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Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum. 
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Posted by: wine country girl ( )
Date: October 23, 2010 05:48PM

1. My affair with Joseph (my Brazilian bi-sexual hairdresser, not Smith)

2. How to watch your life blow up in front of you

3. Saved from what?

4. Is that a Book of Mormon in your pocket or are you glad to see me?

5. Living proof you get insanity from your kids

6. You want me to pay HOW MUCH to wear that temple get-up?

7. But I don't wanna go to church!

8. But I don't wanna go to Relief Society!

9. No oral sex? Seriously?

10. Aging - it beats the alternative

Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 10/23/2010 05:51PM by winecountrygirl.

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Posted by: shannon ( )
Date: October 23, 2010 06:18PM

That's gotta be a good ex-mo story.


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Posted by: matt ( )
Date: October 23, 2010 06:59PM

Hey! First ten chapters of an autobiography, I think!

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Posted by: cludgie ( )
Date: October 24, 2010 01:29AM

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Posted by: Tiff ( )
Date: October 24, 2010 01:49AM

Oh wait, it's not.

Stop being an ass.

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Posted by: matt ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 04:18PM

drive you NUTS! :o))

We apologise for the low quality of that joke. Normal service will return momentarily.

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Posted by: matt ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 04:21PM

Prince Albert?" ;oD

Hee hee!

Actually, I know someone who had a Prince Albert. Though I never asked for confirmation of that.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/25/2010 04:21PM by matt.

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Posted by: wine country girl ( )
Date: October 24, 2010 12:11PM

The problem with mormons and by extension, exmormons, is that you are all so goddam literal. I'm speechless by your lack of humor and can't believe you would take that post seriously. Well, maybe I'm just not funny. Sheesh.

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Posted by: bingoe4 ( )
Date: October 24, 2010 12:28PM

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Posted by: wcg ( )
Date: October 24, 2010 01:12PM

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Posted by: matt ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 04:22PM

So, you had a Brazilian?

Ouch! ;oD

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Posted by: Timothy ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 06:56AM

But what do I know?


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Posted by: ExMormonRon ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 08:04AM

More topics for thought:

1. How to lie about tithing and collect sex toys.

2. If your Bishop asks you if you masturbate, ask him to define "masturbate".

3. 27 ways to turn food storage into wine.

4. Four sure-fire ways to avoid taking the sacrament.

5. Family Home Evening for port addicts.

6. The Idiots Guide to Dating Virgins.

7. Consecrated Oil: It's not just for blessings anymore.

8. How to Talk Dirty and Influence People. (thanks Lenny!)

9. The Handbook of Instruction on Aphrodesiacs.

10. The Brazilian Stick of Joseph (Brazilian Edition).

Just sayin'...


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Posted by: Heidi GWOTR ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 10:39AM

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Posted by: Anonymous User ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 10:47AM

I thought the two earring limit was for women.

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Posted by: PinkPoodle ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 11:31AM

I got the humor and it was funny. Still, I would really like for you to expound on the affair with Joseph, even if it is just fiction. LOL!

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Posted by: wine country girl ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 04:07PM

Thanks to Tiff for sticking up for me.

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Posted by: Tiff ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 04:25PM

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Posted by: rudi ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 12:37PM

1) Brazilian Temple Endowments for Dummies

2) How to become a missionary in 14 days, or how I learnt to hate the church

3) It's so true it hurts - interviews with a mormon bishop

4) No relief from the Relief Society

5) Uncle Tommy Needs YOU(r tithing)

6) Beer is... for the belly

7) Waiter, there's a bone in my marrow!

8) Joseph Smith in 3D (R18) - or how the East, and West was lost

9) The Rolling Stone that didn't like the Rolling Stones

10) Ten Little Lamanites


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Posted by: charles, buddhist punk ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 01:30PM

Okaaay, I couldn't resist (Slightly adult, but no Brazilians in my posts!)

1) DIY Tip #47 - pages of the Bible make great rolling paper

2) 3 Sexy Make out Spots at the Stake Center

3) The Sommelier Mixes Vodka and 7-UP at Youth Camp

4) Finding Carnal Pleasure On Your Mission

5) Blond or Brunette? A Critical Look at an LDS Man's Preference for his Temple "Eve"

6) 7 Awesome Apps to Play During Sacrament Meeting

7) Fasting and the Angry Bitch Sister

8) How My 5 Points of Fellowship Raised the 6th

9) "Has it a name?"---That's what she said

10) 5 Worthiness Interview Answers to Remember

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/25/2010 01:32PM by charles, buddhist punk.

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Posted by: jon ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 02:24PM

1. Are you the bishops daughter,....SWEET!

2. I once went to boxing match, and a Church Basketball game broke out.

3. I gave 10 cows for my wife.

4. This is the body of christ, and you can't pass it out without a white shirt and tie...

5. How to sneak a pistol, and deringer into jail.

6. Wake up the High Counciler, it's time for his talk.

7. Hey, let's have a Scripture Chase!

8. How to score like Joe Smith, at youth conference.

9. If the music is too loud we will all go to hell!

10. How to use the Baptisimal Font as a jacuzzi.

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Posted by: my2cents ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 02:27PM

Brunette. Yep, she was hot. And I always thought it was really campy to hide Adam and Eve behind a row of shrubs when they were still naked. A naked, brunette, Eve would have improved attendance and attention, IMHO.

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Posted by: Nina ( )
Date: October 25, 2010 02:40PM

NR 1 How I got dunked A. An angel with a fiery sword stood in front of me. (Should've doused it in the b-font)

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