My brother forwarded the below to me in an email. Apparently it was written by someone named Ray Payne. Enjoy!

Oh! And if somebody tries to send you a Book of Mormon through the email, send them this in response.

HOW THE INTERNET STARTED, ACCORDING TO THE BIBLE

Please do not Google or check this with Snopes. They will lie to you. Trust me!

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy. And Dot Com was a comely woman, large of breast, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?"

And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent.

To prevent neighbouring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew to the People (HTTP).

And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed he did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drum heads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others." And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or eBay as it came to be known. He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators." "YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.

Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside.

It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).

That is how it all began. And that's the truth.

I would not make up this stuff.

One Payday, Mr. Goodbar wanted a Bit-O-Honey, so he took his old lady, Mrs. Hershey to the corner of 5th Avenue & Clark. He began to feel her Mounds and to him that was an Almond Joy, which made his Tootsie Roll! Then he let out some Snickers and slipped his Butterfinger up her Kit-Kat, which of course caused a Milky-Way! She screamed "O-Henry!", and she squeezed his Peter Paul & said "you're better than the 3 Muskateers! " She soon became a bit Chunky & 9 months later gave birth to Baby Ruth.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 10/23/2020 10:13PM by Dave the Atheist.

mention fossils of the great IBM System 360 and show they evolved from a great system called SAGE which evolved from Whirlwind which evolved from ENIAC from the distant past....

Was the IBM 360 better than the Univac 1108 ?

Everything started with Adam.