Current American politics are so painful to watch. However, it is so hard to keep your eyes off it. Isn't it? I was wondering why this current political climate gives me the same sick feeling I felt when I found out that it was totally impossible to believe in the church.

I think I figure it out. There is a new zombie apocalypse occurring. Something bit these people. There must be a virus out there that mutated. It went from the old gullible, I will defend the religious absurd zombie virus to a political one. It seems similar to the same virus each of us caught when we bore our testimonies and said "I know the church is true. I know the Book of Mormon is true, I know that God the Father and his son Jesus Christ visited Joseph Smith. He is a true prophet."

Remember? Many of us defended that stuff. Some of us even went on missions successfully biting and converted others to this crazy stuff. People actually believed us. We were well trained surrogates. Oh it hurts to think of that. What a painful disease. Watch General Conference this week. It seems like a boring meeting of the walking dead.

Here is how you know you have this disease. Watch this clip of Tommy Flanagan alias Jon Levitz (see https://www.hulu.com/watch/271791 ). If you don't laugh and you feel compelled to defend what he says, then you have caught the virus. You are really sick If you think you can do a better job at defending the absurd than Tommy. Or, you can be a surrogate for a known political figure or be a TBM General Authority.

Some of you may think I have this disease by coming up with such a preposterous theory. No I do not. I defend this theory wholeheartedly. How could it be false? I thinks I read or heard about it...somewhere. It must be true (See disclaimer below).

Remember when you were first somehow cured of this remarkable disease? It was not a pretty sight. You saw that the emperor was naked. Don't look! Don't look! That is some crazy gross stuff. But, we keep looking. This is why we go to exmormon.org to look. Not to look at some naked old emperor(sick). But to see the naked truth.

I feel comfortable with people here on this site. Not that everything here is accurate. Here there is at least a real effort to figure things out and make sense of things. Many here were bitten by Zombies and were later cured. I can relate to their struggle. Most of you are not mindless lemmings but people with a real curiosity. Many of you came here by asking questions. These are questions we were discouraged to ask by zombie leaders. Remember! It was said such questions can weaken your testimony. Yes those questions do. "Do not look behind the curtain." But, we say: LOOK! LOOK! LOOK!


There is hope. There is a cure. CURIOSITY CURIOSITY CURIOSITY is the best vaccine for being bitten by make believe...a zombie. Curiosity killed the walking dead cat.




Disclaimer:
I was never bitten by a zombie. No one I know was bitten by a zombie. The zombie theory is make believe. This made up theory was used to only to make a point. However, if you believe in zombies or a zombie theory like this, if you are offended by my theory, or feel compelled to take a serious defense against this theory, please find help at 721 Fifth Avenue; New York City, NY 10022 or 50 East North Temple St. Salt Lake City, Utah 84150.