wait and see if she said anything about the melody when we started singing. After the first line she started laughing and said, "Now, THAT's different."

We had the teal hymnbook for quite awhile before I ever realized "Turn the World Around" was in it. That should be in every church's hymnbook. Well, maybe not, the mormons would sing it like a funeral march like they do everything else.

The tune for "Blue Boat Home" and "In Humility, Our Saviour" is the Welsh tune called Hyfrydol by Rowland Prichard, used apparently by several churches. Once in downtown Frankfurt, Germany, I encountered a street musician playing it on a French horn. The UU version is decidedly more upbeat and singable, but the words tear at my heart. I could sing "In Humility, Our Saviour" all day long and not feel anything but annoyance. Mormon hymns are rubbish.

I bet hearing the music from that sweet melody on the French horn was breathtaking.

Heart is of the river
Body is the mountain
Spirit is the sunlight
Turn the world around

Bordergirl - thanks for always stopping in so graciously. Soft Machine Tom - those are indeed the kids you met. I will send them your greetings when I see them again Friday.

Amyjo - what an amazing Rabbi - How lovely to have someone that completely treasured (and insured!)

Mike T and NormaRae - I hear your music! The teal hymn book drives me nuts sometimes, but it is mostly a nice change. And there is nothing like having a professional musician to run your program. There are quite a few UU hymns where I used to throw in mormon lyrics to a familiar tune. It has now been so long that when I hear them, I know they are mormony, but I have to ask Drdad if he remembers how they went in moromondom.

Wine Country Girl - I have never actually paid attention to Turn the World Around. We don't use it currently at First Parish.