Did a hard thing, a really hard thing. I feel a bit bad that one person in the group had to be involved. But such is life. Will they like it? NO, they won't. Do they deserve it. Absolutely YES, I gave sufficient forewarning.

I will NEVER again reward ANYONE for treating me with disrespect OR as though I am invisible. I will NEVER again grovel and beg to be invited over just once in a while, or BEG them to call me just once every other month or so.

I will NEVER, EVER again spend even one extra dime than I normally would, hoping to be loved and accepted just a bit by someone in my own family, only to have them turn around and accuse me of trying to buy them. It hurts me so deeply,because I know there is a little truth in it. I was a fool.

I have humilliated myself doing these kinds of things, and those days are over. Nor do I want anything to do with those that do not trust me to spend time alone with their children, who say, " We must PROTECT our children from you", as if I am just waiting for a moment in which to tell their kids the "truth". I have NEVER ONCE broken that trust. I am truly sick of all of it.

And I still think I am getting the little green house on the hill in So. Cal. Hope so! Cannot wait to move out of sal tala ka siti where the weather can be so s____y, and where the mo scam continues to flourish.

And now I will go to see "Water for Elephants" with Col. Moroni, the one who loves me most in the world, and then out to eat at our favorite restaurant, India House, and we like it HOT!



Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 05/26/2011 11:23AM by think4u.