Are there any others I'm just clashing too much with people here and it's like my 4th day.

Yes, there are more. reddit

Whoops, Jeff Ricks, the owner and proprietor just put up a statement saying they were under a "Denial of Service" attack, but they expected to be up this weekend.

That galls me, and I'm not one who's registered with that site, and I rarely visit it. I guess there be "Internet Danites" out there...

Anyway, it's postmormon.org...

I understand a lot of ex-Mormons have taken to Facebook as well. I won't go there (too many irons in the fire already; my ex-Mormon activities have been cut way back, but I'm always available for "DNA or MMM questions"), because arguing with TBM's is too draining, etc.

Anyway, I even have my own troll here, apparently, so if somebody you don't recognize tosses some real garbage at me, just hit the report button, okay? I think it's some zombie projecting his garbage on me, and I may well have flattened him with the ol' police interceptor in the past.

Cabdriver Confession: I've never learned to truly suffer fools gladly, even some ex-Mormon ones, and sometimes the road rage gets the better of me.

I am nevermo and have told by just a few that I have no right to be here. Apparantly my getting almost killed by a mormon isn't good enough for some people.
Just because a person leaves mormonism doesn't make them any less an @$$#0£€.
Stick around

siobhan Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I am nevermo and have told by just a few that I
> have no right to be here.

There are a number of nevermos on RfM...many of them part of the community for a long time. If you were told that you don't belong here, those posters were WRONG.

> Apparantly my getting almost killed by a mormon isn't good
> enough for some people.

You don't have to "earn" your way in here. I feel for your bad past experience (I had a similar experience, with a nevermo), but there is no "entrance fee" which has to be paid here.

For me (a nevermo), I just wandered in one day as the result of a Google search, and I never left.

Some of the brightest, the most knowledgeable, the funniest, and the most caring and supportive people on the planet are here, and I consider myself one of the most fortunate people on the planet because I found this welcoming and unique place on the Net.

. . . who gets the award for coolest name.* Also the always insightful and sardonic Beth.

These are some of the pillars of our little community, also never-Mormons, proving that this site is available for everyone who feels that for whatever reason they "fit." You are welcome here and will doubtless find ways to contribute as well as to benefit.

Take some legal drugs, take some time, and you'll find your place.



*BYU Boner gets second place for cool names despite the deduction for disturbing imagery.

Yes, reddit and postmo. But be warned in advance:

1. They also use acronyms. So if you show up and immediately complain about the use of "TBM," they will slap you down.

2. They also are big on reality. So if you talk up the flat earth, they will slap you down.

3. They're just as skeptical of tinfoil conspiracy theories as we are. So if you go in and claim that the Super Bowl is rigged, they will slap you down. (It's also not germane to Mormonism, and so they may slap you down for that too.)

You might want to ask yourself why you're clashing so much after just 4 days.

I dont know if I need a forum really can't vent my mind without getting monitored of every post good thing I tested it I knew someone was following it I was warned ahead of time about the strictness and here it is, so how does anybody recover if they have to filter everything and not truly say what they mean?

Read the rules of this site (they're at the top of the Message List, I think in two different posts).

They exist so that this is a welcoming and secure place for everyone (including the young people who join us---often because they have a problem they need help with).

If you've been deleted, there are reasons for those deletions (and ninety-nine percent of the time it is because one of the rules has been broken).

I've seen lots of venting here over the years, and it's always welcome. But most of us probably have a hard time relating to claims the Super Bowl is rigged as part of your recovery from Mormonism.

Having come from lots of bizarre claims in our former lives, we're pretty quick to point them out in our present lives.

P.S. The Super Bowl wasn't rigged, but maybe tell us a bit about your personal experience with Mormonism?

Its related to me, somehow being brainwashed in a church and then in front of the tv every Sunday and then finally for the biggest game of the year leaves a heavy memory as a kid its both brainwashing back to back church and then football year after year and then you start to see patterns of how they do things and I dont care what anybody thinks I really dont not even you.

".....and I dont care what anybody thinks I really dont not even you."

I think that might be the issue. You truly don't care what others think of your spouting off, no matter how ridiculous it is. You sound like a selfish child. Its so important and profound to you, but not to the other adults on this board that want thoughtful, rational discussion.

When you can grow up and have a meaningful dialogue on subjects that are discussed here, come on back.....meanwhile, learn how to use punctuation :)

I'm lazy with a tablet so no punctuation and I see two counselors for my issues with adults I don't trust them even though I am one I'm like a man that was in mental prison for thirty years and was let go and is struggling to the real world but I know I'm not the only one I'm hoping these forums can advance my healing.

OK then. Thanks for the reply. However, I don't think this board is working for you. Your issues seem to go far beyond recovery from mormonism.

Flat earth? Fake NFL. Name calling, insults, childish rants?

Not only does the board not work for you, you don't seem to work for the board.

Good luck, keep seeing your counselors, and please stay off the board...it truly does not seem to be helping you in your recovery.

If you can eventually feel recovered enough to converse with adults, not hold them in contempt, and realize that feelings and opinion don't equal facts.....then you may find something of value here.

Good luck....and consider a name change....your not as "badass" as you think :)

It was a good trial run I'm pretty much dealing with Mormons so why put myself through more there are a couple of atheists here that were pretty cool like Dave the atheist but as for everyone else I'm not sure you are recovered or are just Mormons on the outside that just don't go to church you talk like they do with the holier than thou Johnny smoke nice name as well.

I think you recover when you no longer run your decisions or thinking process through any type of mormon filter. You just make the best decision for you and move on.

I'm an atheist, didn't believe in the church as soon as I was old enough to have it explained to me (6 or 7 years old), tried it as an adult and went on a mission to give it a fair shake. Learned the true history and left for good about 30 years ago.

So while I spent relatively few years in the church during my 55 years so far, it has had a tremendous impact on me and my life. I think about it almost daily and have negative feelings about the church as an institution.....but I feel "recovered" because the thought of it doesn't control me or my decisions. I live how I want with no regard for the church or its teachings. But I also didn't invest as much as others here. I was active for only about 4 to 6 years.

The fact is that you can't be a cream puff here. You're going to get intellectually roughed up. However, it looks to me like you need some of that. Keep up with long enough, and you'll match your moniker.

Lots of guys want to look like Terry Crews but they don't want to go to the gym. It doesn't work like that. No pain, no gain. Try to change your attitude to "Bring it on, motherf--kers!".

Some examples are, you can't swear without posting a warning in the sub line (yes, some do slip by, but they are not supposed to,) and you can't insult other posters directly (you can say, "Your idea is stupid," but not, "You are stupid.")

People are free to disagree with whatever you write. That's a normal part of the non-Mormon world, and often a difficult concept for newly-minted exmos to grasp.

I checked out reddit and I'm not sure if I like it yet I think the problem is I'm an atheist but I was in the church so when I left I didnt feel like an exmormon cause I always felt like an atheist surrounded by jackasses so maybe I just need a pure atheist forum.

badassadam Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ...I think the problem is I'm an atheist but I
> was in the church so when I left I didnt feel like
> an exmormon cause I always felt like an atheist
> surrounded by jackasses so maybe I just need a
> pure atheist forum.

I am sure there are many different "pure atheist forums" on the Net if that is what you are looking for.

Are you aware that there are a substantial number of atheists here on RfM?

Whatever the difficulty is, I am about 100% sure that it has NOTHING to do with atheism.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/07/2017 03:25AM by Tevai.

Probably not but I don't think I want to talk about religious topics like kolob like people on here do, sometimes I feel like I'm on a Mormon site it's not good for recovery so I've talked about offshoot topics like flat earth and stuff like that it's less crazier than kolob I can tell you that much. And TBM may always bother me I need real people not online but there is no group close by.

I suggest you don't follow every post you post. I come right out and often say exactly what I think, no filtering, whether that's right or wrong I don't particularly care. I try my best to follow the board guidelines, and never attack, or belittle someone else but often state divergent opinions, and I try to support others, especially posts that haven't got 45 responses.

But at least weekly I get people attacking me because I'm not liberal or 2nd-wave-feminist enough or something? I don't even read or bother replying to them...(usually)

>Probably not but I don't think I want to talk about religious topics like kolob like people on here do, sometimes I feel like I'm on a Mormon site

This is Recovery from Mormonism. We are going to talk about Mormonism - in all of its weirdness.

I think a lot of new people here will just lurk for some amount of time before some post interests them enough to get the courage to
post a response. Then it's like a kid in a candy store. A torrent of posts will be forthcoming.

As for deleted posts, Just relax. I think I hold the record.

b.a.adam, just my humble opinion, but your feelings seem to be as raw as feelings can get.

Warning about "pure atheist" sites - it would be difficult to find sites where people demand more evidence for any claims made. If you want to avoid clashing with others using non-scientific claims, you may want to read before posting on them.

It's pretty obvious that you may have been badly abused by mormons, but were they scientists, too? I'm asking because you seem opposed to mainstream science. Mainstream science is like a rock for many exmos; its many well-researched and documented claims show mormononism to be a load of hogwash. Science is like a beloved friend of rational thinking.

Mormonism is non-rational thinking. Since how a person feels is based on how that person thinks, rational thinking can he a basis for recovery. Disputing the non-rational claims of Mormonism with science is a path of healing for many.

Acronyms also seem to trigger you.

I have PTSD too, and when I started communicating with others when coming out of the "emergency phase," my feelings were as raw as yours are now. The "old me" was gone, I was starting to recall some of the abuse and couldn't understand why, or why all of a sudden these very difficult feelings were "invading" my life.

I felt like an alien to myself. I was hyper-sensitive to others. Because I was recalling the actual events of abuse, I at least had a basic grasp of what was now causing the pain.

You have written that you cannot yet recall the abuse, which must be unsettling in the extreme. It can mean that you will seek to "fill in" the reasons for your pain, and can only guess at what might trigger you. It can mean that you are very vulnerable to theories and definitions of things (and people) that might cause you harm. Right now, you might feel overwhelmed by those thoughts.

I read the superbowl thread, but didn't participate, because of what I believed I was seeing: A young-ish man in terrible pain, trying to identify some predictability in his world. Others may or may not have seen what I saw, but many of the reactions came in cold and harsh with rational thinking, the thing that had led them away from the pain.

This board will trigger you, but those triggers will also help to ground you in rational thought, if you let them. Right now, you may he too raw to be triggered constantly, and I completely understand your desire for a safer place. I would like to suggest PTSD healing boards, where you may be more likely to find the kind of support safe for you.

There are a fair number of atheists on PTSD boards, because so many traumatized people rationalize that a loving god would inflict much less trauma on his "children."

Nothing prevents you from being on several boards, and if and when you start recalling specific incidents of being abused by mormons, you may find this to be a very safe place. Right now, I think that without those memories, you are trying to avoid talk of mormons, to avoid being triggered without understanding why you HAVE been triggered.

You are welcome here. It is my wish for you to find a mix of boards and support to help you continue to heal. I hope that this board will be one of them.

s I haven't followed enough of your posts to understand in what way you have "clashed" with others here. I did see your post about your annoyance with the use of the TBM acronym but I only recall some posters offering helpful suggestions and explanations, and directing you to the page provided on this site that lists many (most) of the acronyms commonly used here, and providing definitions for them. Do you have an understanding of why some acronyms, in particular 'TBM", seem to be so bothersome to you? It may be helpful to you, in your recovery, to try to explore this?


Anyway, I am a nevermo and have been coming to this site for approximately 15 years and I have never felt unwelcome, nor do I have any recollection of clashing with another poster. I have had a post deleted(only one that I can recall), wherein I was offering, what I referred to, as a "friendly reminder" of simple spelling and grammar use. I assumed that the moderators decided that my post was too contentious; maybe even offensive to some posters and it was deleted after only 2 or 3 comments from other posters. I do hope you stick around for awhile and can find the support you need that will aid you in your healing and recovery. Is it possible that you haven't been here long enough and read about others' recovery? Maybe it would be of some help to you read some of the exit/recovery stories on the "Biography Board", if you have not previously done so. Wishing you all the best in your recovery....

+

I haven't seen all of your posts, but if you don't like acronyms, then reddit might not be the place for you. It's also a rougher neighbourhood.

I was told about free thinkers how is that one?

2. Put on an industrial strength Duck Suit. That way everything concerning runs off your back like a slick rain coat in a storm.

There is one more -- little one, but very important.
It's the 2nd Agreement from the book by Miquel Ruiz:
#2 - Don't take anything personally.

Got that? You will enjoy every former Mormon web site! :-)

PS: Oh..and about that filter: we all get caught in it from time to time. I have no idea what word I used, but one of them is bugger they blocked.
Try your post again.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/07/2017 05:23PM by SusieQ#1.

badassman, I understand some of what you are feeling. You want a group to connect with but on this type of forum you will find wide variety and often oposing opinions. One of the haulmarks of the forum is that we celebrate indipendent thought. If there is any "group think" it is in regards to our views regarding Mormonism.

I, like you, would like to see people here practice more decorum even when we don't agree. This could lead to more free discussion that could lead board to allow for more political discussion. I visit the sight every day to see what is being discussed but don't enter discussion much as I have limited time and much of what is discussed doesn't interest me. I encourage you to stick around and don't let the wise asses bother you.

I do want a group to connect with I thought I would fit among the athiests but perhaps I don't so far most of the people cutting me down here are over the age of 60 it's pathetic it's like the Mormon church times two I don't belong here so who are the real people with the free minds cause it ain't here this is an old person chat room as far as I can tell I'm not going to argue with my grandpa sorry

Adam, we have all ages here. Speaking as one of the "grandmas," we love our younger board members and try to nurture and support them. Exmos are thrilled when people on the cusp of, or newly entering adulthood find their way out of the church. It can prevent a world of hurt and present lots of wonderful opportunities.

But if you remember the 80s, you are not exactly wet behind the ears, am I right?

Try the Reddit board (r/exmo.) It might be more to your taste.