What, are people supposed to live to be 124 years old when they die. How would you feel if your only child (vs. your seven children) took her own life when she was 27, and you will never have any grandchildren. Give me a break dude, get a life.

While I'm on a rant, M. Russel Ballard is a wimp, he probably could not endure one day of what I've had to over the last two years.

Most people can no more relate to my post than they can relate to quantum physics. Most posts on this site are trivial nothingness. When someone posts something that is huge, life changing, the response is crickets. If I ever post here again someone please kick me in the groin.

I'm sorry for all you've been through. I don't know how you keep doing it, keep waking up. All I can do is send a virtual hug and hope things become easier (it's never easy) with time.

If you don't leave, we do provide support here, you could come for that instead of a kick in the groin.

oops. I misread. I thought you lost your only daughter to a recent suicide and were grieving.

Then I was reminded of your sexy pesty post about the women in your ward, and then all the virtual signaling about your intolerance for social progression.

I support the former not the latter, and I obviously don't know who you are or what you're feeling.

Cafeteria Mormon Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Most posts on
> this site are trivial nothingness.

This type of broad judgemental statement is not likely to encourage people to relate to you or prompt them to engage in a way that may be helpful to you.


> When someone
> posts something that is huge, life changing, the
> response is crickets.

This isn't an accurate statement either as many people jump in to support others when they notice a need.

I'm sorry for your loss but I agree with the other responses here that your post wasn't clear and I also didn't know what you were referring to.

Also, over a weekend sometimes the board is slower as perhaps people have other pursuits commanding their attention.

Basically, everybody has experienced loss and many here can relate to that regarding the religious aspects (which is the main theme of the board).

There could be a lot of help and encouragement available but demanding it is unlikely to meet a receptive response.

Maybe you could try again to express what's on your mind. However, it's likely better to try and find a listening ear out there in real life because there is no guarantee, or requirement, here that people will be present or supportive or knowledgeable or helpful with whatever is particularly on the mind of any one poster.

I figure that any wisdom or encouragement or assistance gleaned is a total bonus and I don't expect it or count on it as a matter of course. Because nobody is required to or assigned to being a helper here.

That's just the way it works. Free choice as to whether to make a post, answer a post or even whether to read the posts.

It's always great, of course, to have people notice and read and perhaps respond to one's post. But it's not a guarantee that they will and certainly not a requirement.

Again, sorry for whatever it is that's hurting you. But lashing out at anonymous posters here isn't likely going to help you in the way you seem to be hoping.

The ever-loving and accommodating
Night-in-a-gale said:
---------------------------------
>
> That's just the way it works.
> Free choice as to whether to
> make a post, answer a post or
> even whether to read the posts.
>


Unless moved upon by the Spirit...  At which point we must follow the promptings of said Spirit!!

Cafeteria Mormon Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Most people can no more relate to my post than
> they can relate to quantum physics. Most posts on
> this site are trivial nothingness. When someone
> posts something that is huge, life changing, the
> response is crickets. If I ever post here again
> someone please kick me in the groin.

That seems to usually be the case.

...you have not made yourself clear. We have no information about what M. Russell Ballard said, no quote. I suppose your response came after watching him on TV, but since many ex-Mormons never watch conference anymore, unless you post a link or give us a quote or something, there is no way the ex-Mormon community can respond to your concerns.

Agreed. I have no idea what OP is talking about.

M. Russel Ballard went on and on about losing an 80 something year old wife, like it is some sort of tragedy, after bearing him 7 children and who knows how many grandchildren. Completely narcissistic, shallow.

So nothing new.

I'm not a fan of any of the apostles, but to lose a beloved spouse at any age is heartbreaking. Why shouldn't he express sorrow?

Or at least crocodile tears.

heartbroken Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'm not a fan of any of the apostles, but to lose
> a beloved spouse at any age is heartbreaking. Why
> shouldn't he express sorrow?

I agree with this.

People have good reasons to be negative about Mormonism but it's unseemly to criticize Mormons, even leaders, for expressing sorrow and other emotions related to losing a spouse. Yes, age does not diminish the loss. Neither does being Mormon or a member of any other religion, or none.

It is not narcissistic to mourn a beloved spouse and the mother of your children. They were married for a very long time. It sounds like you have had your own personal, tragic loss, which is horrible, but the two do not equate. All people are allowed to grieve the loss of their loved ones.

If watching GC is that triggering for you, you may wish to skip it in the future.

I agree with Blindguy that your original post was unclear. I read it and didn't know what to make of it. Plus, you posted it at a time when many people are not going to be reading the board. Give any post a half a day, or a day to gain traction. And while you are in pain, lashing out at people who generally try to support those in pain is not helpful. This may not be the board for you.

Cafeteria Mornon Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> M. Russel Ballard went on and on about losing an
> 80 something year old wife, like it is some sort
> of tragedy, after bearing him 7 children and who
> knows how many grandchildren. Completely
> narcissistic, shallow.

It's a tragedy for him. You have zero fellowfeel.

https://www.exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,2464855,2464855#msg-2464855

I'm not sure just what he thinks this board is about.

Oh!

And thank you because we can’t bump that one.

*Vanished into the aether*



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/03/2023 02:16AM by Lot's Wife.

I would bet OP is still in seminary.

There is little in my life at this stage that I fear. Losing my wife of almost 63 years is the exception that I cannot contemplate.

It's up there as one of the toughest, for sure Kentish.

You and your wife are truly fortunate to enjoy such a long and happy companionship, as I know you know.

Here's to many, many more years for you both.

Thank you Nightingale. My wife has forbidden me to go first. Still plenty of life in the old pair yet. Planing trips. Fishing in Arkansas in May and almost a month in the other Eden in late August.

Kentish Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Thank you Nightingale. My wife has forbidden me
> to go first. Still plenty of life in the old pair
> yet. Planing trips. Fishing in Arkansas in May
> and almost a month in the other Eden in late
> August.

I thought you told her the same thing. Seems like you'll both have to stick around forever. :)

I love you guys, in absentia sort of, because we have yet to actually meet. I'd love to take you out for an English tea somewhere. They do quite a lovely one in the capital city of the province I happen to inhabit.

https://www.fairmont.com/empress-victoria/dining/tea-at-the-empress/

Pretty much my favourite morsel in the world is a plump ripe strawberry. With chocolate it's divine. And the finger sandwiches and the endless cups of tea. I've never tried the bubbly I see in the picture, not in the afternoon part of afternoon tea that is.

Your upcoming trips sound like fun. Although I'm not much of a fisher myself. I don't like to see my food while it's alive.

Keep us posted! (What life can be like if you're not slaving away for the Mormon God eh?!)