Easter Sunday, eleven years ago, my Morg wife of nine years handed me divorce papers. I remember sitting across from her at my dad's dining room table. She looked "stern". I looked numb. I knew this was coming. We'd been living apart for about six months and this was the first opportunity for all of us to meet on neutral ground. I wanted to see my kids and my dad and stepmom. She wanted to see me.

"You bet we got something to talk about!" She sneered at me on the phone. In person, she decided to interrogate me. "Have you spoken with your Bishop?" "Are you in therapy? (because I was "sick").

I answered "no" to both (because I didn't accept the Bishop's authority and I wasn't the one who was sick). And so I got the papers.

I signed them and we went to a notary the next day. She was crying the whole time. Secretly, I enjoyed her pain. The children, who had gone for ice cream with the grandparents, were clueless.

Later we all went for pizza. When we had a moment alone, my dad asked me "well, are you two getting a divorce?" "Yeah dad, it looks that way." "Well, trust me son, there's life after divorce".

I wasn't so sure. I thought my world was ending. I was an endowed member of the Morg and now look at me. I became convinced that I was lost, that I was cursed, and that God himself was personally offended and ashamed of me. And that stupid slogan "No success in the world can compensate for failure in the home" kept ringing in my head.

Well, things did change, but not like I'd expected they would. They actually improved. I met a woman I was more compatible with (who is a nevermo) and we were married two years later. We've been together for nearly nine years and I've never been happier. I stayed inactive and finally resigned from the Morg, and after doing so, things continued to improve.

So Easter for me is not so much about eggs and bright colors or the resurrection of Jesus (whom I still believe in) as much as it is about rebirth and renewal. The promise that change, although frightening at times, is quite often a good thing. Not to be feared at all, only expected.

Fiat Lux

Correction. knotheadusc reminded me that there is one "s" and two "r's" in Resurrection. My bad.

I love you, too. Thanks for resurrecting my love life.

Nice story John. Isn't it funny how the worst thing that ever happened can turn out to be the best thing ever.

Yeah... and it wasn't just the best thing ever for him, either. That fateful Easter changed my life for the better, too. I could never have asked for a better husband.

I remember when we first started dating. He was on his way out of the church, but he had never told me anything negative about Mormons. One day, we were visited by missionaries. I didn't know much about Mormons, other than the few I had met in person. None of them had tried to woo me into the church.

So anyway, I felt sorry for the mishies because it was so hot outside and they were dressed in those ridiculous suits. I let them in one afternoon (it was two guys and they talked to me, even though I was home alone). Later, when I told my husband about the meeting, he said "You didn't 'out' me, did you?" I was pretty horrified. I didn't know that was how he felt because he had always been pretty glasnost about the LDS church.

That was when I found RfM. ;-) I've met some very fine, intelligent, talented people here.

So true, John D. Change can seem like it will always be hurtful and full of pain but it really isn't. Once the dust settles and you figure things out rationally and not emotionally, life can get quite good again. It did for me. Not everything is smooth but the calm is here again and I see that if I had remained where I was, there would not be calm of any kind. There would also be boredom which I had enough of. So all the best to you in this new marriage.