Posted by:
Mother Who Knows
(
)
Date: June 16, 2018 05:27PM
You are not overweight.
If you want to decrease your size, you can exercise more. Since muscle takes up less space than fat, you will shrink. Because muscle weighs more than fat, your weight won't change much.
I was your same height and weight (I'm female). I had just had a baby. I started dancing again, because I love to dance, and worked up to dancing 2 hours, 5 days a week. I went down 3 sizes! People commented on how great I looked, but my motive was only to dance. I did not eat less, because I needed energy for all that dancing. I didn't weigh myself, until 4 months later, thinking I must have lost at least 20 pounds. The scales showed that I had lost only 2 pounds. I was devastated, and started to cry, right there on the scales. One of the dance instructors came up to me, and said, "Why are you upset? Think of how you look! Think of what you can do, and how you feel! You are in great shape!"
Being in shape is what it's all about. How much you weigh, or how you look (I have wrinkles now) is not as important as having energy and good health.
Find something you love to do! People who try to go to the gym and sweat, and hate every minute of it, don't have as much success as people who enjoy their exercise and environment. I could never go to "Curves" in Holladay, for example, in that little, stinky room, and handle the machines that were covered with other people's sweat. It was boring and painful, but my cousin loves her's in Provo. This doesn't make me a bad person, or a lazy person. I just didn't like it.
When we moved away from the dance place, I would ski in the winter and hike and mountain bike in the summer, with my children, outdoors. I lived for this! Are you close to one of the canyons? Tanner park? Liberty, Sugar House, Red Butte--there are lots of nice parks in the SLC area. I like walking in the snow, but not when it's colder than 28 degrees. Steiner Aquatics by the U, Holladay Lion's Club, The Sports Mall in Murray, have water aerobics classes, arthritis classes, and adult lap-swimming, and these are nice, clean pools.
Find your own bliss! My busy daughter loves her elliptical machine, which is set up in the basement, in front of a TV, to keep her interest. It's quicker than going to the gym. She is lifting kids and bags of garden soil, doing heavy cleaning, walking the kids to and from school, so her activity is woven into her life.
If you keep physically fit, you can do whatever is required of you. A friend of mine does nothing but yoga (1/2 hour every day) and housework for exercise, yet she is able to run circles around her sedentary husband (the guy with the muscles) on vacations.
We are all looking for THE ONE complete answer. Businesses make money with pre-made Nutrisystem or Weight Watcher foods, instant "energy shakes", etc--all of which are not healthy. (I won't go into why, but it's true.)
If there's one ultimate answer is to have variety in your foods, variety in your exercise, and ENJOY it!
My advice to get started:
1. See a PROFESSIONAL nutritionist.
You need an individualized eating plan, because everyone is different. My daughter and I both had learning sessions with a nutritionist at St. Mark's hospital. Salt Lake Clinic has a Wellness program. Most hospitals have staff nutritionists. You will pay money for this (most health insurance doesn't cover it), but you will be getting the latest FACTS, and not a sales hype for the latest food-fad. Knowledge is power. You will be in control over what you put into your mouth. This helps people with eating disorders, too.
2) Find your own exercise "bliss."
Walking is the No.1 best exercise! Walking gives you the bonus of cheering you up! If you love nature and the outdoors, then get out there! I used to hike with my dog. My dog would pester me, and wouldn't allow me to be lazy and skip our daily walk. I love yoga. The stretches help keep my body fit for the strenuous sports activities. Yoga eases my anxiety. Try that stretching program (Esmonde?) on PBS.
If you want to join a gym join a gym that's airy and clean, and close by. Wear fun workout clothes. Let the music and the people energize you. Learn the weights, through training sessions. Weights don't bulk you up, if done right. Personal trainers are excellent in keeping you motivated, and they can help you with your low self-esteem. That costs money, but is worth it, and you only need occasional sessions, to tweak your workout as you get more and more fit.
Sorry to not give you a quick, one-size-fits-all answer. Variety (cross-training and eating a varied menu) is always a little more complicated, but it is more interesting, flexible, and successful.
3) Get a counselor or therapist, like Brother of Jerry suggests.
You write that you have depression and social anxiety. A good, not-Mormon therapist can help you with this. This is interconnected with your poor body-image. Some people overeat when they are sad and anxious. Depressed people are too depressed to exercise. They give up.
I have been where you are, and I know a lot of people who have been there, too. I've told you about some of the successes! You can succeed, with help, with knowledge, and on your own, and with the support of others. There is a group, "Overeaters Anonymous" that helped one of my friends, who thought she was a compulsive binge-eater. Personally, I found support groups to be depressing and time-consiming, and they didn't help at all. Some ex-Mormon friends hated the groups, because of their bad experiences with the Mormon church. They dreaded the weekly weigh-in's, and felt intimidated with having someone strictly monitor your eating. They also didn't like the weekly "testimonies" of people's eating experiences. The focus is too much on eating.
See why it's so individual? There are so many great choices. If you don't like one method, try another. Keep doing what's fun, and if it isn't, move on to something else. There is no "failure." See the up-side. You will make new friends, have new experiences, learn new things.