I pursued the bishop of my area again to see if he would honor his word and help me out and it looks like he might. So we shall see if he pays my rent tomorrow and i can focus on my health without this stress. Looks like no strings attached but i am not getting cocky about this that is for sure i still have a ways to go healthwise.

BadAss: "I need help, Bishop. What would Jesus do?"
Bishop: "Our Jesus, or the real one?"

Good luck, Adam!

The jesus line does not work with the mormons trust me. They are stone cold joseph smith and ask themselves what would joseph smith do. Keep all the money for myself? Check, marry everybody including fourteen year olds? Check, f#ck everybody in the work force? Check. They would just smile and laugh if i used the jesus line, they know d@mn well they don't acknowledge him except as a sidenote and a name on the building.

I’m glad the bishop is helping you Adam; there should be no strings attached.

I’m not a winter person either. I finally figured that if I were stuck in it, I’d try to make the most out of it. It’s hard, I hate the grey, smoggy, muck of Utah—air pollution at its finest. So, I try to get my lazy ass to the gym. Long story short-I hate working out. I hate the cardio elipiticals. I sweat like a pig; and I fart when I pedal.

The worst thing is the young, buff men who go around shirtless with tats on their biceps and abs. I’m jealous. All I got is farts, chub, and body hair. My best asset is shoved into a jock that tends to look like a thong on me.

Anyhow, great news of the tithing settlement! The Bound Boner.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/31/2017 10:54PM by BYU Boner.

Hahahaha boner you crack me up, it was a reverse tithing settlement, i have been so conditioned to feel guilty from taking money from the church that i almost felt wrong about it all. But of course they never give you back straight cash so i could use it with no accounting. I am trying to make the best of this cold weather as well. I take vitamins every morning specifically to counter this, i think it is kind of working maybe. Do not fart on the peddle machine the perfect mormons do not fart.

Well, I’m glad I made you laugh!

I really enjoy you Badass! When you’re not hurting, I snort, laugh and fart simultaneously at many of your posts. But, I feel pain when you’re hurting.

I’ve got some time before my doctor’s appointment and nobody is at home except for me .... there’s a spider crossing the ceiling .... let’s see if I can take him out ....

I see a spider every now and then in my place as well. I still have to clean the smash marks off of my wall. Well hopefully i won't be hurting too much longer i finally figured out a lot of health issues like vitamin deficiencies, two bad discs in my neck, sleep apnea, and a low thyroid level. And at the same time i think my mind is getting better with counseling and i still have a plan to date my counselor someday hahaha. I almost interupted her therapy session with me to say, "you are so beautiful". Hahaha i can't afford to lose her as a counselor though she knows how to treat trauma and that is important for me and not many counselors know how to treat trauma in this town.

The bound and horny badass.

Well, the spider juice isn’t going to be the only juice that need to be cleaned up :D. I just gotta adjust my aim a bit...

I’ve been able to get a lot of disk relief from over-the-counter Aleve. It’s a better anti-inflammatory for me then ibuprophen. I hope the medical folks can get rid of your neck pain.

The worse pan I’ve ever had was from a kidney stone...the second worse, a slipped disk.

Well, the spider is moving and I’ve got to take care of business :) ... just kidding. I’ve got an urologist on speed dial—so many problems down south. But, no signs of additional cancer, so I’m happy.

Badass, I love you, man! Many of your posts seem to indicate that you are healing from the cult. It’s just the physical pain that’s impeding full recovery. Dude, I just fucking want you to get better. I want my friend Badass Adam to be able to look back at this time and to be able to say, man that was a shitty time. I was in a lot of pain, but the doctors got me fixed. And along the way, I was able to pick up my life and move forward...

Well, that spider moved again, there’s rubbing to be done! Keep smiling Badass! You’re fucking wonderful!

Just so we’re clear on this, my farts are cinnamon-scented, just like Mitt Romney’s.

Hahahaha of course of course.

That's awesome. I hope he comes through for you.

Well i guess that is the real trick isn't it. We will know soon enough after today. I have reserves to cover it in my sock jore just in case he doesn't. I actually planned just in case i did not get helped. I filled out all the paperwork last night that he needed so it looked promising.

Sock drawer* i think is the right word.

That sounds great, hope you get the right amount that will cover all your needs this month.Try to take care of yourself also.
Men are always going to fart while exercising. I've been working out in gyms since 1980. They were farting back then and they're farting now, they'll be farting 50 years from now, so Boner is pardoned.
My husband is one of those . He doesn't need a machine either, sit-ups and push ups will do it also.
Some guys do seem embarrassed, others don't care, some even enjoy it.

You got to love those buff guys that love to look at themselves in the mirror. And i still don't think mormons fart because they wouldn't be aloud in their temple right?

Badass, the men sit on one side, the women on the other. Many of the men are old, and trust me, there are more silent, but deadly, farts in the temple than boners.

Isn't the Mormon temple supposed to be so quiet that everything echoes? That would be a problem for tooters then. I've never been to the temple, so I don't or want to know. The naked rubbing thing surprised me. I have a natural tendency to brush off people who accidentally touch me, and I'd brush away anyone's hand who touches me in the temple, it's an involuntary thing, it wouldn't work out with me either. I'm also not afraid to say that I don't want to do a certain part

I am not a toucher either and i am pretty sure its because of the events of my life in the church, i don't even like to get wet. I just want all cult members to never touch the badass again and we will all be good.

That really helped me. He paid my utilities and my house payment for a few months, then I got food for a year or 2. I found it to be really good food. We got toiletries and even things like brooms. I still have a broom I got from the church and it has been over 15 years since I got help. So take what they offer. When I told my bishop I didn't need food anymore, he talked me into taking it saying that it freed up my money to pay other bills.