Two very very young men in stuffy clothing introduce themselves to you as elders? Red Flag.

They proceed to tell you about a guy (JSJR) who saw corporeal God and son Jesus floating above this man telling him to not join a church. Red Flag.

They want to give you a copy of a book that same guy translated from a language you've never heard about yet has parts of The Bible in it. Red Flag.

For many of your questions they don't have answers but tell you how great their beliefs have been for them (in all those years they have lived.) Red Flag.

Seriously, how are they able to get anyone to join?

They don't get that many anymore. The experience is to finish up their brain washing so they will be forever contributors to Cult incorporated.

The first time I really faced how my beliefs might be crazy was on my mission. I was trying my hardest to live the people and naturally I emphasized with them. Big mistake from a Mormon point of view.

I ended up hearing myself saying the craziest things in a different language. I kept telling people about a column of light appearing. It sounded so funny. The missionaries who were the most successful were people who were good at taking to people but they also made fun of them a lot. The emphatic missionaries were less successful and more prone to getting too involved in people's lives and pissing off investigators when they left an area.

I was very vulnerable at the time, only fourteen and a half years old. I had found a friendly Baptist chuch to attend, but my abusive mother also decided to go there and flatter people into thinking that she was so kind and understanding...I knew I had to find another church. At another time in my life, older and wiser, I would not have given Mormon beliefs a second thought. But once sucked in, I stayed sucked in for a very long time. After a while, Mormon beliefs didn't even seem strange anymore.