So, let me go back a bit. I grew up Mormon - born and raised in it. At 15 years old, I decided to question everything - which the church says to do right? So, I questioned and questioned and questioned - I EVEN questioned my sexuality.
I always seemed to turn off guys, or maybe I was turned off by them? I didn't really know and didn't know for the longest time. I took thier crude/rudeness as being just that and not trying to flirt with me - like any normal girl but it really, REALLY made me mad.

It didn't go well for me considering I would get into verbal fights with the opposite sex ( one time I punched a kid in the nose at school and made him bleed). At one point I thought I liked one of the neighbor kids, but I said it since my friends were crushing on someone too. I wanted to fit in and not be "weird."

I was asked "Who do you like at school" many times (I went to a private school), and I only shrugged. I didn't want to tell my classmates I found the girls quite pretty - and was crushing on my childhood best friend!

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My mother asked me down the road if I found any guys cute at the Singles Ward, and it pissed me off - but I couldn't tell her. Those few years in the SW WERE HELL.

Things were not adding up and it REALLY bothered me. I wasn't gay - my mother always told me I would marry a nice returned missionary. However, growing up none of the boys seemed cute.

I EVEN HAD A DREAM of my family - married to a man with kids. But there is one problem.

At age 18 after the dream, I finally realized it. I am gay. Problem is I'm also very Asexual (no or little drive to have sex) but I kind of wonder if that is a stem from my Mormon up-bringing. That or maybe my screwed up thyroid (found out last year I am having problems with it) is to blame. Either way, I can think of ten other things to do than to take a little "roll in the hay."

Either way, I don't know what it's like to be super-duper horney (thank GOD).

I posted on a gay FB page because I had no idea who to turn to.

Well...

My mother found my post on a gay page on FB and qustioned me - even DENIED I WAS GAY and tried to get me to deny it. I wouldn't - I couldn't. I know how I feel and I will not lie to myself anymore. NEVER AGAIN!

I told my dad, and despite him not understanding my gayness (I come from a "perfect Mormon family" of 10 kids), he actually was okay with my asexuality. My sister accepted it wholeheartily but feels bad I have to "carry this burden."

I have officially left the church as of January 14, 2017 because of the searching I have done and learning the truth about the church. Also, because of their "policy" on gay people. I was scared to leave at first but finally had the guts to do it.

None of my family know I left, or if they do they haven't spoken to me about it.

Funny thing is, after I put in my first letter (I sent two) I ended up getting a call from a bishop I HAVE NEVER MET. My records were with my mom but I left with my dad (mom and dad are seperated. How hypocritical is that? Families are forever my a**) and didn't move them on purpse - so I would be able to remove my name.

He wanted me to give a talk in church or say the prayer or something - and I never put a foot in this church.
I wanted to laugh at him but I kept it professional. When I told him I don't go to church, he told me I should "contact him when I change my ways" or something along those lines. I feel like I should have laughed at him now that I think about it. Or just rip him a new one.

I don't get home teachers or visiting teachers and haven't for years. No one really gives a sh** about you if you don't go to church or not. I am actually glad no one has bothered me. To be honest, I am a lot happier with who I am.

If this has helped anyone who might be questioning - if it feels right, then come out of that closet. It might be scary at first but then you find people. If you are in a situation where you can't just hold on a little longer. You have my support and love.

This completes a little summary of my life.

lazylizard - Ex-mo and happy

You're brave to follow your heart.

It's a brave new world, leaving Mormonism.

Mormonism is a religion of the past. It's not flexible enough to keep up with the changing times.

The world keeps changing. Either we change and adapt, or will soon enough be history ourselves.

Coming to terms with your sexuality has never been a better time than now IMO. Being in a religion is voluntary.

Being true to yourself is not an option.

By seeking to marginalize others, Mormonism has marginalized itself.

I can't agree more AmyJo!

I am just so glad I was able to leave. Now I am concerned for my siblings who are still tarpped.

I strongly recommend sending a copy of your resignation to the Member Records department in SLC. You can do so via email. That way if your bishop delays or doesn't carry out your resignation, the MR department will complete it.

http://www.exmormon.org/remove.htm

The Mormon church is a bad fit for gay people. I'm glad you left. It is not a healthy environment for you.

Oh no, I am officially removed. Like completely - there are no more records of my name.

The date I posted is when I was confirmed I was removed from LDS INC.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/06/2017 12:16AM by lazylizard.