Jake's and mom, sister and sil and I went out...today to d Say yes to the dress. I think his mom was a little surprised at the dresses. Not very modest..ha outright sexy. But she didn't say a word, she didn't have to. I told her the dresses are different than she's use to. And yes, we are allowed in my church and others and we are to wear them So we looked and I tried on dresses...narrowed it down to three. One of which was ice blue..strapless, sweetheart neckline, dropped and beaded waist, chapel train..drop dead gorgeous. His mom did day why not white..so I said it isn't my first wedding..she said never mind that...if you like one go ahead.
Now we went to lunch before going back at the dress thingy. As we were eating, I asked his sister if she would like to be my matron of honor. Ready for this..she said absolutely not !..i don't think you and Jake should remarry. Well her mom said..what did you just say? Do she repeated it. She said no one approves..well sil said, wrong I think it's great and so does your brother.
H mom and I just sat there while the two of them went zt it. Both of us were speechless. Which for me and his mom I'm sure was a first.
Finally, I said enough. I told her that's fine..but don't plan on attending our wedding. Attending a wedding is reserved for friends and family that wish the couple well and you don't fit the critera. Then i said call yourself a cab because you're not coming with us after lunch. Her mom told her off and so did sil.
Try to be nice right...before she left jakes mom told her she was a terrible person and a lousy mormon. Well my pop almost came out my nose.
Meanwhile his sil said she'd love to stand up for me. Ok with me she's a nice person. Her girls will be flower girls.
I thought for a moment jakes mom was going to slap her which is why I didn't..vbg
So back we went..the dress I picked doesn't come in ice blue..not many do...it's a priscilla of boston and almost looks silver..called diamond it's on her website..in the platinum line.
Sil had a ball trying on dresses..hers will be navy blue..her girls will in a soft, light blue, organdy, floor length with cap sleeves and a sash with a bow..
Guys will have navy tuxes and so will the boys.
When jake and his father heard from his mom what happened...it wasn't pretty. His dad plans on walking me down the aisle. If he isn't in jail for assault..he was not happy with his daughter.
So the next time you try to do something nice..remember no good deed goes unpunished.
stormy
Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 05/20/2011 10:54PM by stormy.
what the hell? I bet she is jealous. Think about it, she has to watch you pick out a beautiful dress and plan a fun, stylish wedding, while she gets/got stuck with an ugly mormon wedding. On the other hand, your mother in law is beginning to grow on me.
stormy,that is just awful. Did you ever expect such a response? Probably not or you would not have asked. So she will NOT be at the wedding, huh? She has no class, no manners, no sense of proper behavior. For her it is all about Mormonism. You are not in her cult and she is going to rag on you.
She could be jealous but she could be just in Mormon mode- thinking you inferior and not caring one bit about you. Glad it is working out anyhow with others. It will be nice for his dad to walk you down the aisle. It will mean something to him and bring you closer I think. Again....you must put all this in a book.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/20/2011 11:57PM by honestone.
Thanks so much...I love the dress..not all dresses look good on me.Frilly dresses well, not me at all. I'm easy 5'10" in my bare feet. Not as skinny as those models or I'd fall off my horse. I don't think they eat. They have to be a size -0..me, a size 6 on a good day. I live in jeans and black t-necks or cords depending on the weather. At my business nice slacks..or if I'm doing the PT, sports wear. You'll love my beautiful sleeping attire..jake's old t-shirts or my cubs t-shirts, real romantic stuff there. But it beats grammies by a long short. I never saw Jake in them ever or I would of beat it out the door so fast no one could see me.
Jake's sister is a pain in the ass. I could see her eyes narrow as one gown after another was hauled out and could see when I tried them on..the distain she felt. She couldn't help but think of her temple wedding and how awful it was..she came out crying. Her dress was terrible and she knew it. Where do you buy such ugly dresses? But it's no excuse for her actions.
I do feel sorry for his Mom, she's bringing Jake back into the family but now what does she do about her daughter? There is very little anyone can do to get me in the same room with her. My sweet spirit..VBG..I don't have a "sweet spirit" it's all fire..goes only so far and then well...it's gone..and it doesn't come back.
All I really want is to marry Jake again and live a nice quiet life together. I can see the quiet will not be possible but we'llhave some fun along the way.
why the hell did she even come? and i kinda figured your Mil would come around....well even if it is a little! :) and: You'll love my beautiful sleeping attire.. well i wanna see that!! (sorry Jake)
So pretty. Last eve. I got on the site and looked at the ones I liked and 358 was one of them. How beautiful. Love the side ruffle. You will look stunning.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/21/2011 11:18AM by honestone.
I changed my mind on the wedding dress..instead of one I originally chose...decided on Priscilla of Boston PL300..nothing on the side...jake said how many times are you going to change your mind..ha..just once..
We talked about flowers...like he knows a lot about flowers...
Think my flowers will be white roses and calla lilies or fugi mums with silver streamers....bridesmaid flowers willw be peach roses and either the lilies or mums..flower girls will have identical mixed past
el roses..some details to be decided later...guys will white rosebud boutineers...
Tables..navy linens..florist will do pastel roses...white chair covers with navy and silver bows..
Cake will be white tiered with navy and silver ribbons...fondant frosting with some design to be decided later.
Jake will help with the menu...did I mention an open bar? Yep...
So far so good..I'll have to find out what color his mom plans to wear for her flowers...does this mean I'll have to call her..I'll let jake do it...I'm a big chicken for sure.
You put her in her place and didn't put up with anymore of her crass behavior. She got the official statement and told to call a cab! LOVE IT!!
So many ways to handle that invitation gracefully, and she had to be a crude, rude, clod! The only thing in her favor was -- she was honest.
Only thing missing was a good slap from mom, which she deserved! If she didn't approve of the marriage, why did she come to visit? Just so she could give her opinion and get shut out? Odd.
I bet mom and the others have had a long talk with her out of your presence!!
She came because it was expected, remember she's a good Mormon girl and they do what they're told to do until it all boils over in a big mess.
That was my big problem. There was no way anyone was going to tell me I had to this or that. Tell is a bad word. Discuss is a good word and compromise even better. Too much telling people what to do in the LDS church and not enough free choice.
She never finished college but hey she could go if she doesn't have more kids. I did it as a single Mom with two small boys. Not easy but can be done.
She needs to grow up and get a life that has more than callings and running to the bishop. JMO
And that's that Jake's mother just got a front row seat to the kind of behavior that she has been guilty of. Suddenly she knows what she's looked like to other people -- after all, where do you think sister learned it? THIS could do more to improve Jake's mother's behavior than anything else at all.
Stormy, I'm glad that the outing went well with Jake's mother, even though sister was a twit. I think getting Grandma and Grandpa behind the game plan will eventually bring Auntie into line too. Who knows, they might just really get a clue about how nasty Mormonism has taught them to be. ;)
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/21/2011 10:33AM by Rebeckah.
Stormy, your wedding dress is gorgeous. I like the color theme for Jake and the attendants as well. Jake's family (well, most of them) will get a front-row seat to see how the "gentiles" do a wedding. Do make sure that there are lots of flowers in the church. *grin*
I'm sorry that his sis couldn't hold it together. At least his mom is continuing to make good progress.
I have to second about the flowers. It makes the whole wedding so bright and interesting. Gives the guests a feeling of beauty added to the wedding party of course. Some people take altar flowers to the assisted living centers after the wedding. That is something I doubt Mormons do-oh that's right. They don't do flowers. What will your bouquet look like?
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/21/2011 11:19AM by honestone.
It sounds like sister thought dear old mommy would gang up on you with her. She sure got a surprise! haha
MIL probably still has her opinions in private, but she seems to have learned to behave herself a bit. I love your and Jake's story. Thanks for updating us regularly!! ;)
You will be a stunning bride in a wonderful wedding!
I think you nailed when you noted she was probably thinking about what she missed by having weird temple garb over her own dress (which didn't look like yours does, I'm sure).
Unbelievable. I can't believe someone would be that hurtful, nevermind that rude.
Well, all I can say is that this event in your life is certainly accomplishing one thing. You're finding out who's really for you and who's against you, which maybe isn't such a bad thing. Know your enemies, as they say.
But that broad had no right to spoil such a special day for you. I'd have wanted to slap her too.
We made it through First Communion. The boys always look silly and the girls look beautiful. Told Jake we need a little girl around here, I'm out numbered. What would I do with another little boy. Hey with a straight face I said..give it away and try again. Actually I'm better with boys I think.
I refused to talk with his siter..Told Jake she could bite me..That lightened the mood, Jake laughed and the boys said what does that mean...told them nevermind.
Matt and Brent wanted to know who Joseph Smith was? The cousins were surprised he was never mentioned once, it was all about Jesus. I passed the buck and told them go ask their father.
Thanks for all the nice comments on the dress, I really am wowed by it. I was perfectly willing to wear the one we were married in, but Jake said no..a new one please.
Now I need help from the ladies...flowers..my thought was pastel Pervuian roses (they grow beautiful ones there and they aren't a zillion dollars..for my bouqet...pull out the peach color for the bridesmaids. My neices said...do we have to throw flowers on the rug? Can we have little bouquets. Sure, why not. Each a different color of the pastel roses. What about ribbons? I have no idea. What about white roses? I guess I'll be looking at flowers..not my long suit...
There will be flowers on the pews...a small bouquet of roses for the Virgin Mary. That's customary. Who knows what Jake and the guys will have as flowers.
I need help!!!
stormy
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/22/2011 01:36AM by stormy.
Just for the heckuvit, I googled Fall weddings and found this link for chic autumn weddings. Maybe you can use some ideas. Also, I think "Cabbage Roses" would be beautiful for a fall wedding and they come in pastels.
My convert Mormon daughter was married in Oct. '04 (civil ceremony). Bridesmaids wore a rusty color dress. We had flowers all over....she had the oranges, yellows, touch of brown berries, and a little green. It was gorgeous. I think most any color if it goes with the season or your dresses will look beautiful. Sometimes the dresses determine colors of flowers. Have fun. Any flower shop will tell you what is in season at the time of your wedding.
Freesias have the most intoxicating scent, I would add some of them.
My sister had miniature ivy in her bouquet and we rooted it and grew it into a plant...unfortunately it died..but the marriage didn't. However, trailing flowers seem to be out in bouquets, I see a lot of wrapped round bouquets, very tailored looking.
I was laughin, though, at the runway model in that video. She sure don't walk like no bride, she walks like she's sellin something, all right, but NOT no wedding dress!
Beautiful dress, stormy...you will look gorgeous. Weddings should be beautiful and happy and attended by ALL friends and family. The LDS zombies will never understand that.
When my grandmother died, I acquired a box of slides taken by my grandfather (who was also deceased) that dated from the sixties through the late eighties. I've been scanning them and posting some of the better ones on Facebook for my family. In them was a whole batch from my temple wedding. The saddest photo was the one of the Washington DC temple taken from the visitor's center, where my grandparents were waiting when I was getting married. Looking back, I can't believe I thought it was OK to leave them out, and how much love they had for me that they came to the temple that day even though they couldn't be there for the ceremony.
As the Mormon world becomes less insulated, perhaps the young people will realize how the rest of society includes all family and friends in celebrating the marriage of two people, and they will start to want that for themselves.
DebbiePA Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > The saddest photo was the one of the > Washington DC temple taken from the visitor's > center, where my grandparents were waiting when I > was getting married. Looking back, I can't believe > I thought it was OK to leave them out, and how > much love they had for me that they came to the > temple that day even though they couldn't be there > for the ceremony.
Oh, man, that's sad. It makes me think of my own parents, and how I obnoxiously, self-righteously informed them that they would not be allowed to attend my wedding and that I hoped they were okay with that. They said they were, but wow. I can't believe I said that to them.
It turns out that there never was a temple wedding, but the memory of me saying that is probably still there.
Well, look at how much we've all grown in learning and in wisdom. We now would never do that to our families, and stormy would now never let any toxic members of her family ruin her marriage. It's all good.
When you think about it, the Mormons teach about eternal progression, while in reality, they remain pretty much like children, and sometimes even spoiled brat children. We're actually the ones moving along and doing the progressing and growing.
It is likely she is jealous. While you get to actively plan the wedding and personalize it-flowers, rings, dresses, music, bridesmaids-she only gets a short ugly little ceremony wearing a green apron, no music, flowers and a dress stuffed with tissues.
Wow, what a gorgeous dress, Stormy! I think it's sweet that Jake wanted you to wear a new one - symbolizes your fresh, new start!
Wish I could go back and re-do my wedding and "cultural hall" reception. Think I'd do one of those barefoot-on-the-beach shindigs. Anyway, it has been fun to read about your plans so keep us posted.
Your dress is amazing! (I just spent and hour looking at all the collectons on the Priscilla of Boston website, lol.) I'm glad your mother in law is coming around... about time! As for the sister in law, I agree with the other posters- she sounds jealous. She def doesn't deserve an invite to the wedding with that attitude. She sounds like she'd be that odd ball standing up saying she objects to the wedding for no good reason at all.