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Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum. 
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Posted by: cantsay ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 08:15PM

Hey everyone!
Thanksgiving was something!
I am trying to quit the alcoholic beverages. I need to stop "self medicating"!
The mods here, I believe, have been working overtime!
Anyways.
I want to learn ASL, so that should keep me busy in 2017!
I wish that I could just enjoy a "hard liquor" drink, however when I do, I go completely overboard with that shit!
Home brew is probably the way to go for me.
2017 will probably be the year I learn how to make beer!
Winemaking may be in my future as well!
As to those of you who imbibe on the hard stuff, I wish I could handle it as well as ye all.

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Posted by: donbagley ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 08:16PM

Thanks for staying with us. May you be happy and well.

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Posted by: Tutu not logged in ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 08:28PM

Good choice to stay with us.

Enjoy making beer & signing.

I don't know how to do either but I'm sure there are
many here with good ideas....just ask.

Have you looked for a IRL exmo group? We have one in S. Caliofrnia that keeps us somewhat sane......

It's not all about our childhood religion. It's about living well & being happy.

I'll post the next meetup soon & if you're in the area please join us.

Tutu

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Posted by: cantsay ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 08:58PM

I need to meetup with exmos! I am still afraid about talking face to face with former Mormons!!

They have horns, dont ya know!

Thanks!

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Posted by: donbagley ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 09:18PM


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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 09:13PM

"You have yourself to thank for pretty much everything you do! So congratulations!!"
Judic West, Philosopher at Large, and Small

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Posted by: SL Cabbie ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 09:21PM

You're going to engage in making home brew and wine?

Right...

You don't want what I have, yet (eight or ten others who've come here in the past are also sober and in recovery), so my advice is knock off the half-measures thinking and get yourself some really good stuff, say a smooth brandy, an expensive Scotch, or a Canadian? Or maybe 103 proof Southern Comfort...

Go for it, and get all you can stand. I had to, and I'm not going to deprive you of that opportunity...

SLC
Sober since the Carter Administration,
And hoping this post doesn't make too much work for ADMIN

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Posted by: catnip ( )
Date: November 30, 2016 04:09AM

for the times over the years that you have quoted Patrick Carnes' definition of "addiction." It has helped me sort out difficulties and settle arguments, many times.

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Posted by: ificouldhietokolob ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 09:28PM

I'm glad you're still here, sober or not :)

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Posted by: pollythinks ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 09:50PM

"cantsay wrote, 'I wish that I could just enjoy a "hard liquor" drink, however when I do, I go completely overboard with that shit! Home brew is probably the way to go for me. 2017 will probably be the year I learn how to make beer!
Wine-making may be in my future as well!"

I've got news for you, "cantsay". As my brother, an alcoholic, found out during his "cut-back" years, beer and wine are just as much negative and addictive as "hard liquor" to alcoholics.

"Alcoholics" have a hard time admitting that is what they are, because if one admits this, one understands he/she has to stop doing what they like to do most--drink an acoholic beverage.

This is the h..l of alcoholic drinks (which INCLUDES beer and wine). If you can't control all alcoholic drinking, the only way out is to STOP ALL, PERIOD.

My alcoholic neighbor became an "interviewer" for others (after her own long treatment with professionals in order to quit her own addiction).

Maybe it would help to read "Bob's(?) GREAT original "Blue Book" (sometime found free in library's, as no one is allowed to sell the book--it can only be given away, as it's already been payed for by other, recovered, addicts).

My other brothers and I, and my addicted brother's daughter, hired my neighbor to hold an "intervention" for him. (You need the whole family to gather-around for this event, as otherwise, the alcoholic will excuse him/her self as not being alcoholic, as "so-and-so understands he/she is not an "alcoholic".)

"Cantsay", I want you to know that my brother later admitted that he had intended to kill himself that week, to get out of his trapped condition.

Happily, (by prearrangement), after the families intervention (guided by my experienced neighbor), we got him admitted to a Veterans hospital which treated alcoholics (among other patients, but in their own wing of the hospital).

The "drying out" period is very difficult and exhausting, and uses (among other tactics), a round circle for the addicts to talk among themselves, and call out "bull-s.t" when they recognize "self-excuses" from members in the group trying to avoid admitting what they have become (an out-of-control alcoholic). (One staple line that is used in this group is, "So you've tried everything--your very best--and still ended up with an 'out of control' drinker problem".)

After a certain period of hard work (where they are "wiped clean" of their preconceptions of being able to stop drinking on their own--which they finally have to acknowledge didn't get them anywhere). These person are genuinely SICK.

Eventually (if they don't drop from the program), they graduate to "half-way" houses, with roommates, to try and aclomate themselves back into society on their own. Many can't make this step at first (or at least not until after a couple of tries). And, unhappily, many professional "rehab" programs are not very good at accomplishing what they are supposed to do.

Even so, happily, some addicts do get "well" (like my brother). Even so, they have to remain on guard.
Upon first getting out of treatment, many (who have lost their jobs), need to "dipster dip" for awhile (seek food and clothing out of big trash containers), to help survive economically, as they are not supposed to depend on others to support them, but to become independent and support themselves. Roommates tend to steal their "roommates" food, and a can of beans stolen is enough to kick someone out of the roommate routine, or back into rehab.

Fortunately, my brother is now "dry", but still goes to an alcoholic mtg. EVERY DAY, somewhere in his city, and often leads the group as he is such an experienced person now.

Recovering alcoholics are advised to attach themselves to a "dry" alcoholic who has made good (be this person a "nobody", or lawyer, etc, but is a "recovered" addict), a person with whom they are to appeal for help when/if they feel they are in a "slip-back" danger.

My best wishes to all who are brave enough to tackle this awful addiction. Maybe start with the "Bob's" ORIGINAL "Blue Book" (many later additions equivocate and loose their effectiveness) to see how many excuses for this addiction people go through, before they admit they need help.

The good news: My brother has been at his "recovery" stage now for one or two decades--good for him! He helps prove it can be done.

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Posted by: cantsay ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 10:57PM

Puking your guts out is a good way to start.
They took away my shoelaces.
This place gave me back my shoelaces.
Methamphetamines are dangerous, and so is marijuana.
Mormonism will strangle you.

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Posted by: cantsay ( )
Date: November 28, 2016 11:21PM

Most people have 3-5 really good, great friends?
Loyal friends.
All but one of my friends committed suicide.
*One was murdered
Yes. I do believe that the ones that commited suicide would be alive today were it not for Mormonism.

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Posted by: cantsay ( )
Date: November 29, 2016 01:18AM

Alive and Kicking. By Simple Minds
@elderolddog
I am not that good on the computer,so can you please post this video for everyone?

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: November 29, 2016 01:27AM

I picked one with the lyrics, because I have a hard time with English, when it's spoken by people under 30...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNX0-tCfpCk

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Posted by: scmd ( )
Date: November 29, 2016 01:34AM

Only you know if you can create the moderation within yourself to drink homebrew and wine without going overboard. My recommendation is to self-monitor carefully, and if it isn't working for you, consider giving it up. Otherwise, go for it.I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors. Be well.

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Posted by: cantsay ( )
Date: November 29, 2016 04:00AM

The slow strangulation of Mormonism is like a passive aggressive person.
At any cost,whether it be 10 percent, or more or less, you will always be right.
Go fuck yourself with a used cupcake and chewed up bubble gum.
As for you, elderolddog, that rendition is the best.

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Posted by: incognitotoday ( )
Date: November 29, 2016 05:54PM

Cantsay- for what it's worth, these friends of ours did the same for me. I drink too much as well. I see a light ahead.

Back in my first non-believing days I made beer. It's semi-science and a lot of art. You will spend months, sometimes, just to realize you made some gawd awfull swill. Sometimes you will nail it! Keep more than one recipe going at a time until you figure it out. You will drink less, because art should be honored.

Don't quit and check out. How can we talk with you if you leave?

Love ya. Truly!

teddy

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