I was recently having some fertility issues that are thankfully now resolved with the help of doctors and medication. My TBM mom was very offended by this and told me that my visits to doctors indicated I didn't trust God's timing when it came to children. I replied that regardless of God's timing, the only thing that actually matters is the timing of ovulation; she said this was disrespectful to HF and reducing a baby to a clump of cells.

I've heard mixed responses about medical intervention (in any area) and sickness/health from other TBMs. A little girl in our ward had leukemia and they all believed our prayer cured her, while a man with cancer was taken according to God's timing though we prayed for him as well. My ex was a PhD in biochemistry working on a cure for HIV, but also believed that HIV was a due punishment for gayness. Do the TBMs in your life trust or distrust Western medicine?



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 11/17/2016 02:19PM by woodsmoke.

My only TBM relation is my eldest daughter. Despite being 'firm in the faith', she displays intelligence when it comes to science and its use to intervene when it comes to health and a better life. She selected 'Tubal Ligation' as a follow up procedure at the birth of her fourth child.

And ghawd did not strike her down!

I wonder if she feels weird, compared to the others?

Mine trust medicine (mostly.)

One brother who is a licensed family therapist is diverging into holistic healing however, and taking up innovative therapeutic treatments that are not used in mainstream medicine.

Our dad died from a botched biopsy. Mom's death resulted from too much interference from modern medicine, and not enough of the right kind of help. She was a hypochondriac. Eventually all her ailments finally did get her though; after having had so many surgeries and things "wrong" with her - she self-destructed.

As for needing help for fertility issues, your mom needs some compassionate understanding for her daughter going through such a struggle. The fact you've been able to address your problem, and find a solution, speaks for the miracle of modern medicine as in it's working as it should, and is exactly what you needed - when you needed something addressed.

Example: If there's a cure for a cancer I've just been diagnosed with, I'm not going to wait around for God to heal me. I may still pray and exercise my faith, but would seek out the best doctors and care possible for my disease.

To have a baby during your childbearing years there is 'no time like the present,' when you're ready, willing, and able to take on that awesome task.

That is horrible about the botched biopsy, I'm so sorry.

I just want to say I am shocked by what your mother said to you. Actually I guess I am disgusted.

So, when doctors perform a critical life threatening operation on someone Mormon and the operation is successful, the first thing out of the TBM mouth is to thank God rather than the Doctors and to insist the Doctors were only able to perform due to God guiding their hands.

I have heard that so often I could vomit.

But your mother can't even go with that thinking in your instance. She has serious issues.

Babies do start off as a clump of cells. What the cells do, how they interact and grow is brilliant. If there were a God, isn't the clump of cells his method?

And if life is so precious, it is your mother degrading the baby by calling those miraculous cells "just a clump."

No offense. Your mother's words just kinda got to me.

Yeah, it doesn't follow any kind of logic. Medical intervention would mean that you *do* value whatever you're trying to fix, not that you *don't.*

And none taken, my mom is really mean. Lol.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/17/2016 03:32PM by woodsmoke.

I was raised on the saying "God helps those who help themselves." Perhaps you could have that embroidered on nice pillows or plaques and give them out to everyone who is critical of your medical choices.

Seriously, does she really think that her god gave us medical science with the idea in mind that we should *not* use it?

It makes about as much sense as deciding that, even if you can see perfectly well, you will keep your eyes closed all of the time. Because otherwise, you are distrusting god's ability to guide your footsteps.

How sad, to live with that.

"..... visits to doctors indicated I didn't trust God's timing when it came to children."

Seems like a lot of mormon women don't trust god's timing when it comes to big boobs either!

Your mother doesn't so much have a problem with western medicine she seems to have a totally neurotic attitude toward sex, which in her worldview should be for procreation only, period, end of list. To not have babies, don't have sex. Enhancing fertility is the flip side of the same coin. Fertility is not to be altered ever.

I wonder how she feels about insulin injections for diabetics.

The only thing Mormons I know don't seem to trust is birth control, as they seem to have their first child before they've been married a year, then have a child at least once a year after that. Even if someone doesn't want to take a pill, there are other methods such as an IUD, and condoms.

My youngest step sister is that way, as she had her first child shortly before her first wedding anniversary, and is now expecting a second child around the time of her oldest child's first birthday. She claims her doctor told her not to take the Pill due to interfering with thyroid meds, but I think she just didn't want to use any birth control at all.

I think that when your mom sees you with a child of your own, she will be happy. At least we'll be happy for you.

Keep us posted.