I have often mused on the role the church played in rendering it impossible for people to be in the church but not of the church. About a decade ago the Q15 tightened down on liberals and NOM believers through aggressive speeches and by excommunicating people like John Dehlin and Kate Kelly. The effect has been to create a binary choice: you are in or you are out. And when confronted with those two options, a very large percentage of people choose out--which is one reason that the DAMU has lost some of its vitality.

With that in mind I am lifting, not with permission but hopefully with forgiveness, a post from Not Buying It on New Order Mormen. I think s/he makes the point well.


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Once upon a time, 15 or so years ago when I first started visiting NOM, it was a very different place. We've had discussions before about how it once really was for those seeking a "middle way", and as time passed fewer and fewer of us were really about trying to be an active part of the Church while not believing in it, and more and more of us were those who wanted desperately to escape but were tied to it to some extent by family ties and mostly needed someplace to vent. I once thought some of the harsh rhetoric from some of us drove the true "middle way" posters away, and I still think that probably did change things.

But you know, I saw a quote today that made me realize that isn't the whole story. This quote from Elder Bednar helped me realize that while because of harsh opinions posted on the site NOM became less "middle way friendly" over time, the Church also made the "middle way" untenable. I mean, the "middle way" was probably never really tenable to begin with, it was a balancing act few people could ever truly pull off, but the Church actively made it less and less comfortable for anyone who wanted to keep participating in the Church if they didn't believe all of the truth claims.

Personal integrity often screws with ill conceived goals.

Though it sometines seems necessary the middle way seems to not be a win/win nor a lose/lose but a meh/meh. Lukewarm. Even the Jesus didn't recommend it.

Passion is a vital ingredient.

The middle way boils down to not following/venerating the leaders, so naturally the leaders don't like it.

It does seem that more and more the church demands total unquestioning obedience. I'm my case, when I made the decision to quit attending and quit paying it earned me one visit from the bishop. When I told him a few of my reasons it's like they crossed me off the list and want nothing to do with me.
But then maybe it's just that they never liked me anyhow.

They're eager to take back those who had fallen inactive only because they were "lazy." They usually don't want those who have fact-based objections to the history and doctrine, because that type might infect the rest of the flock.

My conscience wouldn't allow me to walk the middle way.
There is no middle way when it comes to child abuse.
If you find out about it happening, you either take a stand against it and blow the whistle,
or you enable it.
Singing the praises of a child rapist just enables the rape of 1/5 girls in Utah last year. 1/3 of whom were under 10. meaning 1/15 girls under 10 is being sexually abused.
How the fuck is anybody OK with this?
Mormonism.
In fact, it's a common pattern with patriarchal fucked up dogmatic religions.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/10/2020 11:07PM by schrodingerscat.

I have NOM friends who have taken the 'Middle Way' for many decades. They stay very busy outside of church and don't accept callings that would force them to bear their testimonies about the truthiness of Joseph's Myth. They are good people raising good families. Two of them are some of our best, long time fiends. One of whom is an ER Dr who saved my ExMo Dad's life twice. Privately they tell me they've researched it more than me and written well documented chronologies on racism, misogyny, polygamy, BoA problems, genetic problems, scientific problems, the list goes on. And they put all that research in a tabulated notebook on a shelf in the basement where they never see the light of day.
They pay tithing like its a country club for well bred purebred pioneer stock Mormons. Send their tribe of blonde haired blue eyed beautiful Kids to BYU, on missions, temple marriage, the whole 9 yards. And the cycle repeats itself. Its a self perpetuating money generating, soul sucking machine.

They are better humans than me.
I can't fake it like they do.
My conscience has forced me to blurt out, "It's a fraud!", in the middle of a General Priesthood meeting, surrounded by Morgbots in matching business suits and missionary haircuts, with my son asleep on my arm, in response to Gordo the Clown PRofit saying, "It's either true or it's a fraud. There is no middle ground."