I have a SIL who is a passive-aggressive TBM. I was told by my ExMo/formally-resigned-from-the-church wife, she thinks her sister is jealous of my career success because I am ExMo.

SIL has always been a holier-than-thou individual who excludes my wife from activities with her other sisters and their mother because we have both formally resigned from the church.

We lived in others states for years, so it made it convenient to not see her. However, we now live in the same state and every ****ing time I see her, she always says a subtle jab about something and her eyes frequently roll when I respond to something she asks about.

A few years ago, she said a shitty comment and rolled her eyes after something I said and I confronted her on it right then and there. I said "____, why did you roll your eyes and say that?" She said "Ohhh, no big deal." I then said "No, I'd like to know, because that seems very rude and I'd like to know what you meant by it and understand what you said." She didn't say anything. She just sat in the chair looking at the table ignoring me. I let it go.

Today, she is unemployed, divorced, and the world seems to revolve around her and her child.

I've never been treated this way and was wondering if others here have experience a TBM relative who has ever outwardly stated they can't understand your success after you left the church.

I am curious.

but my TBM parents and TBM brother and sister do not see any of it, never have, and never will.

I put up with slights and instults from the parents but have pretty much cut off contact with the two older sublings who are insufferable.

My exmo younger brothers and sister are also doing well compared to the older ones who had way more children than they wanted and who were never able to prosper.

Yes, my sister. She is the youngest of 4 - all of us are out of the cult, but she acts so upity and superior. Numorous times, in fact as often as she can, she will bring up finances and how much money her husband makes.
During our last family get together I mentioned that we would like to take the kids to Disneyland and wouldn't it be nice if some of their cousins could come also? She immediatly replied that she is 'responsible' with her money and does not waste it in such useless things.
My daughter was in the hospital with pneumonia and she came to visit, and mentioned they may be moving into town (her husband drives 2 hours each way to get to work) and my father was very happy as they live in the country. He said it was a good move and specially now that house prices are still low. She jumped on him and said they had no plans whatsoever to move right away (then why bring it up) and that her husband is 'rich' they can move anytime they want regardless of home prices.

I had to bite my tongue and my father did not pursue the issue as we were in a hospital room and it was dropped. Here is the kicker:

- I alone make more money than her husband does per year - I know I do because she never fails to mention how much money he gets. Except she does not know that, because it is none of her business what I make. Then there is my husband income added to it. I also never say anything because it is rude, some of my siblings do not make as much, and my mother is fairly poor, so I never rub it in anyone's face.

- I am responsible with my finances and do not consider a vacation with my children a waste of time. We went and had a great time together. What is a waste of time in my opinion is giving 10% of your income, and 100% of your time to a cult to build malls. Her family went on a vacation, they travelled the mormom 'historical' sites. Their testimonkeys are more powerful than ever now.

I have worked all my life since I was 12 years old... she worked for 1 year after she married and then never again. So have a bit of respect, don't bring up your money in my house, or make judgements on how I spend my money or the worthiness of my adventures. I have never depended on you.

There, that will be what she hears next time she opens her mouth.

Honestly, I'm the sort who would simply apologize to them.

"I'm so sorry that your life is so void of joy that you can only seem to feel pleasure if you are denigrating another human being. I really hope you feel better about yourself one day."

And then I'd walk away. And a certainly wouldn't go out of my way to be anywhere near the culprit at any other family functions.