Many mormons and exmos have a disconnect in their brains between the mainstream mormon church and the many polygamous splinter groups that their church perpetrated.

As a child I grew up with a plyg prophet living in my back yard. Several of his wives lived in trailers behind our house and he often ran mormon worship services in our living room on Friday or Saturday nights.

At his meetings we sang mormon hymns, prayed the mormon way, recited testimonies about Joe Smith and congratulated ourselves on being better mormons than the ones who ran the local ward house meetings.

On Sunday mornings almost everyone in that group would attend their local mormon ward. They lived in Ogden, Bountiful, Roy, Farr West and other communities in that area.

I was taught to lie about the trailers and the meetings as did everyone else.

The point is that these were mormons. They all believed in mormon doctrine and most of them read and quoted mormon scripture daily.

They would not have existed if the mormon main-streamers hadn't perpetrated and allowed it. That's why I think all mormons and exmos need to be willing to speak out against the mormon polygamy that victimizes the children in these groups. Instead, I often hear mormons say they have nothing to do with any of this. It isn't their problem.

In reality it IS their problem. Women, children and young boys are being abused every day because of this mormon disconnect.

If you want to know more about how it is to grow up in a polygamy situation read my book Plural Bride to Be.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 03/21/2019 10:00AM by Cheryl.

I have to say that your book was great. It was completely fascinating!

I think any kind of religious polygamy is bad because these girls/women are raised to believe that this is what God wants for them. They may be given a "choice", but really what kind of choice is it if you've been brainwashed to believe this is God's way?

I have no problem with polyandry between actual consenting adults.

Well, two things. You're right- the FLDS and other splinter groups live the religion closer to Joe Smith and Briggy Young's mormonism, than today's LDS church. But, all mormons and exmo's are not complicit. I know many mormons that were always told that much of real church history was an "anti mormon" lie. Even with the CES letter and the church essays, on the church website, they refuse to acknowledge the truth, that they were told as lies by their parents and life long church leaders.

They can read the book for free on the main page of RfM or get it on kindle very cheaply or on amazon if they want a book to keep or pass along to friends.

At St. George Utah there is a large "D" on the black hill West of downtown. The D is supposed to be for Dixie & a celebration of the cotton growing heritage and the area being in the southern area of the Mormon pioneer settlements. However, some people say the D should stand for denial:
~ Denial that many southern Utah settlers practiced polygamy.
~ Denial that the nearby communities of Hildale/Colorado City even exist and that they practice a religion much closer to what Joseph Smith and Brigham Young taught than the mainstream church.
~ Denial that polygamy is taught as an eternal principle and the 'faithful' will practice the principle in the Celestial Kingdom.

flip sides of the same coin or like city folk who don't want to admit they have country cousins.

Most people who are unaware of the difference still associate Mormonism with polygamy.

Yes of course we get to have the wondrous privilege of ownership of modern polygamy in the [long] church. Any of us apologists who fail to take real ownership of this is being a dishonest apologist. This is one of the hot button issues that causes me to post here. Us apologists have to be completely honest. Otherwise people might start to have doubts about whether the Church really is true - i.e. super honest and transparent.

How does this taking ownership work?

They could stop covering up and making excuses.

Perhaps say, "It's sad that girls are forced to marry when they're still children. Let's hope this practice will decline."

Not, "Polygamy isn't a problem for me. It's part of their tradition and culture."

Hmmmm, that's not what I think of when I read/hear "taking ownership." To me it's more like, "Yeah, here's the crap I did and I'm the only one responsible for my actions."

Another meaning is taking a project or task and treating it as your own rather than something you do just to satisfy someone else (which, ironically, would REALLY satisfy the person who gave the assignment).

Very simple, Cheryl, most LDS don't live in areas or countries where polygamy is very common. (Well, unless you count the New Age version "polyamory".)

For me, polygamy was never a part of my life in the LDS. Sure, it's there in the history books and the scriptures, and it's what most outsiders know about the church, but we don't have polyg trailers out the back round here. You're more likely to hear about it with Muslims. I haven't met a single Mormon round here who has any polyg background in recent times. I don't think I've ever met a real live FLDS or any of the other smaller groups.

The ones I grew up around lived next door and in the same Farr West Ward.

But that doesn't mean they should care more about me being forced into polygamy than any other mormon who lives anywhere on earth.

You very well might have met mormon polygamists and just brushed off the experience. There are hundreds of these groups in Utah, Idaho, Colorado, California and other parts of the world. Sadly, the kids are the ones who suffer.

I think the Mormon church should definitely feel responsible for it. Joseph Smith started it and it persists to this day. Yet it wasn't the state of Utah that called Hilldale and Colorado City to account. It was the Federal Government. The Mormon church thinks that it's sufficient that they don't allow it anymore. But it's not enough. They have to clean up what Joe started. They need to provide for women and children who are escaping polygamy or the "Lost Boys" who are thrown out of these communities through no fault of their own. The church needs to clean up their own mess.