My siblings, one after the other, keep inviting me the Easter pageant this week at temple square in Arizona. Most of them, to their credit have backed off after I politely say no. But my brother today , with whom I have had a very close relationship, would not take "no" for an answer and used our emotional bonds to press, push, try to induce guilt, beg, plead and put on an act of being hurt, and on and on, when I said no. I complained about this to a sister, who was wondering why I was out of sorts. I said our brother would not take no for an answer when I said I wasn't going to the Easter pageant and that I found this very annoying. My sister (not skipping a beat) promptly suggested that I do go to the pageant, telling me this would be so wonderful for me. She also wondered out loud why I would consider my brother's behavior, that of not taking no for an answer and persisting in trying to persuade me to go long past any semblance of appropriateness, as strange behavior. She told me she has to deal with that sort of behavior every day. It's a way of life for her she told me. She said this with the tone of voice that suggested that I was the strange one, not herself or my brother.

I haven't been around my TBM siblings in such close quarters for a long time--it's pretty stressful. Doing elder care for our parents--trying to relieve sibs of some of the burden--but I'm pretty stressed out about some of this boundary crossing stuff.

Put an ad out on craigslist, paying 20 bucks or so for someone to dress like Joseph smith and crash the pageant telling everyone about the many wives he had or BY roaring to the crowd about slitting throats, blood atonement etc. I bet you will get some to do it for a cheap price and the reward for seeing such a stunt EVEN attempted will be worth it. If the attempt to successful, you will have a great memory made.

and if you do this Please PLEASE get some video of it!

I think you need a big dose of Jesus based toxic mental & emotional abuse !

...... OK every once in a while I just have to try to be as damn stupid & ridiculous as the MORmONS just to see what its like for just a second... sorry about that.


MORmONS claim they have a special sense of peace, purpose and meaning in their lives, but the LDS cult thrives on the turmoil they constantly interject into members/ppls lives.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F8yzMX_UOy4

I work cheap. Well, cheap-ish. I mean, I have no shame and I rather enjoy scaring the masses, but you'd probably have to pay me for the day's work, and then throw in a crapload of booze so I didn't chicken out or phone it in. I give my ALL after six or seven shots of Jack.

Not showing up is your answer. Or not being there when they come to pick you up is your answer. You don't need him to say, "Okay you don't need to go."

Well, you might have some sort of emotional need for him to validate your decisions regarding the church, and maybe that's what this is really about, but since he's not going to give it, don't put your life on hold waiting for it.

One of the most important things my therapist told me was, "Stop chasing after the love and approval of those who won't or can't give it, and accept it from those who will give it freely."

because like you said, she lives with it everyday and finds it to be commonplace. But that doesn't actually make it a normal behavior.

I agree. Don't go and refuse to discuss it with them beyond the first 1,000 times you have said no.

I feel your pain. My inlaws (bils, sils, mil, fil) still try to invite us to things... like my nieces baptism(it would be a nearly 1800 mile trip for us.. I found it ridiculous to even be asked to come)... after saying no more times than I cared to I had to get rude and blunt. It worked.

Stray Mutt... I like what your therapist said. That is very relevant to me right now :) Thanks for sharing it.

"Ha-ha-ha, giggle, chuckle, laugh! I can't believe you asking the same questions and getting the same answers. Ha-ha. Give it up already!"

Happens every day in the morg that you tell someone NO and they start arguing with you, trying to change your mind.

Such disrespectful behavior is called "discounting".
It means your decisions/wants/needs do not matter to them.

You can give them the broken record routine and keep saying NO without further explanations until they get tired.

OR you can remove yourself from the situation.

Why are you there giving elder care?
It might be smarter to go home and let the rest of them do it.
Send them some money instead.

I recently read a post about how to deal with manipulators. This was really excellent info. Does anyone remember where it is posted?

It would be nice to read that post on dealing with manipulators. I could use some more techniques.

I thought Mormons didn't celebrate Easter, further alienating them from the ranks of mainstream Christians!

Could it be that they do celebrate Easter?

Evidently they hold this Easter Pageant yearly in Mesa.