Just found out who is speaking at my kid's college graduation commencement. Last year it was Condoleezza Rice and I enjoyed it. My kids all are graduating one year after the other. Heck they were all on missions at the same time.

First one last year and outstanding job from Condoleezza Rice.

This year Jesus. I mean really? Why is the middle child so hard? I know I was one and my awful parenting came from one.

Thanks for letting me bitch. I haven't listened to an entire talk from one of these creeps for well over a decade and then some. This is my very vocal about loving Jesus kid and they are over the moon that an apostle of Jesus is speaking at their graduation.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/16/2023 01:42PM by Elder Berry.

Slow down. Find a paper bag and breathe into it for a few minutes. You're blurting out sentences that make no sense.

What's the bad situation? Graduation? That makes no sense.

Jesus Karma is an apostle? Huh?

I have no idea who spoke at my first graduation from BYU. I didn't even attend my second graduation. I'd already started a job and was gone.

Graduation speeches are imminently forgettable, and most people aren't listening anyway. They are thinking about family, and the trip back home after graduation, and the graduates are in the middle of moving or looking for a job or both.

Bring your phone and read RFM for 25 minutes.

I don't know who spoke at my BYU graduation either.

Of course, I didn't graduate from BYU--so there's that.

But I don't remember who spoke at my college graduation and I didn't go to the next one either. I took a hike in the mountains instead.

Me neither. I don't know who spoke an I did not go to my BYU graduation. I had no intention of listening to all the blather. BLATHER. A word invented especially for Mormonism.

I had them mail me the diploma. God knows where that is---meaning nobody knows.

The diploma was useless for an artist so I just had to rely on my talent and gumption. Worked out.

But Elder Berry, you are to be commended for taking a hit for your children. Hope they appreciate it.

My BYU graduation was a big deal to my immigrant Mexican parents.  I have exactly one photograph of the occasion.

I sat up on the platform, behind the speakers, looking out over the audience...  I had a paperback copy of Exodus, which I carried up under my gown sleeve, and I believe I unobtrusively read it while the ceremony went on and on.

I have no recollection of 'walking' to receive my diploma.


On r/exmormon, more than a few posts suggest that a ruckus be raised about The Dodo's selection as the keynote speaker at SUU's graduation ceremony.

It's pretty much a 180-degree turn from last year's speaker, Condoleezza Rice ... tell me what the two have in common!!

https://www.saltlakemagazine.com/suu-students-petition-to-stop-lds-apostle-jeffrey-r-holland-commencement-speech/

My middle child does not have much to do with us. We don't know what we did. We want to blame their bestie who doesn't seem to like us. This is her graduation and she is a fanatic about Jesus. I suspect my disbelief isn't something she is really okay with me.

So that is the situation. We are heading to a graduation that our child isn't excited for us to come. And now they is excited for their graduation.

At least there are others, see link above, that aren't keen on this happening.

Elder Berry, just be persistent. My brother and his daughter went through a rough patch for many years, also for unknown reasons. But he never gave up and just kept visiting her, and loving her. It eventually all worked out. The odds are that your daughter and her bestie will take different paths in life anyway.

Thank you for your words. Growing apart from one of my kids probably helped by my family history is difficult. I think she took refuge in the church with her troubles. I did the same to kick my self medicating.

I know that my brother can be somewhat critical, so that perhaps contributed to the problem. So I would say to just be accepting of wherever she's at right now, and refrain from giving advice unless asked for. When my brother tried being critical of me once, I just told him that it wasn't helpful, and he quit right away.

I don't know if that's the problem with your relationship, or if she's just going through a rough patch. I remember my 20s as being a tough time, whan I was trying to find my way in adult life.

Wonderful. I will try to be less critical. Thank you. Your support has been well received.

I can't for the life of me remember who spoke at either of my graduations -- Bachelors or Masters. There were some memorable graduation speeches given during those timeframes, just not at mine. Even the military academies only get the President about once every four years.

She won't forget this one with the controversy.

Unless Mr. Holland goes way off the rails (and that's not beyond his capabilities), my guess is that your daughter will remember the controversy and forget all about the subject of the speech.

I do remember who spoke at my undergraduate graduation. It was Peter Euberoth, the guy who oversaw the Los Angeles staging of the Olympics in the previous year, 1984. While he talked about his success in doing that and how he got there in general terms, he was not, as I remember, very specific.

The more memorable event at my undergraduate graduation was that prior to Mr. Euberoth's taking the stage, all of the graduates, including yours truly, stood up on the chairs in the front row and stood and faced the audience. Unfortunately for me, I was a little unsteady so, even though the staff didn't like me doing it, they actually sent down a couple of other undrgraduates to hold my hands and prevent me from falling.

The controversial graduate speaker at my university actually came the year before. The main speech was supposed to be given by one Francis Albert Sinatra (he was well-known nationally and internationally as Frank). Many of that class's graduating seniors, led by those graduating from the business school (including one of my apartment mates at the time) strongly objected, publicly saying that Mr. Sinatra really couldn't give graduating seniors good advice on how to be successful in life (I guess his long musical career with assistance from the Mafia didn't qualify for them). If I remember correctly, Mr. Sinatra was allowed to speak at the ceremony but someone else (I don't remember who now) wound up giving the keynote speech at that graduation.

You should have mentioned that Jeff Holland was the GA in question. That’s a whole different kettle of fish. Most GAs are just boring old guys. Jeff has earned his place of infamy. I hope he gets disinvited, though I am not expecting that result.

One can hope that if he does get to speak, he gets egged . . . by someone whose accompanying declaration rings out, “…And tell Wendy’s husband that I’m a MORMON!!”

Sorry, I was going for sharing as little personal info as possible but it blew up.

...not to mention avoiding commas and confusing the heck out of me...

Typing emotionally on a phone doesn't help Jesus. It wasn't meant to confuse your karma with the apostles' karma.

if it was who I had heard was speaking somewhere (is it BYU?) that I had heard on the radio.

As for your daughter. My daughter and I really had a tough time for a long time. She went back to the LDS church at 20 or so and she kept trying to reconvert me and she'd fight with me about it and try to boss me around. She did a lot of things.

My long-time therapist told me that he didn't think she was doing things consciously, but that it was just her. She's kind of the bossy type! Like she put on her fb one year that she loved all her moms and put pictures of her mormon moms and me. I hate mother's day anyway. He said to stop letting her trigger me. To think "this is _____" and it is just the way she is. It worked. We get along great now. She's one of the bright spots in my life right now, though she doesn't live around here that much. I was just messaging with her on fb. She's still TBM. It isn't always that simple, but it worked for me.

I always only wanted boys as I got along better with my brothers. She just came along as a surprise as the second twin. And my son has been difficult. He is doing better now that he is taking his medication. He promised me he would. I never thought my son would be the problem and my daughter not.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/20/2023 09:16PM by cl2.

It would be different if she didn't put both me and my wife in her pot of disconnect and discontent.

I could handle Uchtdorf but every time I hear Bednar speak I get a stomach ache and feel like I'm going to blow out of both ends. Holland is the scary one. He reminds me of Inspector Dreyfus on the edge of losing it. He's a loose cannon that might go off on a tirade but is guaranteed to lay some kind of guilt trip on the audience.